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Lillie_bird

Offline (the 09/05/2014 at 8:30am) | Search for a member

Lillie_bird

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 483
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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Lillie_bird's page activity

Visits<b>xDochx</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 1:52am<b>skychu</b> - the 04/08/2014 at 6:02pm<b>michaelaranda</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 2:06am<b>MissJennyale</b> - the 10/02/2013 at 9:28am<b>greg14</b> - the 09/04/2013 at 2:47pm<b>Denny1</b> - the 08/05/2013 at 9:39pm<b>UnluckyGenius</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 3:26am<b>1PersonIsMyWorld</b> - the 08/02/2013 at 1:58pm<b>ApexReaper</b> - the 05/12/2013 at 4:08am<b>BellaBelle</b> - the 05/09/2013 at 12:39pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/09/2013 at 11:40am<b>LukeE45</b> - the 05/06/2013 at 5:29pm<b>hotshot0185</b> - the 05/06/2013 at 8:52am<b>Covenant74</b> - the 04/16/2013 at 8:53pm<b>tacojauns</b> - the 04/15/2013 at 12:32am<b>djayy9011</b> - the 04/14/2013 at 7:41am

Lillie_bird's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of Lillie_bird's badges

Lillie_bird's favorite FMLs

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She just grabbed the ring and said in a raspy voice, "My precious..." FML

#21250558
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41651) - you deserved it (7858)

On 09/02/2014 at 2:58pm - love - by anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, a few minutes after giving birth to our fourth child, my wife pulled me close and whispered, "I love you, but if you ever put me through that again I'll rip your balls off." Everyone laughed. FML

#21239517
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42385) - you deserved it (13753)

On 08/17/2014 at 2:15am - kids - by you ripped them off ages ago (man) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, I dropped my kid into a crowded wishing fountain instead of a coin. FML

#21235686
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22070) - you deserved it (36149)

On 08/12/2014 at 6:21am - kids - by jake - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML

#21228111
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49122) - you deserved it (21239)

On 08/03/2014 at 1:16am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I was watching my 3 year old brother. He asked me to get him a cookie and I said, "What's the magic word?" He looked at me angrily and said "Bitch, please." FML

#21227114
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43308) - you deserved it (7025)

On 08/01/2014 at 9:57pm - kids - by WickedRene (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while working an early shift, I was dressing a wound on a gorgeous guy, when he laughed and pointed out some granny panties next to me on the floor. I guess I forgot to take yesterday's underwear out of my pants before putting them back on this morning. FML

#21223271
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33717) - you deserved it (8792)

On 07/28/2014 at 4:47pm - work - by dorrisdoes - New Zealand

Today, I woke up from a horrible nightmare. What was it about? Me accidentally scratching a non-stick pan with my utility knife. FML

Today, I had a rough day and was extremely tired. I took a nap on the couch, and woke up to a guy robbing my house. I pretended I was still sleeping, waiting a chance to grab him or run out safely. I ended up falling back asleep. FML

#21219246
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41559) - you deserved it (21389)

On 07/24/2014 at 11:59am - misc - by FML - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was browsing the People of Walmart site, chuckling at all the weirdos on there, when I came across a picture of my mom. FML

#21214404
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50421) - you deserved it (6784)

On 07/19/2014 at 6:38pm - misc - by Death By Parent (woman) - United States

Today, I found out that the loving nickname my Chinese mother has been calling me my entire life essentially translates to "little retard". FML

#21185495
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49299) - you deserved it (5489)

On 06/23/2014 at 3:52pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my friends thought it would be funny to slip a condom under my pillow at boot camp. The staff found out, I got bitched out for 30 minutes straight, and now I have to put a condom on the grip of any rifle I'm issued for a week. My new callsign is "Love Glove". FML

#21183341
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42537) - you deserved it (4399)

On 06/21/2014 at 5:42pm - misc - by LoveGlove (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I sent my girlfriend a request to confirm our relationship on Facebook. She accepted, then changed her screen name into "His Hand". FML

#21169063
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51260) - you deserved it (11163)

On 06/10/2014 at 12:02am - love - by MiserableMan (man) - Vietnam (Ho Chi Minh)

Today, my art teacher showed off a painting of his name he got in Japan. I can read Japanese, and it actually says "Old idiot". I really don't want to break it to him. FML

#21130223
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45200) - you deserved it (4736)

On 05/04/2014 at 2:12am - misc - by Sam (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, while I thought I'd never had an orgasm, my doctor informed me that I'm actually having orgasms almost every time I have sex. They just feel like utterly frustrating, slightly painful, unpleasurable and completely unsatisfying muscle contractions. FML

Today, my 3-year-old son discovered his testicles. When I asked him what they were, he replied, "They're my balls! They make my winkie happy!" Now he won't quit singing it. FML

#21084464
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37883) - you deserved it (5514)

On 03/11/2014 at 11:34pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)



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