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Leebra's favorite FMLs
Today, 50,000 copies of the new edition of the town's phone book came out. I manage a pizza place and bought a full menu ad. Apparently the ad designer got confused, as they placed my cell phone number in huge bold letters at the bottom of the ad instead of the store's phone number. FML
by Anonymous / 09/07/2010 at 3:16pm / United States (Iowa) / Work
by speedstick / 09/07/2010 at 11:36am / United States / Health
by Oops / 08/27/2010 at 12:06am / United States (Colorado) / Love
by keisha89 / 06/21/2010 at 8:27pm / United States / Love
by Anonymous / 05/20/2010 at 7:04am / Canada (Ontario) / Love
Today, I was going over some paperwork with my back to my office door. As I turn around, my boss enters and says my name loudly. I was startled so bad that I jumped, yelped, and a high-pitched fart snuck out. Everyone in the office now gives prior notice before dropping by the "fart guy's" office. FML
by Mic / 01/07/2010 at 12:44pm / United States (North Carolina) / Work
Today, I came home to find my room completely torn apart. My mom and dad start yelling at me asking me why I am doing drugs because she found a tiny baggie on the floor. It was the little bag that spare buttons come in when you buy a dress shirt. FML
by Theo / 12/18/2009 at 1:52am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 12/16/2009 at 8:57pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids
Today, a mother and son were in my office. The kid wasn't feeling well and threw up. Mom covered his mouth with her hand, creating a vomit nozzle and covering me in puke. She yelled that I deserved to be sprayed on because I was not quick enough in getting a bucket for her son. FML
by Andy / 12/16/2009 at 3:43pm / United States (Florida) / Work
by 205 / 11/13/2009 at 4:23pm / United States / Transportation
by laurwitharawr / 10/06/2009 at 8:08am / United States (New York) / Kids
Today, the subway was extremely crowded and I ended up with my butt in a man's crotch. I kept trying to inch away or turn a different way, but there was no room. He could have turned to face the doors, but didn't. He got an erection. I was on there with him for 20 minutes. FML
by grossgross / 09/26/2009 at 2:21pm / United States (New York) / Transportation
by Ballshurt / 09/07/2009 at 12:57am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was having sex with a girl. She was really into it and not holding back on the noise...That is, until I received a text message from my little sister next door reading "If she is making that much noise, she is probably faking it...Trust me, I know." FML
by OhFseriously123 / 08/06/2009 at 6:05am / Italy (Lombardia) / Intimacy
Today, I rushed to the post office to mail an important document for the study abroad program that I'd applied for, which was due in a few days. Just as the envelope slipped out of my hand and into the mail box, I caught a glimpse of the upper right corner where there was supposed to be a stamp. FML
by nostamp / 07/10/2009 at 2:20am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous