About Liamj774 : If you're here, it's probably because I've made an idiotic comment, which is almost all of them. Anyway, if on the off chance you're here because of a witty or funny comment, which is unlikely, whale cum. Now that I have succeeded at chasing everyone off my profile, I'll say this. Life is like a box of chocolates. It doesn't last long for fat people.
Liamj774's FML badges
You sure know how to party?
You posted a comment on the 31st of December between 11pm and 1am. Happy New Year!
Between your Facebook account and your FML account, things are no longer complicated: their relationship is official. We like this.
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
Liamj774's favorite FMLs
by Random / 02/25/2016 at 5:09pm / United States (Alabama) / Love
Today, while at my job, a couple became angry with me because I charged them for an extra ranch they'd ordered, as I'm supposed to. When I explained how it says in the menu how any additional sauces are an extra charge, she said nastily, "That's okay, we'll just take it out of your tip". FML
by hexphoenix / 04/06/2015 at 8:58pm / United States (California) / Work
Today, I jokingly sent my girlfriend a link to an article about giving better head. She didn't think it was funny, and has since sent me numerous articles about the female orgasm, and I just got a link to the Wikipedia article about the clitoris. FML
by Anonymous / 03/10/2015 at 7:15pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 02/19/2015 at 8:34am / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/13/2014 at 2:56am / Canada (Alberta) / Animals
by Anonymous / 07/22/2014 at 1:39pm / United States (California) / Kids
Today, I was glued to the toilet all day, gushing fountains of crap, due to my own bad cooking. It got so bad that I ran out of toilet paper and had to desperately jump in the shower and stay there for nearly two hours. I can't even feel my own asshole any more. FML
by Numbass123 / 05/04/2014 at 1:17pm / United States (Nevada) / Health
by rapunzel3416 / 08/30/2013 at 5:23am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, it's been weeks since some asshat started placing gnomes in my front and back yards. I resorted to setting up cameras, which I thought had deterred the idiot, until I walked into my kitchen this morning and found two gnomes on the counter. Nothing on the tapes. I'm freaking out here. FML
by ilivealoneandwhatthefuck / 06/23/2013 at 1:02pm / Guam / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 06/08/2013 at 6:34am / United States (Alabama) / Intimacy
by ironies a b*tch / 04/13/2013 at 1:04am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation
Today, at work as a gynecologist, I called in my last patient of the day. As soon as I took a peek, I noticed that she had stuck googly-eyes above her vagina. She told me with a straight face not to be afraid, because "She doesn't bite." FML
by Anonymous / 04/09/2013 at 2:01pm / United States / Health
by Amanda / 03/10/2013 at 12:08pm / Canada / Kids
by almostkilledmyself / 12/29/2012 at 2:30am / Canada (Manitoba) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house when I got a call from my parents. They told me to come home immediately. Panicking, I rushed home. My dad pulled out a clear tube filled with dried leaves. They accused me of having marijuana. It was catnip for my kitten. FML
by potheadloljk / 12/01/2012 at 9:01pm / United States (Maine) / Miscellaneous