About Madrias : Just another person who has an opinion.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Today, at work, I walked in on a disoriented elderly woman eating nachos and cheese off the bathroom floor. She wasn't wearing any pants. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27534) - you deserved it (1891)
On 03/17/2013 at 11:14pm - work - by Ihatemyjob (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I had to explain to my husband that the 5-second rule doesn't apply if you drop the floss into the toilet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27539) - you deserved it (1961)
On 01/13/2013 at 10:36pm - misc - by PeeFlavouredFloss (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8844) - you deserved it (31186)
Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29514) - you deserved it (2878)
Today, I was joking around with my eight-year-old son. I told him to pull my finger. I farted, then laughed. He decided to try it on his mother. When she pulled his finger, he crapped his pants. He told her I taught him how to do it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9150) - you deserved it (17089)
Today, I was at the gym trying to impress a hot girl, so I put an extra 30 pounds on the bar, I lowered, pushed... and pooped. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10055) - you deserved it (29164)
On 05/04/2012 at 8:49am - health - by authorsubmit - United States
Today, I cut my finger with a plastic knife while demonstrating that you can't cut yourself with a plastic knife. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8717) - you deserved it (30697)
On 01/30/2012 at 10:27am - health - by cbad (woman) - United States
Today, my grandfather sent everyone in my family an email thanking them for the photo we got him. I'd bought the frame, edited the picture, and delivered it to him. All everyone else did was show up and complain while the picture was being taken. I'm the only one who didn't get a thank you email. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23500) - you deserved it (1327)
On 01/29/2012 at 10:01pm - misc - by the forgotten one (woman) - United States
Today, I arrived at the pizza place I work at to find that I'd been fired. Apparently, the class stoner came in last night and not only demanded a free pizza, but also claimed that I always gave him one. I've never talked to this kid in my life, but my boss still doesn't believe me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19780) - you deserved it (1342)
On 01/29/2012 at 9:36pm - work - by LowerCrust (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was standing in the bathroom and farted. It felt like someone stabbed me in the butt. I jumped out of shock, and my head slammed into the mirror. My glasses fell onto the floor and broke. I now need new glasses, a new mirror, and an ice pack for my head. All because I farted. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16070) - you deserved it (7260)
On 01/29/2012 at 8:27pm - health - by Rachal - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my girlfriend started a month-long period of not talking to me. One of her male friends, who is a self-styled astrologist, told her there are "bad omens" in our relationship for the coming weeks. I don't know if I should dump her for being gullible or just plain stupid. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18904) - you deserved it (2348)
On 01/29/2012 at 2:10pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (New York)
Today, I was cleaning my room and set my burnt out light bulb on my computer chair without any second thought. Later, I sat on the chair, the light bulb shattered and I got a huge gash on my butt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7697) - you deserved it (21943)
On 01/29/2012 at 12:50am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Idaho)
Today, I was going through airport security. Trying to get things over and done with quickly, I dropped my pants without a second thought. Turns out they just wanted me to remove my shoes and belt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6296) - you deserved it (20383)
On 01/28/2012 at 6:31pm - misc - by GothicbunnyxC (woman) - Canada (Prince Edward Island)
Today, I changed my relationship status on Facebook from "in a relationship" to "single." I forgot to take my phone to work, and when I got back, I saw someone had replied, "What happened?" Someone else commented, "He broke his hand." My ex and a bunch of other "friends" liked it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15151) - you deserved it (3069)
On 01/28/2012 at 4:52pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I just finished my first week of unemployment. I don't have any money. I also just finished the last toilet paper roll. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18063) - you deserved it (3291)
On 01/28/2012 at 12:58am - money - by INeedMoney - United States (Pennsylvania)
Monday 20 May 2013
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