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LMxDelta38

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LMxDelta38

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LMxDelta38LMxDelta38
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 13 February 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1709
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About LMxDelta38 : Hey Im Matt! I love meeting new people, so if you want to chat shoot me a message!

LMxDelta38's page activity

Visits<b>lex1459</b> - 13 hours ago<b>will1896</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 8:07pm<b>firefighterwife</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 2:46pm<b>Emmiii</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 6:36pm<b>catherine012</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 5:16pm<b>cohnsonj</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 3:27am<b>CarlyMarDry</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 11:32pm<b>TerraShadow</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 6:56am<b>JessBassett</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 10:39pm<b>Khaleesi_26</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 3:51pm<b>brokenjawskhan</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 3:05am<b>Alexis2742</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 3:21pm<b>jeriaslovesyou</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 6:28am<b>44LynnLynn</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 5:10pm<b>thatsawkward7</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 1:47pm<b>pptm</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 12:39pm<b>Fillie</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 11:31am<b>ashleylove0525</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 10:01pm

Liked!<b>44LynnLynn</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 11:10pm<b>jeriaslovesyou</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 8:38pm

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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LMxDelta38's favorite FMLs

Today, I learned that if you give a squirrel a cookie, he'll climb up your pants in search of more cookies. FML

Today, my sister told me about her upcoming trip to Mexico. I asked her how she was going to do anything without knowing any Spanish. She told me she's "just going to read their lips". FML

#21272968
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30247) - you deserved it (2225)

On 10/07/2014 at 6:15pm - misc - by epic174 - United States

Today, I found a decomposing hamster deep in my closet. My daughter had hidden "Peach" after accidentally killing it and said it had ran away a month ago. And I'd believed her. FML

#21271391
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34046) - you deserved it (4030)

On 10/05/2014 at 5:34pm - kids - by SmellyCloset (man) - United States (California)

Today, my husband and I broke the news that I'm pregnant. Our 8-year-old son's reactions so far have been crying inconsolably, trying to punch me in the stomach, and swearing that he won't let me give him a brother or sister. FML

#21259449
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36242) - you deserved it (4236)

On 09/16/2014 at 1:44pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, I went deep-sea fishing with my friends. I told them my new phone case is waterproof, and I showed them by pouring a bit of water on it. My friend decided to throw it in the water for a better example. The case didn't float. FML

#21258099
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41097) - you deserved it (6404)

On 09/14/2014 at 2:47pm - misc - by HiImAlfredo (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I got high for the first time. Apparently I called my vet and told him my goldfish was barking. I found out when he called me back later to make sure we were both okay. FML

#21258033
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31594) - you deserved it (18181)

On 09/14/2014 at 12:38pm - animals - by Anonymous - Ghana (Greater Accra)

Today, I took my daughter out driving to practice for her road test. I told her to make a left into a parking lot. She missed the 30 foot wide entrance, but not the two foot wide tree. FML

#21255774
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36220) - you deserved it (3474)

On 09/10/2014 at 4:15pm - misc - by Crash (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I woke up to find a huge zit directly between my two eyebrows. My friends have started calling me "The North Star." FML

#21253662
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34865) - you deserved it (3231)

On 09/07/2014 at 11:55am - health - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I learned that while other people drunk call their exes, I drunk adopt cats. Seven cats, to be exact. FML

#21248352
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40835) - you deserved it (9481)

On 08/30/2014 at 7:56am - animals - by cat lady (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, after ignoring my concerns and declaring that "safety equipment's for pussies", my husband went rock climbing for the first time. He only sprained his ankle, but is acting like it's broken. He's now playing video games in bed and pissing in a bucket because walking is "too painful". FML

#21234823
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39433) - you deserved it (4026)

On 08/11/2014 at 12:27pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, as I wandered through the streets of an unfamiliar city, I spotted a cop and darted across the street to ask for assistance. He kindly gave me directions as he wrote me out a citation for jaywalking. FML

#21230350
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36498) - you deserved it (8840)

On 08/05/2014 at 7:46pm - misc - by spekledworf (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I asked my mom why nobody likes me. She reeled off about a dozen reasons. FML

#21223790
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37231) - you deserved it (8704)

On 07/29/2014 at 2:15pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, a customer threatened to smash my face in because I wouldn't give him a veteran's discount on a donut. He looked like he'd eaten his way out of fat camp, and it seemed the only action he'd seen was fighting his way into a lard factory. Still, he swung fast, and I now have a black eye. FML

#21219507
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39173) - you deserved it (16271)

On 07/24/2014 at 5:23pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was scrubbing the bloody aftermath of a successful mouse trap off of my stove with an old toothbrush. After a few good scrubs, out of habit I put the toothbrush in my mouth while I turned on the water. FML



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