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LifelessStars

Offline (the 08/16/2014 at 12:55am) | Search for a member

LifelessStars

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2897
  • Number of comments : 73
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About LifelessStars : Just another teenage girl with no life

LifelessStars's page activity

Visits<b>Stryker_13</b> - 3 hours ago<b>deusetnatura</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 9:43pm<b>bugeja1na</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 11:08am<b>neeni88</b> - the 09/25/2013 at 12:45am<b>nissanleaf</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 8:02pm<b>mexeuphemism</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 4:47pm<b>Claytonioo</b> - the 07/19/2013 at 5:08am<b>tylerandrew</b> - the 07/17/2013 at 5:51pm<b>jonsmith01973</b> - the 07/07/2013 at 8:57pm<b>butthole321</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 12:34pm<b>semper_amo</b> - the 06/23/2013 at 1:20am<b>Danielle7994</b> - the 05/22/2013 at 2:57pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 04/15/2013 at 8:58pm<b>jr2222</b> - the 03/28/2013 at 3:40pm<b>BooBug8</b> - the 03/18/2013 at 4:03pm<b>Rob2kfore</b> - the 03/15/2013 at 2:27am<b>alanm707</b> - the 02/19/2013 at 3:01am<b>Disobey</b> - the 02/18/2013 at 7:51pm

Liked!<b>Stryker_13</b> - just now

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LifelessStars's favorite FMLs

Today, I'm left with two non-refundable tickets to Jamaica, because my now ex-boyfriend said his Quidditch tournament is more important than seeing my "fat ass in a bikini". FML

#20745099
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47957) - you deserved it (5970)

On 06/24/2013 at 7:24pm - love - by afraid of flying too - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my husband finally returned from his 18-month deployment. Sexually starved, we wasted no time getting busy. Later as we finally cooled off, I got a message from my Aunt. She was hiding in our closet the whole time to surprise us with cake for his safe return. FML

#20743795
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (78128) - you deserved it (7086)

On 06/24/2013 at 12:37am - intimacy - by jgtrflynn (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I witnessed an elderly lady getting mugged. I ran over to the guy mugging her and offered him the money in my wallet in return for him leaving her alone. The old lady snatched my money and ran away with the mugger. What the hell just happened? FML

#20733745
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52965) - you deserved it (8716)

On 06/18/2013 at 6:01pm - money - by No money, mo' problems - United States

Today, my grandma's new dildo arrived in the mail. We buried her yesterday. FML

#20731352
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68884) - you deserved it (3950)

On 06/17/2013 at 12:43pm - intimacy - by hinting (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, after discovering that our son is already sexually active, I asked my husband to have a talk with him. "Remember, son, it's all about the clit", wasn't what I had in mind. FML

#20713183
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60872) - you deserved it (13802)

On 06/08/2013 at 6:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. She pulled down my trousers, saw my Poke-ball boxers, and absolutely lost it. I had to lie next to her in bed for the next 10 minutes hearing her howl with laughter while crying "Dickachu, I choose you!" FML

#20711208
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55022) - you deserved it (64142)

On 06/07/2013 at 3:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, while sexting my girlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML

#20705129
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30768) - you deserved it (65517)

On 06/04/2013 at 8:15am - misc - by tinypenis - United States (New York)

Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy condoms. My card was declined, and I had to stand and watch in morbid fascination as the man behind me kindly paid for my purchase. His reason was "God forbid a maxed out Visa should get in the way of fucking." FML

#20698637
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65572) - you deserved it (18704)

On 06/01/2013 at 1:09am - intimacy - by Samprib (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, while feeding my neighbour's cats, I mistakenly switched up their foods. One has medicated food that causes drowsiness. The healthy cat got knocked out like a log. I panicked, laid him out by the bed, and spilled milk around his head to make it look "natural." I think I'm going to hell. FML

#20697165
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30385) - you deserved it (33349)

On 05/31/2013 at 10:59am - animals - by fuckshitcockwaffle (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I borrowed my boyfriend's laptop. Out of curiosity, I clicked through the bookmarks in his web browser. One of them took me to a site dedicated to sex stories featuring characters from My Little Pony. FML

#20687700
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42285) - you deserved it (16667)

On 05/26/2013 at 4:50pm - misc - by bestiality? do I look like a pig? (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, at the exact moment that I leaned over to show my dad a picture on my phone, my boyfriend texted me: "I'm no weather man, but you can expect a few inches tonight." FML

#20598564
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65697) - you deserved it (12624)

On 04/17/2013 at 1:39am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I finally invited my girlfriend over to meet my oddball parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "So, you're the silly girl who agreed to date my dickhead son." It went downhill from there. FML

#20586109
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44301) - you deserved it (6445)

On 04/12/2013 at 5:24am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, my mom broke the news that my dad secretly got married two months ago, to a woman he has been dating for 15 years, and that my parents have actually been divorced for 12 years. They just lied about it this whole time. FML

#20585943
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61842) - you deserved it (5420)

On 04/12/2013 at 1:11am - misc - by too young for this (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex; I know that some women are great multitaskers, but I'm guessing it was a bad sign when she started to go over the shopping list. FML

#20585940
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45584) - you deserved it (13379)

On 04/12/2013 at 1:05am - intimacy - by Fml (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, at work as a gynecologist, I called in my last patient of the day. As soon as I took a peek, I noticed that she had stuck googly-eyes above her vagina. She told me with a straight face not to be afraid, because "She doesn't bite." FML

#20582197
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47293) - you deserved it (4877)

On 04/09/2013 at 2:01pm - health - by Anonymous - United States



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  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

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