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Lucysky

Offline (the 01/30/2016 at 3:37am) | Search for a member

Lucysky

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2018
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Lucysky's favorite FMLs

Today, I donated blood. Afterwards, I regained consciousness on the floor with a half-eaten cookie in my mouth. FML

Today, I realized how amazing I've become at faking orgasms: I made up everything from the noises of my juices to pure, blissful climax over the phone to my husband. He came; I finished putting laundry away. FML

#20955991
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51003) - you deserved it (13443)

On 11/13/2013 at 1:40am - intimacy - by CanWeAllGetOne - United States (Texas)

Today, my father was taking pictures of my friend and me as we got ready for homecoming. After the pictures were taken, he offered to show us. He scrolled one picture too far and ended up showing us a picture of his penis. FML

#20927261
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64397) - you deserved it (4984)

On 10/20/2013 at 9:02am - intimacy - by Female_Lucifer (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my mom let me stay home from school, because I was sick. We both agreed not to tell my dad, since he's adamant that I never miss even one day of school. A few hours after my mom left for work, he came back home, with another woman. FML

#20925128
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71945) - you deserved it (3412)

On 10/18/2013 at 12:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, my husband and I switched phones by accident. I've already received several naked pictures from one of his co-workers. FML

#20898640
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63498) - you deserved it (4261)

On 09/28/2013 at 12:08am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was working the night shift when a guy came in smelling like alcohol. He kept muttering his order, so I leaned over the register to hear him better. My ear now smells of vomit. FML

#20897734
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40150) - you deserved it (4266)

On 09/27/2013 at 4:18am - work - by ihatethisjob - United States (Michigan)

Today, minutes before I walked down the aisle at my wedding, my drunk mother stumbled up to me and told me she was depressed and wanted to leave. FML

#20897339
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40476) - you deserved it (2471)

On 09/26/2013 at 9:32pm - misc - by notnow - United States

Today, even though I don't necessarily believe in soul mates, I found out my wife does. She met hers a few weeks ago. FML

#20896483
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45601) - you deserved it (3642)

On 09/26/2013 at 2:54am - love - by NotTheSoulMate (man) - United States

Today, a drunk man walked into my house at 2pm, screaming out, "Honey, I'm home!" He had the wrong house, but it looks like I've finally met my new neighbour. FML

#20895601
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39871) - you deserved it (3369)

On 09/25/2013 at 12:35pm - misc - by nicetomeetyou2 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my ex-wife put my number on Craigslist as a gay fashion designer needing a one night stand. I only found out when I got a text from an unknown number asking me when was the last time I "ate a black anaconda". FML

#20894419
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55234) - you deserved it (5266)

On 09/24/2013 at 2:12pm - intimacy - by Craigslist is Evil. - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my brother decided it would be funny for almost every sentence out of his mouth to start with the word "hashtag". FML

#20891806
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40052) - you deserved it (4249)

On 09/22/2013 at 5:21pm - kids - by soannoyed - United States

Today, being the prank couple that we are, I decided to mess with my husband. When he got off work, I said, "The lady from your office called and said she was pregnant. From you." He immediately broke down crying, and said, "I knew it." Turns out, my fetus already has a sibling. FML

#20889450
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69962) - you deserved it (6787)

On 09/20/2013 at 9:30pm - intimacy - by oops - United States (Texas)

Today, while riding the bus, the person next to me broke into a coughing fit. Fortunately, he covered his mouth. Unfortunately, he used my arm. FML

#20889355
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40878) - you deserved it (2774)

On 09/20/2013 at 7:58pm - misc - by -.- - United States (California)

Today, I walked in on my daughter shaving the testicles of her boyfriend, who had apparently snuck in through her window. FML

#20888905
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58017) - you deserved it (5907)

On 09/20/2013 at 12:30pm - intimacy - by disappointed (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my husband wanted me to "spice up" our sex life. I guess he didn't count on me vomiting when he came in my mouth. We won't be getting intimate again for a long, long time now. FML

#20888582
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51869) - you deserved it (11630)

On 09/20/2013 at 12:57am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)



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