LMxDelta38

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Offline (the 06/12/2015 at 12:03pm)

LMxDelta38

2Fucked!

LMxDelta38LMxDelta38
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 13 February 1991 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6124
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About LMxDelta38 : Hey Im Matt! I love meeting new people, so if you want to chat shoot me a message!

LMxDelta38's page activity

Visits<b>bombielol</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 4:47am<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 1:55pm<b>kaailin</b> - the 02/21/2015 at 7:21am<b>Mons</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 2:47am<b>Shamandalie89</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 12:56am<b>JuliaaNoelle</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 10:59am<b>ktpnothappening</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 10:16pm<b>Kitty_Kat44</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 2:32pm<b>RipeFlame</b> - the 12/24/2014 at 12:53pm<b>colton_colton</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 2:26am<b>herecomestheboom</b> - the 11/16/2014 at 9:12pm<b>smithv171</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 11:11pm<b>ThepurpleCow</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 2:00pm<b>FMLL2016</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 4:38pm<b>AHzulu</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 9:00pm<b>sorryheadphones</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 9:22pm<b>LAUREN_1053</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 5:11pm<b>lex1459</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 3:32pm

Fucked!<b>44LynnLynn</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 11:10pm<b>jeriaslovesyou</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 8:38pm

LMxDelta38's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

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LMxDelta38's favorite FMLs

Today, I caught my teenage daughter doing her laundry for the first time ever. She had piles of black and white, but then she threw them together in the washing machine. I told her blacks and whites were supposed to be separate, but she just said, "End the segregation, mom." FML

by Anonymous / 04/12/2015 at 4:57pm / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, I found out that turkeys can fly. I also found out how much a new windshield costs. FML

by Anonymous / 04/12/2015 at 2:29pm / United States (Vermont) / Money

Today, I bought a garden gnome to spice up my lawn. Tonight, someone threw it right through my living room window. Not only will the repairs cost a ton, my neighbor keeps saying stupid shit to me, like "You must be shattered" and "Looks like you ain't got a window gnome... more." FML

by dickhead / 04/10/2015 at 6:17pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, a guy tried to carjack me. Good news: I drive a stick shift, and the idiot apparently couldn't, so I still have my car. Bad news: he was so angry, he beat the shit out of me. I had to get stitches, and now I look like I went on a date with Chris Brown. FML

by Anonymous / 04/10/2015 at 2:04pm / United States (Florida) / Health

Today, my roommate's noisiest cat passed away. My previously-silent cat has decided that someone has to fill the void, and has been running around the apartment howling ever since. FML

by Crazy cat lady / 04/10/2015 at 11:20am / Canada (Manitoba) / Animals

Today, a parent of one of the students I teach called me to complain that I was teaching her child "lies" and "fairytales". I was teaching them about the Holocaust. FML

by PrettySureItsReal / 04/09/2015 at 3:38pm / United States (Missouri) / Work

Today, I went driving for the first time with my mom. When she wasn't screaming, she gave great advice like, "Stop at the red light" and "Don't crash into cars". I need to drive 50 hours with her. FML

by fedupson / 04/09/2015 at 10:03am / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, I went to the gun range for a birthday and got shot in the foot by my mom. FML

by Notre_Dame_714 / 04/08/2015 at 5:17pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, at a mind-numbingly boring support session, everyone was talking about their hardships. One guy was talking about losing his leg in a car accident. I was half-asleep and asked without thinking, "Did you ever find it?" I almost shat my pants at the roomful of death glares that followed. FML

by S to the HIT / 04/08/2015 at 12:08pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, I had to get stitches in my vagina due to an unfortunate mishap while climbing a fence. FML

by burnswhenipee / 04/07/2015 at 8:47pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, I went to buy some makeup. As I was checking out, the cashier said, "You're going to need more than that to cover up that face." FML

by f my lifw / 04/07/2015 at 11:43am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to bail my drunk dad out of jail after he beat the shit out of a mime artist. All he had to say on the matter was "Fucking bastard was playing mind games." and that he'd beat him up again if he could. FML

by ~__~ / 03/20/2015 at 5:23pm / Miscellaneous

Today, my drunken mom began to frantically scream "YEAH" "WOO HOO" and "ALRIGHT" at some kindergarteners that were singing Amazing Grace in honor of a restaurant owner who had recently died. FML

by RadioactiveKush / 03/01/2015 at 2:07am / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, some popped-collar wearing shitbird tried to pick me up with the line, "You look like Marilyn Monroe's corpse! Wanna fuck?" FML

by Anonymous / 02/20/2015 at 4:26pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my drinking problem became apparent when my daughter asked for a glass of juice, and I instinctively poured a large glass of scotch instead. FML

by Anonymous / 02/16/2015 at 8:04pm / United States (California) / Kids