Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?

LizzJizz

Search for a member

LizzJizz
  • Town/Country : Fontana, LizzJizz
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 21 December 1992 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 1152
  • Number of comments : 233
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About LizzJizz : Right, well I'm 4'ft'10.
Reside here in California.
Do enjoy a good conversation, easily amused.
Down for pretty much anything, love to have fun
Live a Fast Life, I'm an adventurous lil person
Type 1 Juvenile Diabetic
Love to socialize, so lets be buds?
I'm a pitbull advocate and love bully breeds
I currently own 2 apbts & a Rescued pit lab mix.

LizzJizz's last visitors

anne90210Devilpie666ajax_unitedSydneyRose27obeykiddsmallsMornaiborn_hustlaTcaret300LaxinitupaardvarkishNeut

LizzJizz's FML badges

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of LizzJizz's badges

LizzJizz's favorite FMLs

Today, I went on a date with a seemingly nice guy I met online. He was drunk when I got there. Within the first 10 minutes, he had told me I was "like Hitler but with boobs", and I was "offensive to the ninja community." Then he said I just wasn't all he had hoped for and left. FML

#17255469
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24446) - you deserved it (5606)

On 07/25/2011 at 3:24pm - misc - by ninja_blasphemer (woman) - Ireland (Wexford)

Today, yep, pubic hair is still flammable. FML

#17253046
365 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10318) - you deserved it (51544)

On 07/25/2011 at 11:12am - health - by Smokey9 - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend told me my vagina looks like an old man in a hat. It's OK though, he said it was a nice hat. FML

#17187875
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33008) - you deserved it (4819)

On 07/20/2011 at 5:17am - intimacy - by growlr - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I found out my boyfriend has checked every girl he has ever slept with for 'vagina teeth'. I'm apparently no exception. FML

#17184971
379 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30833) - you deserved it (4835)

On 07/20/2011 at 12:40am - intimacy - by knolan - United States

Today, my sister was on shrooms. I wasn't able to tackle her before she called the cops to say that her books were trying to eat her face off. FML

#16932520
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25472) - you deserved it (2575)

On 07/01/2011 at 3:41am - misc - by ugh annoying - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my father decided to "prepare" me for the real world by telling me that I'm ugly. FML

#16642702
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35129) - you deserved it (4461)

On 06/13/2011 at 10:22am - misc - by suze44 - United States (Washington)

Today, I dreamed that I was making out with a cute girl. Just as I was about to take it to the next level, she suddenly burst into tears and said, "I'm sorry, I can't do this." I can't even get laid in my dreams. FML

#16609106
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48843) - you deserved it (6332)

On 06/11/2011 at 10:24am - intimacy - by Ryan - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I sent my boyfriend a long and heartfelt message. He responded with "tl; dr". FML

#16540181
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21247) - you deserved it (4654)

On 06/07/2011 at 12:43am - love - by Maddie110110 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I thought it would be hot if I sent my boyfriend kinky message. He didn't reply so I sent a few more. 10 minutes later I got a reply saying, "Honey, this is his mom and you should be a little less desperate." FML

#16510507
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16624) - you deserved it (38911)

On 06/05/2011 at 3:23am - intimacy - by yup - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend and I went shooting. While I was showing him how to properly hold and adjust a rifle, he accidentally pulled the trigger. The gun kicked back and hit me in the face, breaking my nose. FML

#16467969
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25886) - you deserved it (7622)

On 06/02/2011 at 1:32pm - health - by raebelle - United States

Today, I walked in on my mom trying to wax her butt. FML

#16351736
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38454) - you deserved it (4703)

On 05/26/2011 at 12:15am - intimacy - by blahblah493 - United States

Today, my boyfriend refused to go down on me because I smelled of baby lotion and it made him feel like a child molester. FML

#16263681
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32692) - you deserved it (11394)

On 05/20/2011 at 4:40am - intimacy - by skiittlez713 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I skipped school and stayed home without telling my parents. My mom came home on her lunch break with another man, and had sex in our living room. I'm stuck in my room, listening to my mom cheat on my dad. FML

#16168666
366 comments

I agree, your life sucks (91553) - you deserved it (9961)

On 05/14/2011 at 7:15am - intimacy - by ali grace - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up so pissed off that I yelled at my cereal. FML

#16128268
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28353) - you deserved it (13125)

On 05/11/2011 at 10:33am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, the only person who wished me a happy birthday is the policeman who checked my identity card for being "suspiciously gangster-like". FML

#15976359
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28201) - you deserved it (4001)

On 04/29/2011 at 10:00am - misc - by Jims (man) - Singapore



Max Grünfeld's illustrated FML

Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Worst Sisters Ever
  • Growing up with a sister can be a good thing. If you're a guy, it can teach you about girls and how to interact with them so you won't grow up to be a sexist idiot who's afraid of women and who can only…

Monday 17 June 2013

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: