About LifelessStars : Hey its meeee!!! ^_^ on on here for mostly laughs. Usually on here on my phone but occasionally online soo yea and btw when I say guess what
you gotta guess
yes I'm that kind of person XD
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Who’s the fairest of them all?
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I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when he started shaking really hard. When I asked him what he was doing, he simply said "I want to be better than your vibrator!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (26059) - you deserved it (9538)
On 11/24/2010 at 12:55pm - intimacy - by Heyy - United States (Washington)
Today, I went shopping with my new "It's true, I'm a Ninja" shirt on. Suddenly an apple comes and hits me right in the eye. A little boy runs up to me, yells "You aren't a Ninja! A Ninja would have caught that!", and runs off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16495) - you deserved it (46689)
On 11/07/2010 at 8:13pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I had a job interview. When I got there, the lady interviewing me shook my hand and said, 'Hello, I'm gay.' I found this strange and I didn't know what to say, so I stated, 'Aw, it's OK, I support you.' She looked pretty offended, and I realized why when I found out that her name was Gaye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29188) - you deserved it (12835)
On 11/04/2010 at 5:18am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I asked my boyfriend in a sexy way "What should we do now, honey?" He answered, "Suck my dick?" I said "I was thinking of something more... romantic." He replied "Suck my dick in the moonlight?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (28959) - you deserved it (16286)
On 10/13/2010 at 9:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Spain (Asturias)
Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, my fingers got stuck between the wall and headboard. Screaming, he thought I was enjoying the sex and kept going even harder. I have 3 broken fingers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38139) - you deserved it (6155)
On 10/12/2010 at 8:57am - intimacy - by fungettingdressed - United States
Today, when I stopped at a light, I tossed a banana peel into a field along the side of the road. The man behind me got out of his car, picked up the banana peel and threw it back into my car at me. When I tried to tell him it was biodegradable, he told me to "stop making up words." FML
I agree, your life sucks (19037) - you deserved it (21722)
On 10/01/2010 at 9:47am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom
Today, I got grounded because I have a picture on facebook in which I'm touching the crotch of a cardboard cut-out of Obama. My parents insist the FBI will see that and I'll end up in jail. My parents are crazy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26279) - you deserved it (12900)
On 09/02/2010 at 1:54am - misc - by ItsObamasFault - United States
Today, I found out that whenever my best friend used to say she wanted to do my dad, she wasn't kidding. She accomplished her mission in my bed after school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45017) - you deserved it (3128)
On 09/01/2010 at 7:10am - intimacy - by fmlskank93 - Australia (Victoria)
Today, my boyfriend questioned why I always put my shirts in the dryer right before wearing them. I told him it was because the dryer causes my shirts to regain their form and tightness. His response: "You should throw your vagina in there along with them." FML
I agree, your life sucks (33896) - you deserved it (13448)
On 08/30/2010 at 1:51pm - intimacy - by FYouBoyfriend (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I heard my mother and father having sexual intercourse, and I found out that my mother moans the same way as my girlfriend. Guess who I now think about every time my girlfriend moans? FML
I agree, your life sucks (39272) - you deserved it (4379)
On 08/22/2010 at 8:14am - intimacy - by shawty - Australia (Queensland)
Today, my mom came into my bedroom and told me to listen to this voicemail. I listened to me and my girlfriend talking dirty followed by the bed springs bouncing for 3 minutes. I had my phone in the pocket while I was having sex with her and it left my mom a nice voicemail. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20199) - you deserved it (32722)
On 08/05/2010 at 7:24pm - intimacy - by JDLAX1924 - United States
Today, my room-mate came out of the bathroom, tossed a Playboy on the coffee table, threw away a used condom, dug his hand into my bag of Doritos, and washed his hands. In that order. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47734) - you deserved it (3111)
On 06/17/2010 at 4:06am - intimacy - by Doritos (man) - United States (Hawaii)
Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. While I was asleep, he drew a face on my stomach and when I woke up he was talking to it. He said it would be less weird if he was talking to my stomach with a face on it, representing the baby. According to him, our child is going to have a mustache. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14777) - you deserved it (18278)
On 06/14/2010 at 7:13pm - kids - by gibsonSG323 (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, my boyfriend wouldn't lick the whipped cream I had on my nipples because "That stuff is full of calories." FML
I agree, your life sucks (33304) - you deserved it (6693)
On 04/26/2010 at 5:58am - intimacy - by Rowden (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I just had a phone interview with a college. The lady asked me to spell out my password to a site so she can access my test scores. The password was "dick." FML
I agree, your life sucks (8705) - you deserved it (33892)
On 03/25/2010 at 7:07am - intimacy - by uhoh901 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Monday 17 June 2013
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