Lianess

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Offline (the 07/23/2015 at 10:39pm)

Lianess

8Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 5 November 1998 (17 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 515
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Lianess : Welcome to my profile and stuff.. I don't really know what to write...

Lianess's page activity

Visits<b>ARetardedSeal</b> - 16 hours ago<b>robertd73</b> - the 11/05/2015 at 8:35am<b>idkwyatt</b> - the 10/17/2015 at 12:51am<b>haymac</b> - the 09/27/2015 at 4:50pm<b>xblaine</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 2:17am<b>dakotadavisbruh</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 5:03pm<b>demamcgirl16</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 7:58am<b>madnessking</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 10:47pm<b>Chrriis</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 9:43pm<b>Nate_moore19</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 11:39am<b>Sethan01</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 4:14pm<b>zschul1118</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 4:00pm<b>zBLAKEz</b> - the 03/12/2015 at 5:44pm<b>knightofdarkness</b> - the 03/12/2015 at 4:01am<b>Puffpie</b> - the 03/12/2015 at 3:59am<b>CODplayer4lyfe</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 6:20pm<b>jazzybrar</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 6:43pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 12:59pm

Fucked!<b>xblaine</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 8:17am<b>dakotadavisbruh</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 11:04pm<b>Sethan01</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 9:14pm<b>knightofdarkness</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 7:53am<b>DARKDAY07</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 5:57am<b>daneyboy</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 6:49am

Lianess's FML badges

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of Lianess's badges

Lianess's favorite FMLs

Today, my 3-year-old daughter came along, pointing a finger at me. I pretended to eat it by putting it in my mouth. She then said to me with disgust, "Why are you eating my booger?" Ah, that explains the saltiness… FML

by ManchotDesAndes / 02/26/2015 at 2:35am / Kids

Today, we got a new Roomba. I set it to clean and came back an hour later to find shit smears all over the floor. Apparently, one of my cats had done his business in the kitchen, and the Roomba had dragged it around the entire first floor of my house. FML

by Anonymous / 01/13/2015 at 8:50pm / United States (Delaware) / Animals

Today, I slept on the plane ride home and had a scary nightmare. I started screaming in my dream, so loud that it shocked the old lady sitting next to me into screaming as well. The whole plane began laughing as we were both screaming. FML

Today, I witnessed my very overweight cat trying to jump over my fence, only to shit himself half way up, and then land in it. FML

Today, my little brother learned about mortality when our dog died. Since then, he's gone a little nuts and keeps ranting that he sees no point as to why our other dog should live. He's 16. FML

by Anonymous / 11/26/2014 at 7:09am / South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal) / Animals

Today, as my kitten was sleeping on my lap, my boyfriend crept up on us and yelled, "BOO!" to make me jump. I wasn't scared, but the cat was. He tensed up and jumped to the floor. He also apparently had the runny shits, spraying me and the couch on his way down. FML

by nenette / 11/12/2014 at 5:50pm / France / Animals

Today, my mother locked me out of the house. Why? The dog and her needed some time to talk. FML

by Anonymous / 10/25/2014 at 8:51pm / United States (Indiana) / Animals

Today, I woke up to my daughter crying, and my son running through the living room completely naked with her bottle, laughing his head off. FML

by KayyElOh94 / 10/17/2014 at 6:30pm / United States / Kids

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

by Anonymous / 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I had to babysit two kids. It all went well until one of them duct taped a knife to a toy machine gun, lit the barbecue on fire, and ran around like a wild banshee screaming obscenities. The other one got scared and climbed onto the roof of the house. FML

by ellen77 / 09/13/2013 at 1:55am / United States (California) / Work

Today, I walked in on my fifteen-year-old son and his friends attempting to set up a rudimentary meth lab in his bedroom. I'm not sure whether to be angrier that they simply tried this, or that they thought burning up baking soda would somehow produce methamphetamine. FML

by JAdams / 08/12/2012 at 8:49pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Kids

Today, my brother got a pet ferret. He told me it had a flexible spine, so I bent it backwards. It farted, and clawed my face. FML

by ashleyrae / 06/29/2011 at 10:55am / United States (Mississippi) / Miscellaneous