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Leebra's favorite FMLs
by wtf / 06/09/2011 at 11:04am / United Kingdom (Edinburgh) / Health
by Maddie110110 / 06/07/2011 at 12:43am / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, I was so sick that I was puking and had the runs. While on the toilet, I yelled for my boyfriend to get me a bowl to puke in. As I did so, I saw that a ton of it was forming on the floor in dots. My boyfriend had given me a spaghetti strainer. FML
by megomania / 05/02/2011 at 9:51am / United States (North Carolina) / Health
by Burnt / 05/02/2011 at 5:33am / United States (Texas) / Health
by bobo / 04/23/2011 at 9:02pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals
by Damian / 04/22/2011 at 7:11am / Intimacy
by Username / 04/21/2011 at 2:30pm / United States / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 04/19/2011 at 10:21pm / United States / Animals
Today, I got a call from a girl I was seeing. She said that she was falling for someone else, but she still liked me and couldn't decide what to do. Being the romantic (idiot) I am, I told her that she should do what would make her happiest, thinking that she would pick me. She didn't. FML
by HFCS / 04/18/2011 at 12:53am / Canada (British Columbia) / Love
Today, I was cutting a little boy's hair at the hairdressers where I work. While cutting his bangs, I noticed his forehead was surprisingly warm. When I asked him if he felt OK, he threw up all over my gown. I think he had some broccoli today. FML
by stickyhair / 04/18/2011 at 12:46am / United States / Kids
by Xanadu / 04/16/2011 at 3:04am / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy
by Username / 04/16/2011 at 1:14am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Tjop / 04/15/2011 at 7:50am / South Africa (Western Cape) / Love
Today, I saw a spider crawling across a poster in my bedroom, so I smacked the spot below it to scare the spider into climbing back up the wall. Instead, because the poster wasn't completely flat to the wall, I catapulted the spider straight into my face. FML
by spiderwoman / 04/15/2011 at 7:47am / United Kingdom (East Sussex) / Animals
Today, I used my hair straightener to attempt to straighten my eyelashes and burned my eyelid. I don't know what's sadder, that fact I thought it would be fun, or that I was stupid enough to think I wouldn't hurt myself. FML
by sadcase / 04/12/2011 at 10:01am / Australia / Health
- Today, I woke up to a nude picture of my girlfriend. Once I looked at it my morning wood went away.… Today, I had hooked up with this girl and had finally lulled her asleep. I didn't want to stay so I… Today, my boyfriend and I were making out when he sweetly whispered in my ear "it's not gonna suck…