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Judgmental
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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today, my daughter somehow got a hold of the lighter we keep on top of the fridge. I found this out when she snuck up behind me and thought it would be fun to set my hair on fire. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22534) - you deserved it (3885)
On 08/01/2011 at 12:28am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)
Today, after watching Insidious, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to scare me while I was on the toilet. I was in mid-piss when he jumped out at me, and I ran screaming and peeing down the hall. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35249) - you deserved it (7731)
On 07/21/2011 at 5:24pm - love - by toni405 - United States
Today, I dropped my urine sample on my pants. Not only do I now not have a sample, it looks like I pissed myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20622) - you deserved it (6857)
On 03/08/2011 at 1:23pm - health - by caqi33 - United States
Today, while stocking shelves with canned goods, a kid no older than ten ran down the aisle, knocking down everything in his path. He was followed by his mother who was laughing hysterically. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23569) - you deserved it (1867)
On 02/04/2011 at 3:13pm - work - by Anonymous - United States
Today, after suffering from constipation for three days, I finally took a dump. Just as things reached the point of no return, my land line and doorbell all rang. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17662) - you deserved it (2066)
On 01/29/2011 at 1:06am - health - by Poopie (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, after staying up all night at my friend's house, I woke up to something I couldn't identify on my cheek, so I slapped it away. When I heard crying, I opened my eyes and realized it was my friend's three year old sister who was trying to be sweet by kissing me on the cheek. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24223) - you deserved it (10511)
On 01/14/2011 at 1:22pm - misc - by ash (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I had to walk three miles home from work. Both my parents were at home. The reason they wouldn't collect me is apparently because I've "gotten so fat, your grandma cried after she saw you". FML
I agree, your life sucks (14669) - you deserved it (16214)
On 01/07/2011 at 12:46am - health - by biscuit (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, my six year old told me I have a big nose. When I told her that she hurt my feelings, she laughed and said "Don't be silly mummy, ugly people don't have feelings." FML
I agree, your life sucks (91412) - you deserved it (10764)
On 12/14/2010 at 3:21am - kids - by uglywoman - Australia (Queensland)
Today, without even trying, I convinced my 17-year-old daughter that blueberries are just peas holding their breath. I have raised a complete airhead. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30253) - you deserved it (49769)
On 12/11/2010 at 9:44am - kids - by parentfail (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, I told my parents that I wanted a little brother. My dad apparently thought it would be funny to tell me that my mom just swallowed my little brother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47344) - you deserved it (6502)
On 11/13/2010 at 2:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I was sitting on a bench enjoying the sun, when a guy came and sat next to me. Next thing I know, he farts loudly, then proudly looks my way. I stared back in shock. He says to me, "Yeah, that just happened," and walks off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49156) - you deserved it (9961)
On 11/03/2010 at 3:27am - misc - by flying13 (woman) - United States (Nevada)
Today, I went to a school football game alone. I sat next to these hot girls. To seem cool, I picked up my phone and had a fake conversation with the coolest guy in the grade. Halfway through, he came over and talked to the girls. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5425) - you deserved it (48106)
On 09/11/2010 at 12:01am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I came home to my wife crying. She had mixed up our newborn twin girls and couldn't tell which was which. I looked at the girls. Neither could I. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42874) - you deserved it (6018)
Today, I was helping my friend create an online dating profile. When she got her search results, her #1 match was a blonde guy only 10 miles from her. His description: genuine, laid back, and ready for fun. He left off something kind of important. He's already married. To me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (83403) - you deserved it (4747)
On 07/19/2010 at 1:36pm - love - by betrayed (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I lost my phone. I tried to call it using my husband's phone, but couldn't figure out which of the three Kates in the contact list was me. Turns out, two are co-workers and one is his aunt. I was listed under Satan. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33046) - you deserved it (6591)
On 03/15/2010 at 7:22pm - love - by Satan (woman) - United States (Washington)
Monday 20 May 2013
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