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Lioness8197

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Lioness8197
  • Town/Country : Florida
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2935
  • Number of comments : 97
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 13 posted

About Lioness8197 : I love reading and writing.

I love to longboard.

I want a Great Dane and German Shepherd.

I love baseball and football.

Lions are my favorite animal.

I'm a Leo.

I want to become a baker and one day own a bakery that I can call mine.

I'm a very respectful person. Don't assume because I'm a teenager I'm rude, disrespectful and inconsiderate.

Lioness8197's last visitors

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Lioness8197's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

One ring to rule them all

You submitted an FML that was successfully published on the website. This makes you an exceptional human being.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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Lioness8197's favorite FMLs

Today, I hooked up with the guy I've liked for a while, even though my friends joked that his large pickup truck meant that he was "compensating" for having a small penis. They were right. Very right. FML

#20876171
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47266) - you deserved it (9472)

On 09/10/2013 at 8:14pm - intimacy - by CityBoysNow - United States (Missouri)

Today, my roommate unexpectedly came home with a new puppy. I'm severely allergic to dogs. When I reminded her of this, she explained that the puppy was her family now and if I didn't like it I should move out because blood is thicker than water. My roommate is my sister. FML

#20875920
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42642) - you deserved it (2369)

On 09/10/2013 at 5:02pm - animals - by RoommateWanted (woman) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, I took my 4-year-old son to the bank with me. He asked why we were going, and I explained that I had a couple of checks that they would turn into money. When we got in line, he loudly exclaimed that "Mommy has checks for money!" Except "checks" sounded almost exactly like "sex". FML

#20875776
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45019) - you deserved it (3820)

On 09/10/2013 at 2:30pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my mom was sharing the story of how I was born with the umbilical cord around my neck. My sister added that it was God's first attempt to kill me off. FML

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me through my birthday card. FML

#20871364
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59946) - you deserved it (3471)

On 09/07/2013 at 12:08pm - love - by brycepetrillo - United States (Florida)

Today, my best friend confessed to me that she's a lesbian. She quickly added, "Oh, don't worry, I don't like you. You're not attractive." FML

#20871260
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48264) - you deserved it (4050)

On 09/07/2013 at 10:17am - misc - by ...thanks (woman) - United States

Today, I came home to find my housemate cowering in the lounge corner, sobbing hysterically, hugging a bag of chips while the automatic vacuum cleaner gently bumped into him. Apparently he "mistakenly" put magic mushrooms in his sandwich instead of peanut butter. FML

#20868509
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36095) - you deserved it (2463)

On 09/05/2013 at 3:45am - misc - by down trodden (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I realized that I have a rack and butt most girls would be jealous of. That wouldn't be bad if I wasn't a dude. FML

Today, I had to bail my brother out of jail after he punched a convenience store clerk in the face for running out of Cheetos. FML

#20867149
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37479) - you deserved it (3181)

On 09/04/2013 at 3:00am - kids - by ven980 - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my loneliness reached a new level when I befriended the fly in my apartment, Mr. Stickyfoot. FML

#20866691
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33700) - you deserved it (6131)

On 09/03/2013 at 9:32pm - misc - by JustAnotherFML23 (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my new creative writing teacher informed the class that we should consult him before writing anything "dark or disturbing." I only took the class because my therapist recommended that I join the class so I could freely express my darker thoughts without her help or a fear of being judged. FML

#20866346
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33062) - you deserved it (2413)

On 09/03/2013 at 5:43pm - misc - by depressed (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was at the doctor's getting a check up. He asked me if I was allergic to anything, to which I blurted out, "Cats." He gave me a weird look and said, "Don't worry, I won't give you cats." FML

#20865755
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36377) - you deserved it (5901)

On 09/03/2013 at 4:17am - health - by NoNotCats =^._.^= (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I caught my sister eating crayons. She's 19. FML

#20858152
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35832) - you deserved it (2343)

On 08/28/2013 at 5:29pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I asked my mom if I was ugly. She said, "Ask your girlfriend." I said I don't have one. She said "Exactly." FML

#20855163
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45220) - you deserved it (4409)

On 08/26/2013 at 2:22pm - misc - by Miami6and3 - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I were discussing sports injuries, and I mentioned that I pulled a muscle in my crotch last year. He snorted and called me a clueless idiot because according to him, "girls don't have crotches". He's a med student. I sense malpractice lawsuits in our future. FML

#20850902
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41199) - you deserved it (3222)

On 08/23/2013 at 2:21pm - misc - by fucking financial ruin (woman) - United States (North Carolina)



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