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LiznessMonster

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LiznessMonster

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 24 April 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3467
  • Number of comments : 146
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About LiznessMonster : I don't have anything to go right here, but any questions I can answer!

LiznessMonster's page activity

Visits<b>missalyssaxo</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 9:41pm<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 4:11am<b>abdiG</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 8:39pm<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 8:15am<b>miztigers53</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 8:51pm<b>shivamtrivedi</b> - the 02/18/2014 at 11:11am<b>toasty_narwals</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 11:24am<b>thedeadmen</b> - the 12/31/2013 at 6:33am<b>starlight300</b> - the 11/23/2013 at 9:10pm<b>DERPYDERP878</b> - the 11/21/2013 at 8:46pm<b>greeneyebeauty9</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 12:40pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 10/18/2013 at 4:39am<b>ctuan13</b> - the 10/03/2013 at 10:30am<b>metsandcavs</b> - the 10/02/2013 at 8:03pm<b>donttakemytacos</b> - the 09/25/2013 at 9:34am<b>mariepastyglue</b> - the 08/25/2013 at 1:29pm<b>IHATEFMYLIFE</b> - the 08/10/2013 at 1:12am<b>disasterlydeed</b> - the 08/10/2013 at 12:45am

LiznessMonster's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of LiznessMonster's badges

LiznessMonster's favorite FMLs

Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping the dog back asserted dominance. Well, I decided to, and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said "How do you like that!" And then my mom walked in. FML

#2026481
435 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31909) - you deserved it (141209)

On 05/17/2009 at 7:40pm - animals - by sucks (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, after spending the night hanging out with a beautiful girl we start to walk back to my place. Halfway there she turns and says, "I wish you were a vampire" and goes back home. FML

#1834550
641 comments

I agree, your life sucks (91815) - you deserved it (8372)

On 05/11/2009 at 1:12am - intimacy - by Hallllo (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I flew to see my long distance boyfriend who I haven't seen in 6 months. Upon seeing me, he ran up to me, picked me up and swung me around like they do in the movies. In doing so, my foot hit a 4 year old child who was running past and knocked him out. FML

#1815413
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75360) - you deserved it (8409)

On 05/10/2009 at 2:49pm - love - by airport (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was serving a family at the restaurant where I work. When I went to ask the little girl what she wanted, I was tongue-tied and got "cutie" and "hun" mixed up and ended up asking, "What can I get for you, cuntie?" FML

#1751488
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76725) - you deserved it (23384)

On 05/08/2009 at 4:53pm - work - by keeks_25 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after practicing a song for my girlfriend on guitar all day, I called her over to my house to show it to her. After a long speech about how "this is for you," I played for about 3 seconds before I broke a string, which slapped her in her face. FML

#1694711
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63461) - you deserved it (5729)

On 05/06/2009 at 4:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, I was driving to the grocery store with my 7 year-old son. When I was approaching a stop sign, I look next to me and see a guy with a triangle shaped head. I tell my son "Look at the guy with the triangle head." My window was open. So was his. FML

#1587848
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7846) - you deserved it (65367)

On 05/03/2009 at 9:44am - misc - by mylifesucks123 (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I woke up with really dry, chapped lips. Still in bed, without my glasses on, I sleepily reached down into my purse for some chapstick and applied it. Upon awakening later I realized I had mistaken a mini Sharpie permanent marker for chapstick. I have a job interview today. FML

#1100061
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43669) - you deserved it (26943)

On 04/18/2009 at 9:55pm - misc - by pinkblankets (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, at a family Seder, (a Jewish service for Passover), my mom served matzah balls during the festive meal. Considering how much I love matzah balls and there aren't many options for me to eat because I'm a vegetarian, I shouted, "I like really big balls!" in front of my entire family. FML

#921004
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18338) - you deserved it (88090)

On 04/12/2009 at 12:27am - intimacy - by anon13 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, at lunch I was running to my group's table with my friend. She accidentally tripped me, and I slid across the café floor face first on my belly. The whole cafeteria was silent. They then broke out in hysterics when the head janitor ran up to me and yelled 'SAFE!' like a baseball umpire. FML

#877965
260 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65297) - you deserved it (10929)

On 04/08/2009 at 9:42pm - misc - by eun (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

#836792
925 comments

I agree, your life sucks (346934) - you deserved it (38551)

On 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by creepermagnet (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, it was really windy and rainy causing me to trip and knock into a little kid. While still gathering myself, I apologized and patted the kid on its' head. Then I see people around me starting to laugh. I turn and look at the kid, and discover I've been interacting with a trash can. FML

#832092
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26019) - you deserved it (47686)

On 04/06/2009 at 7:47am - kids - by trashcanned (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I fell asleep in class. As a joke, my professor used an airhorn to wake me up. I got so freaked out that I punched the girl next to me in the face. She got knocked out. FML

#553935
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84120) - you deserved it (31438)

On 03/23/2009 at 3:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I came home and saw on our fridge, "Please don't drink anymore, I really worry about your health" written by my 7-year-old daughter. I figured she wouldn't ever find out, so I opened the fridge. But I found another note on a can that said "So you're going to drink anyway?" FML

#503348
872 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58548) - you deserved it (621788)

On 03/21/2009 at 12:46am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I got to my underground parking garage at work and saw my boss pulling into a spot. I thought I would show him my reverse parking skills and decided to park beside him. As I was pulling in he opened his door to get out and I smashed into it, nearly running him over. FML

#488683
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14771) - you deserved it (64063)

On 03/20/2009 at 1:11pm - work - by mikej1985 (man) - Canada (Ontario)



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