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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I finally got a hold of my husband who I haven't actually talked to in 2 and 1/2 weeks since he is deployed and it's hard to chat. He told me he couldn't talk because he was in an epic battle, in Call of Duty. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22985) - you deserved it (3140)
On 12/07/2009 at 2:16pm - love - by Dejected (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I am lying next to my new husband. We went to Hawaii for our honeymoon and planned on spending the entire time in bed together. We succeeded in that goal, with both of us unable to leave each other's side for entire week. Sex? No. Food poisoning? Yes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30017) - you deserved it (1900)
On 11/28/2009 at 5:03pm - health - by IndieRox (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I woke up and looked in the mirror and noticed that my face was covered in glitter. I asked my wife about it and she said she put it on me while I was sleeping so that I would sparkle like Edward from Twilight when I'm in the sunlight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50275) - you deserved it (4863)
On 11/28/2009 at 12:32pm - love - by IB6UB9 - United States
Today, I realized that I am dating a 25 year old man-child. He turns 13 whenever he sees my boobs, complete with big eyes and saying "honk honk" whenever he touches them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26900) - you deserved it (7681)
On 11/28/2009 at 11:17am - love - by moon_paw (woman) - United States (South Carolina)
Today, I kissed my iced over window to know what kissing Edward Cullen would be like. My neighbor saw. My first reaction was to come up with a cover story. I licked the window and wiped my sleeve over it to look like I was cleaning it. My neighbor came over later and gave me an early Christmas gift. Windex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4484) - you deserved it (56733)
On 11/27/2009 at 12:12am - misc - by obsessed (woman) - United States (Iowa)
Today, I drove three and a half hours to surprise my long distance boyfriend for our anniversary. He was out of town. Where was he? Three and a half hours away trying to surprise me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34645) - you deserved it (5742)
On 11/04/2009 at 4:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (South Carolina)
Today, I got to my apartment early after being out really late the night before. Maybe next time I should call ahead of time so that my roommate has time to sneak my girlfriend out of his bedroom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34060) - you deserved it (1850)
On 11/02/2009 at 6:05am - love - by ZPyRoGoDz (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I realized that the drunk-me deletes my texts, so the sober-me doesn't get mad. Well turns out, whatever the drunk-me said, caused me to lose my job, my girlfriend, and my coffee machine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8768) - you deserved it (32725)
On 11/01/2009 at 11:35am - misc - by Joe (man) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I tried to surprise my boyfriend over webcam with a cute negligee. He was doing homework. Half an hour later, he finally noticed. Apparently pre-calc is more interesting than his girlfriend. I guess polynomials are just curvier than me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11975) - you deserved it (24846)
On 10/07/2009 at 12:39am - love - by NotAParabola (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. I found out he was seeing someone behind my back: my ex-boyfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40983) - you deserved it (3399)
On 10/03/2009 at 7:43am - love - by Anon (woman) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)
Today, I was taking a group shot with my friends when I asked a stranger to take the picture for us. He backed up and told us to squish closer together, and when he was at least 20 feet away, he turned and ran off with my camera. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23029) - you deserved it (11742)
On 10/02/2009 at 7:32pm - money - by jacked (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was woken up from a nap by my cat attacking my face. Evidently, my husband thought it would be funny to shine a laser pointer on my cheek. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24744) - you deserved it (2035)
On 10/02/2009 at 6:23pm - love - by Zamaria - Sent from mobile version
Today, I was fired for not attending a mandatory meeting. I confronted my boss and told her I never heard anything about it, she told me that daily reminders had been sent out via email for weeks. She then discovered that she failed to enter my email address in the system. I was still fired. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38909) - you deserved it (1637)
On 10/02/2009 at 5:31pm - work - by Rae (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was curious as to whether or not my mom was off of her medication. When I asked her, she pulled a knife on me. Looks like I got my answer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38510) - you deserved it (3010)
On 08/29/2009 at 12:46pm - health - by mommy_issues (man) - United States (South Carolina)
Today, my girlfriend updated her Facebook status when I was with her. No, let me correct myself. Today, my girlfriend updated her Facebook status when I was in her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59174) - you deserved it (7991)
On 08/16/2009 at 2:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
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