About Mr_guerr0
I'm awesome and you are not just deal with it. Jk. I play competitive paintball and I like video games and football. Message me if you want :)
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  • One more and it's business time

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Mr_guerr0's favorite FMLs

Today, my parents dropped by my new house, and my mother offered to tidy up for me while I was out. After they left, I noticed that her "tidying up" included throwing out all the pictures of my girlfriend and replacing them with pictures of herself. FML

By Anonymous - / Tuesday 15 October 2013 20:52 / United Kingdom - Stretham

Today, after months of exercise and diets and finally reaching my ideal weight, I told my morbidly obese cousin about my success, hoping to motivate him to do the same. He replied, "Why would it matter, you're still ugly." FML

By Anonymous - / Tuesday 15 October 2013 17:08 / United States - San Francisco

Today, at the pool, a kid no older than 8 was sitting on the diving board, not letting anyone else use it. I went over and tried to reason with him, but he wouldn't listen. My uncle stormed over, said "I got this!" and punted him over the edge. We both got thrown out for "bullying" the kid. FML

By JuggaloSlasher15 - / Thursday 8 August 2013 23:03 / United States

Today, I went to get an HPV vaccine after being convinced to by my mom. I stayed in the waiting room afterwards, because the vaccine has the possible side-effect of causing fainting. I didn't faint; instead, I spent the next 15 minutes giggling uncontrollably like a psycho. FML

By Anonymous / Tuesday 11 June 2013 18:41 / United States - Barrington

Today, my boyfriend was extremely nervous to meet my parents but I made him do it anyway. One of the first things out of his mouth was, "I'm glad you had sex." When they gave him a look of shock, he added, "You know, when you made your daughter! She's awesome!" FML

By lsababy - / Tuesday 11 June 2013 18:46 / United States - Muskegon