Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?

Lioness8197

Search for a member

Lioness8197
  • Town/Country : Florida
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1090
  • Number of comments : 85
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About Lioness8197 : I love to longboard.

I want a Great Dane and German Shepherd.

I love baseball and football.

Lions are my favorite animal.

I'm a Leo.

I want to become a baker and one day own a bakery that I can call mine.

I'm a very respectful person. Don't assume because I'm a teenager I'm rude, disrespectful and inconsiderate.

Lioness8197's last visitors

LiiaaBeePorceifuzz97CatfishMike29neeni88BakarraihaveasushicatMysteryManPersonbotanistjessicathebestintheworlTheManager

Lioness8197's FML badges

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of Lioness8197's badges

Lioness8197's favorite FMLs

Today, a woman strapped her 8-year-old son into the seat next to me on a transatlantic flight. Thinking they'd been unable to book seats together, I offered to swap seats with her. She said she'd booked it this way intentionally, because he's a "fucking brat" on flights. She was right. FML

#20513411
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36214) - you deserved it (1547)

On 02/19/2013 at 12:13pm - kids - by Sigh (man) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I met my mother's deeply religious fiancé for the first time. His response upon seeing me was to look me square in the eye and say, "You'll need to take out that nose stud or I'm afraid you'll not be welcome in our home." FML

#20513141
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29379) - you deserved it (2730)

On 02/19/2013 at 2:55am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I walked into my dad straightening my dog's fur. His excuse? The dog needed to feel pretty. FML

#20513110
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23854) - you deserved it (3425)

On 02/19/2013 at 2:01am - animals - by xtammyle - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I met my new class. There are two Kevin Smiths. Neither will agree to a nickname, they have the same hair color, and their middle names both start with J. They have told me to call them Kevin 1 and Kevin 2. They both want to be Kevin 1. FML

#20512577
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30232) - you deserved it (1849)

On 02/18/2013 at 7:26pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, a guy wolf-whistled me as I walked to the shop wearing comfy joggers, no makeup and my hair scraped back. Feeling rather pleased about it, I told my best friend and my fiancé. Their unanimous conclusion: the guy must have been drunk or taking hallucinogenic drugs. FML

Today, I took an afternoon nap, and when I woke up, it was pitch black outside. Still groggy, I went downstairs, only to see my dad sporting a shocked expression and a suspiciously powder-white beard. He actually almost convinced me that I'd just woken up from a five year coma. FML

#20510255
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22659) - you deserved it (4253)

On 02/17/2013 at 12:56am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I moved in with my new dorm mate. I'm prone to very frequent panic attacks that can only be alleviated by cold air. My roommate is severely anemic, and has violent shivering fits when the temperature is below 80. No matter what, one of us is always shaking uncontrollably. FML

Today, working as a waitress, I was asked by a customer, yet again, how my baby was doing. I don't have a baby, but I do look very similar to my 25-year-old coworker, who's a new mom. People confuse us all the time. Unfortunately, my crush, who was standing nearby, doesn't know that. FML

#20504501
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23086) - you deserved it (1910)

On 02/13/2013 at 12:12am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had my girlfriend over for dinner with my family. My father had dressed up as a girl for a recent gig of his at a local pub. This got somehow brought up at the table. The rest of the dinner conversation consisted of him and my girlfriend discussing bras and lingerie. FML

#20503190
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21973) - you deserved it (1930)

On 02/12/2013 at 12:55am - love - by BadLuckCarson - United States (Iowa)

Today, my little sister chased me around the house with a mallet, giggling like a maniac. I ended up having to pin her to the ground, rip the mallet out of her hand and lock her in the bathroom. This isn't the first time. My mom still insists it's perfectly normal. FML

#20500833
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27814) - you deserved it (2207)

On 02/10/2013 at 11:17am - kids - by littlemiss - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I finally figured out why I've been getting diarrhea so often over the past six months. It only happens whenever I do something "sneaky". My body reacts strongly to how I stress over potentially getting caught. I'm a private investigator, and I apparently need a new career. FML

#20500655
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25704) - you deserved it (2804)

On 02/10/2013 at 5:41am - work - by screwed - United States

Today, my son threw the biggest fit in history about going to the dentist. He broke a whole stack of plates, overflowed the bathtub, let the dog loose, and kicked his father when he tried to calm him down. My son is 17. FML

#20495428
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24753) - you deserved it (27677)

On 02/06/2013 at 6:12am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, at a friendly get-together, my friend's husband had too much to drink and got into a fistfight with my husband. I'm seven-and-a-half months pregnant, and the friendly get-together was my baby shower. FML

#20493991
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24205) - you deserved it (2422)

On 02/05/2013 at 12:22am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had a half-hour conversation with my parents about going to college. I don't know what's worse, that they were trying to talk me out of it or that they're convinced that I'm going to get knocked up and drop out by the end of my freshman year. FML

#20492659
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21463) - you deserved it (2068)

On 02/04/2013 at 2:12am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I came home in a really good mood, and I greeted my husband with a grin and a "Hi, babe!" He just muttered, "Why can't you just DIE?" and continued playing his video game. FML

#20490556
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32099) - you deserved it (3717)

On 02/02/2013 at 5:34pm - love - by rani (woman) - Norway (Oslo)



Max Grünfeld's illustrated FML

Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Worst Sisters Ever
  • Growing up with a sister can be a good thing. If you're a guy, it can teach you about girls and how to interact with them so you won't grow up to be a sexist idiot who's afraid of women and who can only…

Monday 17 June 2013

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: