MR_GUERR0

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MR_GUERR0

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 14392
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About MR_GUERR0 : I'm awesome and you are not just deal with it. Jk. I play competitive paintball and I like video games and football. Message me if you want :)

MR_GUERR0's page activity

Visits<b>mattzawesome</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 11:33pm<b>Terzy</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 11:32pm<b>jadeluv</b> - the 10/02/2013 at 4:34am<b>hunteryager</b> - the 09/05/2013 at 11:05am

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Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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MR_GUERR0's favorite FMLs

Today, a coworker at school yelled at one of our students to be quiet. The kid got pretty upset, so I went to comfort him. He held my hand for the rest of the class, telling me in vivid detail how he was going to kill my coworker. Now I'm afraid to look at him. FML

by Anonymous / 10/01/2013 at 12:36pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, while I was pet-sitting for my boyfriend's parents, one of their dogs killed one of their kittens. FML

by Anonymous / 09/30/2013 at 12:23pm / United States (Oregon) / Animals

Today, a stranger pulled me out of the path of a speeding taxicab. He then took one look at my face, said, "I should've left you there", and walked away. FML

by -__-" / 09/29/2013 at 1:45am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, we got my dad an iPad for his birthday. I had to repeatedly reassure him that he could in fact touch the screen without being shocked. FML

by Anonymous / 09/28/2013 at 5:40pm / New Zealand (Waikato) / Miscellaneous

Today, my insane war veteran great-uncle punched me in the throat for not laughing hard enough at his stupid joke. FML

by Anonymous / 09/28/2013 at 12:02am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I broke up with my abusive girlfriend. She responded by breaking into my place and stabbing my hamster with a fork. FML

by Anonymous / 09/27/2013 at 4:33pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, while sitting in a crowded waiting room at the doctor's office, my 5-year-old daughter pointed at my 6-year-old son's crotch and boomed, "MOM, WHY DOES ANDY HAVE A FINGER DOWN THERE?" to which he yelled, "IT'S CALLED A COCK!" FML

by SerenityJ / 09/27/2013 at 4:00pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, my mum dismissed my diagnosed schizophrenia as "too much time with those earphones in". FML

by awkwardology / 09/27/2013 at 3:56am / Australia (Queensland) / Health

Today, I watched in horror as my dad picked up a dead centipede, placed it on his tongue, and then swallowed it. FML

by Anonymous / 09/26/2013 at 12:19pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked in on my roommate whacking off to clown porn. FML

by Anonymous / 09/25/2013 at 5:33pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy

Today, I decided to be friendly and say hi to the weird kid at school, who was sitting by himself eating lunch. After I said hello, he stared up at me intensely and said, "I don't have many friends. Yeah. Mainly 'cause I've eaten most of them." FML

by scared shitless in ohio / 09/25/2013 at 4:02pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I invited my new girlfriend over for the first time. My roommate thought it would be funny to go on a porn site on my computer and leave it up. She saw it, freaked out, slapped me, and left. FML

by burb / 09/25/2013 at 3:23pm / Germany (Berlin) / Love

Today, I found out that the nice guy who comes to my workplace every morning to bring me a smoothie also makes a point of putting his knob in it before giving it to me. Also, all my coworkers knew about this and think it's hilarious. FML

by littledipper / 09/24/2013 at 11:51pm / United States (New York) / Work

Today, I sent a student to the dean for trying to smoke pot in my class. His mother called to complain that I publicly humiliated her son. FML

by chinaski7628 / 09/24/2013 at 6:00pm / United States (California) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I had to explain to my son why it is not okay to slap old women's butts. He's 16. FML

by mandm / 09/24/2013 at 5:01pm / United States (New York) / Kids