Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

LifelessStars

Offline (the 08/16/2014 at 12:55am) | Search for a member

LifelessStars

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2829
  • Number of comments : 73
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About LifelessStars : Just another teenage girl with no life

LifelessStars's page activity

Visits<b>deusetnatura</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 9:43pm<b>bugeja1na</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 11:08am<b>neeni88</b> - the 09/25/2013 at 12:45am<b>nissanleaf</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 8:02pm<b>mexeuphemism</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 4:47pm<b>Claytonioo</b> - the 07/19/2013 at 5:08am<b>tylerandrew</b> - the 07/17/2013 at 5:51pm<b>jonsmith01973</b> - the 07/07/2013 at 8:57pm<b>butthole321</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 12:34pm<b>semper_amo</b> - the 06/23/2013 at 1:20am<b>Danielle7994</b> - the 05/22/2013 at 2:57pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 04/15/2013 at 8:58pm<b>jr2222</b> - the 03/28/2013 at 3:40pm<b>BooBug8</b> - the 03/18/2013 at 4:03pm<b>Rob2kfore</b> - the 03/15/2013 at 2:27am<b>alanm707</b> - the 02/19/2013 at 3:01am<b>Disobey</b> - the 02/18/2013 at 7:51pm<b>joncole</b> - the 02/18/2013 at 6:00pm

LifelessStars's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of LifelessStars's badges

LifelessStars's favorite FMLs

Today, I was driving back home with my family. I had to sit quietly for half an hour, all while pretending I didn't notice my sister playing with herself under the coat on her lap. FML

#18891781
324 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41130) - you deserved it (3373)

On 01/23/2012 at 5:36pm - intimacy - by jjs51 (man) - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were hugging in the hall after school. This annoying kid I know walked by, and yelled, "Tiny penis!" at me. My girlfriend responded, "Yep." FML

#18872810
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36228) - you deserved it (4414)

On 01/21/2012 at 5:38pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I got really bored so I posted on Facebook "Someone should kidnap me for the day." My mom commented, "The only things willing to kidnap you are aliens, and that would be because they'd mistaken you for a cow." 16 people liked her comment. FML

#18860865
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35754) - you deserved it (10139)

On 01/20/2012 at 10:15am - misc - by LonerCow (woman) - United States

Today, my wife posted on Facebook, "FUCK THA POLICE!" She got 40 likes. I'm a police officer. FML

#18829619
302 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40183) - you deserved it (9626)

On 01/16/2012 at 10:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I came out to my father. He seemed to be totally okay with it, as long as I'm the "man" in my relationships. FML

#18825436
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27827) - you deserved it (8480)

On 01/16/2012 at 2:55pm - love - by anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I've had chairs thrown at me, kicks have hit me in the nuts and I've heard "I'm gonna fucking kill you, bitch" several times. I work at a kindergarten. And this is a good day compared to what I'm used to. FML

#18783134
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38138) - you deserved it (3343)

On 01/12/2012 at 6:54am - kids - by Anonymous - Sweden

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why having sex with him was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty Pringles can. FML

#18772275
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13532) - you deserved it (31977)

On 01/11/2012 at 12:42am - intimacy - by bunnyluver4545 - United States (Texas)

Today, while driving to my girlfriend's house, I passed up a stop sign without stopping. A car passing by honked. I honked back several times and flipped them the finger. Turns out it was my girlfriend's dad trying to say hi. FML

#18767011
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8424) - you deserved it (57320)

On 01/10/2012 at 3:50pm - misc - by Tom Ali - United States

Today, I was bored and started touching myself watching TV. My mother walked into my bedroom with a phone in her hand and yelled, "Stop jacking off and talk to your grandmother." FML

#18749585
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17210) - you deserved it (31299)

On 01/08/2012 at 7:43pm - intimacy - by caught - United States (Washington)

Today, despite being 21 years old and living in my own place, my mom still managed to walk in on me whacking off. FML

#18622040
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36679) - you deserved it (9337)

On 12/27/2011 at 2:11am - intimacy - by ikungfuyou (man) - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were at dinner with his parents when he discreetly slid his hand up my skirt and tickled me. This caused me to kick his dad's recently broken leg. FML

#18620963
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32113) - you deserved it (4313)

On 12/27/2011 at 12:26am - misc - by maddie - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, after explaining to my two year old that we were going bra shopping, he decided to announce to the entire bank that we were going to buy Mommy some boobies. FML

#18561778
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16958) - you deserved it (23052)

On 12/20/2011 at 1:59pm - kids - by imamomma - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting hot and heavy. She had her shirt off, and commented on the small size of her breasts. Trying to make her feel better, I said I dated smaller breasts. She replied by saying she'd dated bigger penises. FML

#18561391
291 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16453) - you deserved it (52542)

On 12/20/2011 at 12:57pm - intimacy - by Ryan - United States (Arizona)

Today, my brother and I proposed to our girlfriends at the same time. We had perfect synchronization after practicing for days. My brother's girlfriend said yes, mine said no. FML

#18552373
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49274) - you deserved it (4820)

On 12/19/2011 at 10:40am - love - by emmmbo - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend. I had been hiding the ring in the sock drawer. When I went to retrieve it, the ring was gone and in its place was a sticky note that said "NO." FML

#18508427
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51352) - you deserved it (3072)

On 12/14/2011 at 12:15am - love - by newlysingle (man) - United States



FML's blog

  • FML's Labor Day BBQ
  • The first Monday of September is a holiday in some countries, and is supposed to celebrate Labor Day. So, this means you do nothing to celebrate doing something. I'm confused.  For those of us who…

Monday 1 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: