Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Linkerdoodles

Search for a member

Linkerdoodles

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3788
  • Number of comments : 120
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 6 posted

About Linkerdoodles : If you understand my profile picture, I love you and we can be best friends forever

Linkerdoodles's page activity

Visits<b>RhineBl</b> - the 05/21/2014 at 4:46am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 1:04am<b>uks</b> - the 03/19/2014 at 10:20am<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 5:53pm<b>connor98</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 6:29pm<b>sallee23444</b> - the 12/01/2013 at 11:30pm<b>Ian_from_0070</b> - the 10/16/2013 at 9:46pm<b>Holly1228</b> - the 10/03/2013 at 9:02am<b>Sacytrl</b> - the 08/20/2013 at 9:56am<b>hawright</b> - the 07/15/2013 at 11:30am<b>intheheart</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 10:42pm<b>ThatLooksSticky</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 8:56pm<b>sweet0cheeks</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 12:56pm<b>lymyabean</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 2:01am<b>toothpsate</b> - the 07/06/2013 at 7:15am<b>Dodopy</b> - the 07/05/2013 at 11:09pm<b>army_of_misfits</b> - the 07/05/2013 at 8:02pm<b>iitsAlexis</b> - the 07/05/2013 at 2:17pm

Linkerdoodles's FML badges

Follow up

You subsequently gave feedback by commenting on an FML that you’d submitted and was published.

One ring to rule them all

You submitted an FML that was successfully published on the website. This makes you an exceptional human being.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of Linkerdoodles's badges

Linkerdoodles's favorite FMLs

Today, I was babysitting for a new family. While the father was telling me about bed times and how to reach him, their dog started humping my leg. As I tried to discreetly push the dog away, his paw got caught in the pocket of my huge sweatpants, pulling them down. I was wearing a thong. FML

#771625
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62505) - you deserved it (10434)

On 04/02/2009 at 7:05pm - animals - by darlingditz (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went on a first date with a guy I don't know very well. He told me to dress in formal attire so I assumed he was taking me to a nice dinner. He took me to his brothers wedding, and introduced me as "the one" to his entire family. FML

#720830
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (95024) - you deserved it (5960)

On 03/31/2009 at 6:44am - love - by lizzardbreath (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to Walgreen's for a tub of Vaseline. The old guy at the counter looked at me, winked, and said, "Not having too much luck with the ladies, eh?" He was right. FML

#681464
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63995) - you deserved it (12093)

On 03/29/2009 at 3:08pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I saw a spider in my bathtub, so instead of killing it, i decided to bring my dog inside the bathroom to kill the spider for me. Turns out that the spider was a black widow, and my dog was bit. The dog killed the spider. The spider killed my dog. FML

#674037
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (77249) - you deserved it (160441)

On 03/29/2009 at 1:04am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I came out to my mom. I had an epic speech planned, and when I tried to tell her, it all fell apart and I started crying and just said, "I'm gay." After a few seconds silence, my mom sighs and says, "Duh." FML

#506180
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55999) - you deserved it (15534)

On 03/21/2009 at 5:13am - misc - by teriyaki124 - United States (California)

Today, I came out to my mom. I had an epic speech planned, and when I tried to tell her, it all fell apart and I started crying and just said, "I'm gay." After a few seconds silence, my mom sighs and says, "Duh." FML

#506180
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55999) - you deserved it (15534)

On 03/21/2009 at 5:13am - misc - by teriyaki124 - United States (California)

Today, I was watching this TV show where a man was describing how much he loved this woman, how he made every opportunity to see her, and how he loved her in a way nobody else could. I smiled, because that's exactly the way I feel about my crush. Then I realized the program was about stalkers. FML

#438513
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65160) - you deserved it (22925)

On 03/18/2009 at 12:42pm - misc - by bluten (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was sifting through my parents old home movies. I put in one and was horrified to see my parents having sex. I immediately ejected the tape and looked at the label. It said "Bermuda, 1989". They've told me I was conceived in Bermuda around that time. I've seen my own conception. FML

#391986
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (167813) - you deserved it (32289)

On 03/16/2009 at 7:08pm - intimacy - by ihatevideos (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was fooling around with my girlfriend for the first time. She put her hand on my penis over my jeans and said "Get hard for me." I was hard. FML

#364382
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (172695) - you deserved it (25925)

On 03/15/2009 at 11:20pm - intimacy - by illequipt - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was at a dance. I was griding with this guy when I felt something move in his pants. I stood up and stepped away. He replied with "Don't flatter yourself, it was my phone". FML

#254929
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17321) - you deserved it (42253)

On 03/09/2009 at 8:26pm - misc - by Joe (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was on my way home from a friends house. I called home ahead of time to let my parents know. My dad picked up and in a panting voice said, "Now isn't a good time, drive around the block for 15 minutes." FML

#194766
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (85628) - you deserved it (4602)

On 03/03/2009 at 11:20am - intimacy - by hlev24 (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, a customer opened with "you open bottles with them thangs?" I look around my desk for something he might confuse with an actual bottle opener. His girlfriend then informs me he is talking about my breasts. I work for a bank. FML

#176117
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41157) - you deserved it (3448)

On 03/01/2009 at 9:31pm - work - by bottlepoppin (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went to get a sports physical at a hospital. My nurse was morbidly obese and unattractive. She told me she would go through the tests listed on the sheet. She did everything, including feeling my genitalia. When it was done, I read over the sheet. Genitalia wasn't a test listed. FML

#162461
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (152339) - you deserved it (13396)

On 02/28/2009 at 4:58pm - health - by TahRah (man) - United States (Virginia)



FML's blog

  • Élodie's Illustrated FML
  • Aaaaah, the beach, the sunshine, cool water against our skin...  Nah, just kidding, I can't afford a trip to the beach. This blog is being written from a grotty apartment in the less salubrious parts of…

Friday 18 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: