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About Lozinger : I have a great sense of humour, making people laugh is the best part of life.
I love the beach and going to clubs. I'm a self professed computer nerd. Nintendo 64 FTW : )
Completed High School, and beginning a double bachelors degree in Forensic Science and Criminology.
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Yesterday, I was on a bench enjoying the sun,hen a guy comes and sits next to me. Next thing I know, he lets out a loud fart, then looks way with pride. I stare back in shock. He then says to me, "Yeah, that just happend," and walks off. FML
TODAY..!! AT WORK..!! AN OLD LADY CAME TROUG MA LINE TO BUY SOME GROCERIES!! SE TOLD ME SE LOST ER PURSE AND WAS A LITTLE SORT!! IT WAS BUSY..!! SO I PULLED OUT MA LITTLE PURSE AND GAVE ER TE MONEY SE NEEDED!! A FEW MINUTE LATER SE RETURNED WIT MA BOSS..!! INSISTING TAT MA PURSE WAS ERS!! MEGA FML
Today, After A Few Months Of Mah Neighbors Friend Parking Outside His House An Honking Until He Cummed Outside, I Happened To Be Out Doing Lawn Work. I Politely Screamed ( STOP HONKING YOUR F***ING HORN! ) To Which They Responded By Moving In Front Of MY House An Holding Down Their Horn. I Hate People. FML
Today mah boyfriend of three yeres proposd to me . He brought me to our favorite restaurant and orderd expensive champagne . It was all very romantic until he got on one knee and I fartd out of surprise . Loudly .
Today, my husband discoverd that whispering anything in my ear will turn me on. He turnd to me an whisperd 'cheeseburger' in my ear. Unfortunately, I moand. Now he now laughs about it with our roommate. FML
Today, my boyfriend kept trying to convince me to do anal with him. After denying him several times he told me "Why it feels good, trust me." I asked him how would he know. There was a long awkward silencehen he then replied with "I'm not gay I swear."
Today I was at the parkhen I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me 4 six blocks. FML
Today... I Came Home And Saw On Our Fridge... "Please Don't Drink Anymore... I Really Worry About Yur Health" Written By Mah 7-year-old Daughter. I Figured She Wouldn't Ever Fine Out... So I Opened The Fridge. But I Found Another Note On A Can That Said "So Your Going To Drink Anyway?" FML
Today my son said "Mommy sometimes my pee-pee goes up like a stick." I replid "Well honey that's normal an okay." I then askd when it happens to which he said "Well sometimes when watching Scooby Doo an Shaggy comes out dressd in lady clothes." mega FML
Today, the kids I teach informed me that I had spelled mah name incorrectly on the board. I looked at it an assured them that I had spelled it correctly. I'm 22 an a graduate student, they're six an mentally challenged. Guess who was right? big fat FML
today mah husband dropped me off at work . Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby miss you" . I asked him about it . He said "I don't know wat you're talking about Megan" . My name isn't Megan . Not even close . FML
Friday 27 March 2015