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MacOSXpert

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MacOSXpert
  • Town/Country : 10.6.3 Expert Avenue, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1870
  • Number of comments : 75
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About MacOSXpert : I'm the MacOSXpert! 
But you can call me Macsy for short.
Not my real info of course!

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MacOSXpert's favorite FMLs

Today, I discovered that my boyfriend has been having an intimate text exchange with a woman. She's the grieving widow of his friend who died three weeks ago. FML

#17107042
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23621) - you deserved it (1650)

On 07/14/2011 at 11:53am - intimacy - by TheGoodTwin (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I had to bail my dad out of jail, for beating up my boyfriend, for sleeping with my mom. FML

#17089969
495 comments

I agree, your life sucks (105216) - you deserved it (5803)

On 07/13/2011 at 2:32am - intimacy - by whyme102008 - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend, who is very self conscious about her body, finally decided to have sex with me. She told me to wait a few minutes, so I did. I stripped and turned around to find her in a one-piece swimsuit, with a hole cut out of the crotch. FML

#17088739
423 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62957) - you deserved it (5691)

On 07/13/2011 at 1:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I finally had sex with the guy I've been flirting with for months. Immediately after he gave me the 'let's just be friends' speech then left for work, accidentally locking me in his apartment. I had to call his ex girlfriend to come let me out. She smirked. FML

#17080368
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24798) - you deserved it (8990)

On 07/12/2011 at 1:10pm - intimacy - by Anonanon (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I got home from work to find my house covered in graffiti dicks, the windows smashed, the front lawn entirely ripped up, and my letter box containing dog shit. I also found a note taped to the door saying, "Suck on this Darren". Darren is my next door neighbor. FML

#17063070
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51348) - you deserved it (2560)

On 07/11/2011 at 3:42am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my family got together to read my grandpa's will. He gave all of his grandkids $400 each. Except me. It seems he thought I'd see the funny side in being bequeathed a blow-up sex doll. FML

#17027029
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30405) - you deserved it (4145)

On 07/08/2011 at 11:10am - intimacy - by Jack - United States (Illinois)

Today, I overheard my boyfriend telling his friends about how great the sex was last night, and how he loves to "make a bitch bend over". We've been dating for 3 years, and haven't made love in several weeks. FML

#17023806
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37445) - you deserved it (5367)

On 07/08/2011 at 2:12am - intimacy - by Username - United States

Today, my wife actually had the balls to tell me that we can't have sex for the rest of her nine month pregnancy, because according to her, "I don't want twins." FML

#17004643
397 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34015) - you deserved it (9476)

On 07/06/2011 at 7:35pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend who was planning on waiting until marriage for sex decided to have sex with me. It's been 4 hours and she hasn't stopped crying, praying and calling me the devil's temptation. FML

#16998038
389 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46120) - you deserved it (14700)

On 07/06/2011 at 7:26am - intimacy - by devilboy - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I got stuck listening to my coworker bang on about how sexy her fiancé is for almost an hour. She told me about their sex life, described his dick in great detail, and showed me pictures of him shirtless. My coworker is 49; her fiancé is 56 and overweight. FML

#16985771
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34186) - you deserved it (3048)

On 07/05/2011 at 12:34pm - intimacy - by Jessie (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my son called me from medical school, asking for a new phone. Why? Because he dropped it in the toilet. How? Trying to videotape his anus while taking a dump. I pay $80,000 a year just to hear he took a dump on his phone. FML

#16966057
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33118) - you deserved it (4966)

On 07/03/2011 at 9:50pm - intimacy - by WasteOMoney - United States (Texas)

Today, while on student exchange in Germany, I was making myself a cup of coffee. When I rummaged around in the fridge, my room-mates asked me what I was looking for. I said I wanted to put "samen" in my coffee. They laughed. Ah yes, "sahne" means "cream". "Samen" means "sperm". FML

#16951443
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21239) - you deserved it (8050) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/02/2011 at 5:50pm - intimacy - by Hum - Switzerland (Ticino)

Today, I found out that my boyfriend was cheating on me. But not to worry, he said she's only in town for a week then he's done with her. FML

#16932993
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35738) - you deserved it (3026)

On 07/01/2011 at 4:49am - intimacy - by ljcxo17 - United States (Missouri)

Today, I got food poisoning and have had the worst diarrhea ever. I laid down in bed, hoping to get some rest when my dad thought it'd be a good idea to sneak into my room and scare the shit out of me. Literally. FML

#8910408
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25264) - you deserved it (1573)

On 03/08/2010 at 12:34am - misc - by itsEVERYWHERE (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, the guy that I have been seeing for over a year left on a business trip. While straightening out his room as a favor, I noticed he took his condoms with him. FML

#8892224
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20810) - you deserved it (2205)

On 03/07/2010 at 12:41pm - love - by Username - Sent from mobile version



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