Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

LiznessMonster

Search for a member

LiznessMonster

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 24 April 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3891
  • Number of comments : 146
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About LiznessMonster : I don't have anything to go right here, but any questions I can answer!

LiznessMonster's page activity

Visits<b>no_playa_hater</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 10:38am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 1:40pm<b>Kasanovastar</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 5:05pm<b>missalyssaxo</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 9:41pm<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 4:11am<b>abdiG</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 8:39pm<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 8:15am<b>miztigers53</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 8:51pm<b>shivamtrivedi</b> - the 02/18/2014 at 11:11am<b>toasty_narwals</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 11:24am<b>thedeadmen</b> - the 12/31/2013 at 6:33am<b>starlight300</b> - the 11/23/2013 at 9:10pm<b>DERPYDERP878</b> - the 11/21/2013 at 8:46pm<b>greeneyebeauty9</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 12:40pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 10/18/2013 at 4:39am<b>ctuan13</b> - the 10/03/2013 at 10:30am<b>metsandcavs</b> - the 10/02/2013 at 8:03pm<b>donttakemytacos</b> - the 09/25/2013 at 9:34am

LiznessMonster's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of LiznessMonster's badges

LiznessMonster's favorite FMLs

Today, my parents had a long discussion on whether a cut on my arm looked like a vagina. FML

#18921223
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25107) - you deserved it (2615)

On 01/26/2012 at 11:07pm - misc - by HylianFox (woman) - United States

Today, I waited on an elderly man whose wife had just left him. After him going on and on about how his dog will love his leftover chicken, I nervously caught a case of verbal diarrhea and uttered, "Well, if there's chicken involved, I'll get on my knees and be your dog." FML

#18886717
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9268) - you deserved it (30649)

On 01/23/2012 at 12:12am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I found out that when you are sitting on a full bench at a bus stop, some crazy person will come sit on you. FML

#18857605
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23816) - you deserved it (2588)

On 01/19/2012 at 10:46pm - misc - by BadassRumbleroar - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I turned on the news to see a live report about an increase in crime in my town. One minute in, my drunk daughter appears behind the news reporter, butt naked, dancing. FML

#18845928
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38746) - you deserved it (6178)

On 01/18/2012 at 5:30pm - misc - by MakesMeLol (man) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I tried to give my friend a fist bump. He thought I was trying to punch him so he punched me in the face. FML

#18785359
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25292) - you deserved it (4843)

On 01/12/2012 at 2:24pm - misc - by Anon (man) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, while helping my father build a shelf, I suggested that we should probably use the instruction manual. He suggested I should probably shut the fuck up and do it his way. FML

#18738481
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26929) - you deserved it (14005)

On 01/07/2012 at 7:12pm - misc - by Jman6295 (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was boarding a plane and an elderly woman asked if I could put her carry on into the overhead bin. Eager to help, I energetically lifted her bag up, and smacked her in the face with it. FML

#18722642
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27848) - you deserved it (5591)

On 01/06/2012 at 12:47am - misc - by plantfood - United States

Today, I was on the train listening to my iPod on shuffle. The "Oompa Loompa" song came on, and slightly amused, I started humming it. It wasn't until I noticed that the man next to me was a midget that I understood the horrified looks I was getting. FML

#18716043
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33195) - you deserved it (9189)

On 01/05/2012 at 1:39pm - misc - by lorahayes (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I accidentally moaned my own name during sex. FML

#18703291
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31761) - you deserved it (27433)

On 01/04/2012 at 1:43am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my daughter brought her new boyfriend over for dinner. I realize now why she said we would get along great: we graduated high school together. FML

#18689614
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43733) - you deserved it (3173)

On 01/02/2012 at 8:10pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I found out my girlfriend starts fights with me over text because apparently, when I'm arguing with someone, I stop speaking in "annoying shorthand" and am grammatically correct. FML

#18645768
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8951) - you deserved it (33682)

On 12/29/2011 at 5:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, a friend told me over MSN that her father had died. Trying to express some solidarity, I went to send her a tearful smiley. I accidentally sent her the dancing pig animation instead. FML

#18644636
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17514) - you deserved it (27094) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/29/2011 at 2:32pm - misc - by Kevin - France

Today, I was working on the computer when my dad walks in, pointing his finger at me like a gun. Before I could even ask, it turns out he was aiming a rubber band at me. The doctor says I'll be able to take off my eye patch in a couple of days. FML

#18549843
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29387) - you deserved it (2232)

On 12/19/2011 at 12:03am - health - by suhleedah18 - United States

Today, I had a dream in which I was arguing with my mom. In the dream, she threatened to hit me, and I told her I'd do it myself. I reared back and knocked the crap out of myself. I'm awake now, and my jaw still hurts. FML

#18519378
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22516) - you deserved it (5295)

On 12/15/2011 at 12:30pm - misc - by Grubendol - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I went to eat the orange I'd brought to work, but couldn't find it. After minutes searching, I found it. Nailed to the ceiling. FML

#18517264
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25754) - you deserved it (2543)

On 12/15/2011 at 1:57am - work - by Username - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • Cynthia's illustrated FML
  • TFIF indeed. It's time to kick off the suit and tie and forget about work. Some of us are going out for drinks with friends, others are going to enjoy some live music and some brave fools are going to keep fit…

Friday 28 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: