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LilTiki559's favorite FMLs
by JustMarried / 05/07/2016 at 5:47pm / Ukraine / Intimacy
by myboyfriendisweird / 01/04/2015 at 9:50pm / United States (Arizona) / Love
by TimJack18 / 01/04/2015 at 6:14pm / United States (North Carolina) / Love
by woofwoof / 12/29/2014 at 11:17pm / Turkey (Izmir) / Animals
Today, I slept on the plane ride home and had a scary nightmare. I started screaming in my dream, so loud that it shocked the old lady sitting next to me into screaming as well. The whole plane began laughing as we were both screaming. FML
by danielzcwu / 12/29/2014 at 2:11pm / Taiwan (T'ai-pei) / Transportation
by Anonymous / 12/28/2014 at 9:49pm / United States (Delaware) / Intimacy
by koolkat9 / 12/22/2014 at 2:11pm / United States (Indiana) / Love
Today, while hanging out with this guy I'm interested in, we turned and made eye contact. We were face to face and I thought he was finally going to kiss me. He decided to lick my face from chin to forehead instead. FML
by qyx3lmnop24 / 12/20/2014 at 2:33am / United States (California) / Love
by jesspacheco27 / 12/15/2014 at 1:05pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by lonesome / 12/14/2014 at 10:22pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend of 2 years after eating in a 5-star restaurant. She said that she wasn't ready and that she would walk home by herself, which she did. A homeless gentleman walked up from behind me, patted me on the back and said, "Bitches man." I cried. FML
by Brasilian29 / 12/11/2014 at 7:01am / United States (California) / Love
by Anonymous / 12/07/2014 at 11:35pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, my girlfriend decided to treat me out to dinner and cake for my birthday. My mom felt left out and yelled at my girlfriend in an angry tirade. My girlfriend went home. I'm spending my birthday, alone in my room. FML
by Haitwun / 12/07/2014 at 9:18pm / United States (California) / Love
Today, my boyfriend made me a milkshake. It was pale yellow with some black spots. He told me it was banana and poppy seed. After drinking it, he told me they weren't poppy seeds. They were his pubes. FML
by pubemilkshake / 12/07/2014 at 9:12pm / United States (Utah) / Love
Today, I found out why my wife has been cold and distant lately. She went to a psycho fraudster - sorry, I mean "psychic medium" - who said I'm lusting after other women and am thinking about leaving her. She actually believed him. Now I'm considering leaving her for real. Well played, I guess. FML
by Anonymous / 12/06/2014 at 4:52pm / Belgium / Love
- 1Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had… 2Today, I've stopped smoking, lost 30 pounds, taken several painful tests, and checked my ovulation… 3Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went…
- Today, I met my recently divorced mother's new boyfriend. He is missing teeth and has long hair and… Today, I tried coming on to my fiancé. He just pushed me off and got out of bed, saying he wasn't… Today, I caught my dad spanking my mom with a spatula. The same spatula I use to cook my eggs every…