Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Lilsbills

Offline (19 hours ago) | Search for a member

Lilsbills

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 18 December 2000 (13 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2085
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Lilsbills : My name is Lily.

Lilsbills's page activity

Visits<b>nb1234</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 9:52pm<b>ZY1431</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 3:30pm<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 2:24pm<b>origamidragon</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 3:44am<b>Adam5858</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 9:01pm<b>wilburhp</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 8:12am<b>Godsofdracos</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 7:54am<b>AlliTheKat</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 5:20pm<b>ChloeLentin</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 8:49am<b>bernlee24</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 7:04pm<b>foxwasalamb</b> - the 06/07/2014 at 5:20am<b>boricualuv</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 11:17pm<b>worldclassrager</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 9:29am<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 12:40am<b>Prerogative</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 11:49pm<b>isabella1501</b> - the 05/21/2014 at 10:56pm<b>Budderchook</b> - the 05/21/2014 at 7:40am<b>mif</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 9:54pm

Lilsbills's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of Lilsbills's badges

Lilsbills's favorite FMLs

Today, my brother told my 3 year old son that cool kids call their parents by their real names. This wouldn't be half as bad if he hadn't also convinced my son that my real name was Satan. FML

#21247749
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27844) - you deserved it (2410)

On 08/29/2014 at 8:35am - kids - by Amithatevil - Japan (Kanagawa)

Today, I dreamed I was wrestling an alligator. I quickly woke up to my girlfriend yelling and me holding her in a headlock. FML

#21247589
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27677) - you deserved it (3631)

On 08/29/2014 at 12:16am - misc - by AgentOrion - United States (Alabama)

Today, I got my wisdom teeth removed. All I can remember is crying to my mom because I thought spoons were taking over the world. FML

Today, while my teacher was demonstrating how to use the ultrasound equipment, we all figured out that I'm pregnant. FML

#21245451
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45225) - you deserved it (8799)

On 08/25/2014 at 10:37pm - health - by whotouchedyou1 - United States (Texas)

Today, my sister felt guilty and told me about the changes she secretly made to my résumé months ago. She'd put "doing your mom" and "corporate espionage" as my hobbies, and "Justin Bieber's pussy waxer" as a previous job. No wonder I'm still unemployed. FML

#21244565
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37586) - you deserved it (7036)

On 08/24/2014 at 5:50pm - work - by fuck you, tasha (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, some random bloke introduced himself at a bar by asking to fuck me. I got tongue-tied trying to say both "fuck off" and "please go away". I ended up telling him to "Please fuck away." FML

#21242424
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36387) - you deserved it (6623)

On 08/21/2014 at 12:36pm - misc - by royallymessedup -

Today, a few minutes after giving birth to our fourth child, my wife pulled me close and whispered, "I love you, but if you ever put me through that again I'll rip your balls off." Everyone laughed. FML

#21239517
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41516) - you deserved it (13492)

On 08/17/2014 at 2:15am - kids - by you ripped them off ages ago (man) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, I was doing a design sketch for work. I snapped a pic and sent it to my boss. She replied, "Impressive. Nice sketch too." I was drawing at home, naked. My dick was in the picture. FML

Today, I came home early, only to hear a mad scramble in the living room. I found my now ex-girlfriend and best friend in there, sweaty and in their underwear. The idiot actually had the balls to claim he was teaching her how to do push-ups. FML

#21210956
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54695) - you deserved it (3842)

On 07/16/2014 at 4:09pm - love - by betrayed (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I sent my boyfriend a picture of my boobs. I quickly found out that I'd accidentally sent it to my sister instead. She sent me one back. FML

#21196202
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42822) - you deserved it (23903)

On 07/02/2014 at 1:01pm - intimacy - by boob sisters (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I overheard my mother talking to her friend, and using me as an example of how it's sometimes best to swallow. FML

#21196146
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45848) - you deserved it (4633)

On 07/02/2014 at 11:54am - intimacy - by unwanted daughter (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my coworker was telling me about his mom, when he asked about mine. I told him that I've never met my mom, because she died during my childbirth. It's a very painful subject for me, but all the same, my coworkers have decided they'll now only address me as "Tyrion". FML

#21178277
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43253) - you deserved it (4106)

On 06/17/2014 at 4:30pm - misc - by the lannisters send their retards - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I was walking in the street, and the next thing I know, I'm waking up in a hospital. According to witnesses, a guy came up and hit me over the head with a baseball bat. Apparently that's a thing that happens now. But it's okay, he had an excuse: he said he was drunk. FML

#21168803
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46920) - you deserved it (3465)

On 06/09/2014 at 9:56pm - health - by Harry (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, some pig slapped my ass as he passed me in the street, then looked back at me with a dirty grin. His grin turned to horror when he realized that I'm actually a guy, then to anger as he bitched me out for "tricking" him by "looking like a chick". FML

#21167190
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56330) - you deserved it (6795)

On 06/08/2014 at 2:32pm - misc - by 404: sense not found (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend sent me a text message confessing that she's been cheating on me. Apparently she regretted telling me the truth, because when I confronted her face-to-face, she claimed her roommate had sent it as a prank. She doesn't have a roommate. FML

#21167164
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46797) - you deserved it (3922)

On 06/08/2014 at 2:01pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)



FML's blog

  • Jim Trim's Illustrated FML
  • Action stations! I'm back from my holiday, I've got some sort of weirdly uneven tan and I already want to go back to the beach to bum about and finish off my colouring book. But I can't. I'm still…

Friday 29 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: