Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Lilsbills

Offline (the 09/13/2014 at 3:42am) | Search for a member

Lilsbills

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 18 December 2000 (13 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2309
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Lilsbills : My name is Lily.

Lilsbills's page activity

Visits<b>starcaller17</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 5:56pm<b>nb1234</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 9:52pm<b>ZY1431</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 3:30pm<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 2:24pm<b>origamidragon</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 3:44am<b>Adam5858</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 9:01pm<b>wilburhp</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 8:12am<b>Godsofdracos</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 7:54am<b>AlliTheKat</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 5:20pm<b>ChloeLentin</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 8:49am<b>bernlee24</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 7:04pm<b>foxwasalamb</b> - the 06/07/2014 at 5:20am<b>boricualuv</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 11:17pm<b>worldclassrager</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 9:29am<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 12:40am<b>Prerogative</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 11:49pm<b>isabella1501</b> - the 05/21/2014 at 10:56pm<b>Budderchook</b> - the 05/21/2014 at 7:40am

Lilsbills's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of Lilsbills's badges

Lilsbills's favorite FMLs

Today, my sister brought a guy home while our parents were out. They had sex in her bedroom. I heard everything. The worst part wasn't her stupidly excessive moaning; it was that the moans sounded eerily similar to a cow mooing. FML

#20991588
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49748) - you deserved it (4561)

On 12/13/2013 at 7:34pm - intimacy - by puking now (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I got back the essay I wrote about how my country's education system is fucked. At one point, I made a spelling mistake. My teacher wrote a note about it, basically calling me illiterate and telling me to pay attention in school instead of whining about it. She misspelled "school". FML

#20990145
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41246) - you deserved it (3920)

On 12/12/2013 at 1:00pm - misc - by lrn2spel, teach (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, a rumor was spread around that I was dating somebody. I confronted the person who everyone thought I was dating, and asked him about it. He also thought we were dating. FML

#20989946
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47127) - you deserved it (5531)

On 12/12/2013 at 6:27am - love - by Rumors - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my boyfriend let me be the first one to read the novel he dropped out of college to write. Turns out it's titled "A Brief History of Ass" and is an incoherent ramble about every time we've had anal sex. FML

#20989324
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50512) - you deserved it (8009)

On 12/11/2013 at 7:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while on my way to work, an elderly woman complimented me on my breast cancer scarf. I explained that my grandmother made one for all her female grandchildren before passing away two years ago. The woman then went psycho and almost strangled me in an attempt to steal it. FML

Today, I learned that when your mom threatens to embarrass you by singing in public, the wrong response is, "Yeah? I dare you." FML

Today, I was babysitting my barely-pubescent cousins, and they started talking about giving blowjobs to their "boyfriends". When I got mad at them and told them they shouldn't be thinking of that stuff, they said I was just pissed 'cause I haven't gotten laid. FML

#20984257
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48384) - you deserved it (4530)

On 12/07/2013 at 8:07pm - misc - by bella - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend and I got into a huge argument while driving home from visiting family. We pulled into a gas station, and I went inside to grab a drink and cool down. When I came back out, both car and boyfriend were nowhere in sight. It was my car. FML

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when I got a sudden agonising cramp in my foot. I cried out in pain, but he didn't stop. If anything, my cries of pain seemed to spur him on. FML

#20981691
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44128) - you deserved it (7911)

On 12/05/2013 at 2:10pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Sunderland)

Today, I found out that if you accidentally step on your boss's dog's tail, yes, you can get fired. But not because you stepped on the dog's tail. You didn't say sorry. FML

#20979207
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26122) - you deserved it (37407)

On 12/03/2013 at 9:04am - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my bandmate and I decided to propose to our girlfriends, who are also in the band, at the same time in the middle of a concert. His girlfriend said yes. Mine ran off the stage crying. FML

#20978799
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49625) - you deserved it (5754)

On 12/02/2013 at 10:42pm - love - by rock'n roller (man) -

Today, my girlfriend wants to make a video of us having sex for us to watch later and figure out how to improve our skills in bed. The problem is her choice of cameraman: her uncle. FML

#20978171
204 comments

Today, I was proud when I started a confrontation with my best friend's brother because he is a sexist pig who treats women like crap. Six hours later my pride was gone: I made him an after-sex sandwich. FML

#20975509
100 comments

Today, I was visiting a family member at a women's prison. The staff wanted to search me, basically claiming that my breasts looked suspiciously disproportionate, implying I was smuggling something in. FML

#20972427
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40455) - you deserved it (3809)

On 11/27/2013 at 12:51pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was walking back home from a party, when I received an email from our neighborhood watch. It said to beware, because a "thug-like" stranger with a white shirt and brown hair had entered the neighborhood. My hair is indeed brown and I was wearing a white shirt. FML

#20972428
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39391) - you deserved it (3786)

On 11/27/2013 at 12:51pm - misc - by paranoid neighborhood - United States (Florida)



FML's blog

  • Gragrou's illustrated FML
  • One day, cats will rule the world, but not today, there's a bit of tin foil stuck under the couch. The Internet and cats is quite the love story, everybody knows that. A very serious study that was done…

Friday 26 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: