Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

LiznessMonster

Search for a member

LiznessMonster

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 24 April 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3463
  • Number of comments : 146
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About LiznessMonster : I don't have anything to go right here, but any questions I can answer!

LiznessMonster's page activity

Visits<b>missalyssaxo</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 9:41pm<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 4:11am<b>abdiG</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 8:39pm<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 8:15am<b>miztigers53</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 8:51pm<b>shivamtrivedi</b> - the 02/18/2014 at 11:11am<b>toasty_narwals</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 11:24am<b>thedeadmen</b> - the 12/31/2013 at 6:33am<b>starlight300</b> - the 11/23/2013 at 9:10pm<b>DERPYDERP878</b> - the 11/21/2013 at 8:46pm<b>greeneyebeauty9</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 12:40pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 10/18/2013 at 4:39am<b>ctuan13</b> - the 10/03/2013 at 10:30am<b>metsandcavs</b> - the 10/02/2013 at 8:03pm<b>donttakemytacos</b> - the 09/25/2013 at 9:34am<b>mariepastyglue</b> - the 08/25/2013 at 1:29pm<b>IHATEFMYLIFE</b> - the 08/10/2013 at 1:12am<b>disasterlydeed</b> - the 08/10/2013 at 12:45am

LiznessMonster's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of LiznessMonster's badges

LiznessMonster's favorite FMLs

Today, I was walking to the shops when I saw my friend about 10 metres in front of me, waiting at the traffic lights, by herself. Jokingly, I shouted out "Who's that really ugly person waiting at the lights?" The girl turned around. It wasn't my friend. FML

#14879534
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9663) - you deserved it (39494)

On 02/07/2011 at 6:43am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, in the middle of the night, my girlfriend whispered "Are you asleep?" I chose not to respond, to see what she'd do. She then let rip a loud, stinking fart, giggled, and went back to sleep. FML

#14610611
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14020) - you deserved it (36206) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, I was getting it on with my boyfriend. I started to come, screaming, "Ah... ah... ah... AHH!" To which he added, "Staying alive! Staying alive!" FML

#14608705
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30651) - you deserved it (19919) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 1:24am - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, I'm 19 years old and, having never been on a date, I agreed to let my friend set me up. He was adorable, young, with blond hair and blue eyes...and 4 years old. My friend tricked me into babysitting. FML

#14596277
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31678) - you deserved it (4121)

On 01/16/2011 at 12:20am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arkansas)

Today, my daughter was expelled from her school for beating another kindergartener with a Dr. Seuss book. FML

#14567167
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33059) - you deserved it (6997)

On 01/13/2011 at 3:48pm - kids - by me - United States

Today, feeling melancholy, I took a blanket out to the backyard and lay down to look at the clouds. My dad came out to ask me what I was doing. I told him, he smirked, squatted over my face, and farted. He then ran back inside and told my mom. She laughed. FML

#14490240
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28387) - you deserved it (5618)

On 01/06/2011 at 9:45pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was out running. All of a sudden I saw a dog come towards me, I thought it was going to attack me and I screamed like a girl in front of everyone. It was a puppy wanting to play. FML

#14467697
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8049) - you deserved it (27498)

On 01/04/2011 at 9:44pm - animals - by BIZZMAL - United States

Today, I was in a store with my dad. He completely lost his temper and began yelling at the store owners. For some reason, he then removed his shirt in protest. FML

#14309461
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32768) - you deserved it (2638)

On 12/23/2010 at 9:48am - misc - by Username - Canada

Today, after receiving a lovely massage from my boyfriend, I was lying topless in bed beside him. Just as I was thinking this would be the perfect opportunity for some intimacy, he looks at me and says, "my mom is SO awesome." FML

#14128244
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30057) - you deserved it (3468)

On 12/08/2010 at 3:22am - intimacy - by ooblie (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I planned to drop a water balloon on my visiting prankster brother from my new apartment's balcony. As he crossed the street, I launched the balloon, and sent it right behind him. It hit an eight year old on a scooter. FML

#14126136
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7502) - you deserved it (31177)

On 12/07/2010 at 11:20pm - misc - by bullseyed (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went to see a famous rapper perform. My girlfriend got us up to the front to get pictures with him. He went to give me a high-five, I thought it was a fist-bump, so I made a fist. So he made a fist while I made a palm to match his retracted high-five. Then I panicked, cupped his fist and ran. FML

#13986029
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11876) - you deserved it (27442)

On 11/26/2010 at 10:43am - misc - by blackitalian - United States

Today, my grandma walked into my room and asked if the thing lying on my nightstand was a computer. I said ''Grandma, that's a clock.'' After staring at me, confused for a few seconds, she then farted, and left my room. FML

#13949092
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40471) - you deserved it (5370)

On 11/23/2010 at 12:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to use the public restroom. As I saw the toilet paper was out, I could see there was some hanging down from the other stall. As I went to grab it, I felt a hand grab mine and a voice ask seductively, "what were you reaching for?" FML

#13940137
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26628) - you deserved it (9058)

On 11/22/2010 at 7:18pm - misc - by reesemaster (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, in the wee hours of the morning I decided to make a naked dash to the bathroom, unfortunately, my dad decided to do the same thing at the exact same time. FML

#13874873
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35201) - you deserved it (8901)

On 11/17/2010 at 8:26am - misc - by mydadsawsooomuch (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I volunteered to help out at an elementary school. I accidentally elbowed a little girl in the face while playing tag. And an hour later, a little boy flew out of his swing because I accidentally pushed him too hard. They're both siblings and are my child psychology instructor's kids. FML

#13849266
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23745) - you deserved it (8117)

On 11/15/2010 at 2:26am - work - by Anonymous -



FML's blog

  • Jim Trim's Illustrated FML
  • Action stations! I'm back from my holiday, I've got some sort of weirdly uneven tan and I already want to go back to the beach to bum about and finish off my colouring book. But I can't. I'm still…

Friday 29 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: