Mahtari

Search for a member

Mahtari

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 22 February 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 12840
  • Number of comments : 141
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Mahtari : I shitpost and pretend to be Japanese.

Mahtari's page activity

Visits<b>TheEpicWario</b> - the 10/07/2016 at 5:45pm<b>Mons</b> - the 10/05/2016 at 8:35am<b>Sayeret_Matkal</b> - the 10/04/2016 at 8:48pm<b>smw83</b> - the 10/04/2016 at 5:22pm<b>xxgood_vibesxx</b> - the 09/03/2016 at 1:23am<b>kingofthelawyers</b> - the 08/22/2016 at 12:02pm<b>wreckdit</b> - the 08/05/2016 at 4:53pm<b>strangegirl505</b> - the 07/24/2016 at 4:15am<b>cornyrob</b> - the 07/18/2016 at 6:31am<b>KitsuneDuo</b> - the 07/16/2016 at 1:36pm<b>BabooonLove</b> - the 07/16/2016 at 11:19am<b>davisjenny81</b> - the 07/16/2016 at 9:47am<b>kaz55</b> - the 07/16/2016 at 8:19am<b>kfchicken</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 10:53am<b>ericanicole1</b> - the 07/04/2016 at 11:42pm<b>maemismile</b> - the 07/02/2016 at 1:34pm<b>wallac7</b> - the 07/02/2016 at 8:35am<b>Flyndaran</b> - the 07/01/2016 at 6:37pm

Fucked!<b>marcus_1028</b> - the 06/30/2016 at 2:39pm<b>pippa247</b> - the 06/30/2016 at 1:19pm

Mahtari's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of Mahtari's badges

Mahtari's favorite FMLs

Today, I was giving my guy a blowjob. When he blurted out, "Oh Jesus" I assumed I was doing a good job. I looked up to see the expression on his face and noticed a look of terror. He was staring at my growling cat, two seconds away from clawing his face off. FML

by jealouspussy / 02/20/2013 at 1:55am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was at a club when a notoriously desperate and disgusting guy asked me to grind with him. Hoping for some backup, I coolly said, "You'll have to ask my boyfriend." My boyfriend's response? "Yeah, man, I don't care." FML

by really / 02/19/2013 at 10:27am / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went in to get my first tattoo. I'd put a lot of thought into it and was really excited when the day came. Long story short, the Celtic knot I'd gotten turned out to have an alternate meaning of "female sex slave." The faces my very Irish family made were beyond words. FML

by UnluckyInk / 02/18/2013 at 3:50am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I was at my boyfriend's grandmother's house meeting her for the first time. I excused myself to the restroom and as I walked out of the room I heard her say, "You could do a lot better. She's fat." Then I heard my boyfriend reply, "I know." FML

by Anonymous / 02/18/2013 at 2:09am / United States (Kentucky) / Love

Today, my mom called me a "heartless bitch" for eating the last Hot Pocket. This is coming from a woman who, just last week, faked having cancer to get out of a speeding ticket. FML

by DontGetSlapped / 02/17/2013 at 7:24pm / United States (Arkansas) / Transportation

Today, I took an afternoon nap, and when I woke up, it was pitch black outside. Still groggy, I went downstairs, only to see my dad sporting a shocked expression and a suspiciously powder-white beard. He actually almost convinced me that I'd just woken up from a five year coma. FML

by Anonymous / 02/17/2013 at 12:56am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I felt frisky, so I did my hair and put on make-up and some lingerie. I walked into the living room, where my husband was playing a video game. He glanced up, said, "Oh, for fuck's sake." and made me wait nearly 15 minutes for him to reach a save-game point. FML

by Anonymous / 02/14/2013 at 6:00pm / United Kingdom (Staffordshire) / Love

Today, I've been living in Kenya in a nasty apartment for so long that when I looked down into my drink and saw a dead fly, I just picked it out and continued drinking. FML

by kenyaliving / 02/13/2013 at 5:04pm / Kenya / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to convince my dad that text lingo causes brain damage just to try to get him to stop. He actually believed me, and is telling everyone they have, or will receive brain damage soon. FML

by oh my dad / 02/13/2013 at 11:45am / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got my very first yeast infection. Thinking she would help me, I went to my mom. Instead she began yelling about how I'm lying and it's an STD and I don't believe in the power of Jesus. FML

by Anonymous / 02/12/2013 at 6:01pm / United States / Health

Today, my little sister chased me around the house with a mallet, giggling like a maniac. I ended up having to pin her to the ground, rip the mallet out of her hand and lock her in the bathroom. This isn't the first time. My mom still insists it's perfectly normal. FML

by littlemiss / 02/10/2013 at 11:17am / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I gave my 5-year-old daughter a unicorn pillow pet. She ended up giving him an ill-advised name, and has been loudly proclaiming to everyone she sees that her pillow pet is Horny. FML

by Anonymous / 02/09/2013 at 3:03pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, at a mixed-family game of rugby, my dad resorted to calling me a "goddamned accident" and eventually body-slamming me, just so I'd stop playing long enough for his team to score. FML

by Anonymous / 02/08/2013 at 8:53pm / Australia (Victoria) / Health

Today, I watched The Passion of the Christ with my girlfriend. She kept scoffing at what she called the "historical inaccuracies", and actually tried to convince me that Hitler killed Jesus. When I corrected her, she looked at me, mouth agape, as if I was insane. FML

by and she doesn't even give bjs / 02/08/2013 at 7:44pm / Argentina (Distrito Federal) / Love

Today, I was taking a stroll in our yard, when my mother decided it would be hilarious to run me down with her Segway. FML

by Anonymous / 02/08/2013 at 4:20pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous