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Today, after discovering that our son is already sexually active, I asked my husband to have a talk with him. "Remember, son, it's all about the clit", wasn't what I had in mind. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46680) - you deserved it (9483)
On 06/08/2013 at 6:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)
Today, I was on the tram, when an elderly couple got on. I stood up to give them room to sit together, but as I stood up, the tram set off and I went flying, knocking the elderly gentleman over. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43223) - you deserved it (3360)
On 06/05/2013 at 1:02pm - misc - by Bookworm (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, I got the bill for the flowers my husband arranged to be delivered to me while he's out of town next week. I also got the bill for the flowers he's sending to the floozy he'll be seeing next week while he's out of town. The gift tag for it was: "I can't wait to see you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (48112) - you deserved it (2763)
On 06/05/2013 at 1:02am - love - by Justme (woman) - United States (California)
Today, after finally seeing a psychologist about the death of my dad and spending the longest hour of my life confessing every thought I've experienced in the 6 years since his passing, my psychologist asked me if I was walking home or if my dad would be picking me up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (65623) - you deserved it (2788)
On 06/04/2013 at 8:35am - health - by irishbubble (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I witnessed a large woman pee on a pregnancy test in the middle of a Walmart parking lot, clean herself off, then wander around with the test hanging out of her mouth, waiting for her result. Where in the name of Christ do these people come from? FML
I agree, your life sucks (59203) - you deserved it (3292)
On 06/02/2013 at 2:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I had to eat up a few specks of toilet paper to avoid spoiling "the moment" with my girlfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51575) - you deserved it (10562)
On 05/29/2013 at 3:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, I was sending intimate pictures to my girlfriend and accidentally sent one to my best friend. He sent me one back. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44668) - you deserved it (26603)
On 05/28/2013 at 1:44am - intimacy - by Abrams52 (man) - United States (Indiana)
Today, a package was delivered to my house, addressed to me, clearly marked "sexual health products". Inside were condoms, birth control pills, and an invoice made out to me. My parents went ballistic and grounded me. Whoever staged this "hilarious" prank: well played. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51569) - you deserved it (3811)
On 05/24/2013 at 5:43pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Iceland (Eyjafjardarsysla)
Today, my friends and I were talking about the creepy stranger that used to stalk me back in high school. I guess his looks changed a lot through the years because I found out that he's my current boyfriend of 4 months. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50260) - you deserved it (15457)
On 05/24/2013 at 10:00am - love - by datgirl92 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was stuck in my apartment complex's elevator. I was shouting out for help when a voice came screaming, "This is the fire department." I was relieved until he said, "Just kidding." FML
I agree, your life sucks (41420) - you deserved it (2477)
On 05/23/2013 at 1:11am - misc - by Mylifesucks - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I walked in on my husband making out with his accountant, the same woman who comforted me when he cheated on me the year before. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46157) - you deserved it (15195)
On 05/20/2013 at 4:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I found out I was named after the woman my dad used to stalk when he was in high school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41563) - you deserved it (2452)
On 05/17/2013 at 5:25am - misc - by Jololol - United States
Today, while on an escalator, instead of just telling me my underwear label was hanging out of my jeans, a woman behind me decided to tuck the label in herself. You should never have to feel a stranger's finger on your butt crack. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45742) - you deserved it (4283)
On 05/16/2013 at 6:24am - misc - by violatedbuttcrack - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I saw a coin on the ground. As I bent over to pick it up, some dude came up from behind, grabbed my waist and humped me three times. He ran away before I could get a good look at his face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45852) - you deserved it (7969)
On 05/15/2013 at 4:08am - misc - by asdffhhjk (man) - Philippines (Manila)
Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk, except it wasn't really a talk, but rather him making me watch a hardcore porn video with him as he commented on what the actors were doing. I had to listen to all this and ignore his obvious erection for almost an hour. FML
I agree, your life sucks (64582) - you deserved it (3719)
On 05/13/2013 at 3:10pm - intimacy - by more than I wanted to know (man) - Italy (Emilia-Romagna)
Monday 17 June 2013
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