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KyuuketsukiApple

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KyuuketsukiApple
  • Town/Country : England, UK
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 17 December 1994 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 2154
  • Number of comments : 54
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About KyuuketsukiApple : I'm not a grammar (or spelling or punctuation) nazi, but if you butcher the English language, I will point and laugh. It's nothing personal.

In case you were wondering, kyuuketsuki is Japanese meaning vampire.

KyuuketsukiApple's last visitors

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KyuuketsukiApple's FML badges

Facebook

Between your Facebook account and your FML account, things are no longer complicated: their relationship is official. We like this.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

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KyuuketsukiApple's favorite FMLs

Today, I was diagnosed with a clogged milk gland. I am not, nor have ever been, pregnant and therefore have also never breastfed. This condition is caused by my boyfriend's over-active urge to suck on my nipples. I'm in horrible pain, and he won't stop laughing. FML

#18698902
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27725) - you deserved it (4465)

On 01/03/2012 at 6:07pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I went jogging with my girlfriend. I'm pretty sure my moobs bounced more than her breasts. FML

#18697207
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14427) - you deserved it (25465)

On 01/03/2012 at 2:36pm - misc - by max (man) - United States (California)

Today, I ignored my phone, as my mother has dementia and calls me 15 or so times a day, thinking each time is the first. I braved horrendous rain and gale-force winds to go to work. Turns out it was work calling to tell me not to bother coming in. FML

Today, my girlfriend hated the idea of sex so much she was willing to give me money for a stripper. FML

#18693659
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30146) - you deserved it (4874)

On 01/03/2012 at 2:17am - intimacy - by Cpt Colin (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my daughter brought her new boyfriend over for dinner. I realize now why she said we would get along great: we graduated high school together. FML

#18689614
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41341) - you deserved it (2995)

On 01/02/2012 at 8:10pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my friend set me up with a cute guy who is very germaphobic. So, I spent 4 hours cleaning my apartment. 2 minutes into the date, I sneezed. He politely told me he wasn't feeling well and left. FML

#18669836
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24627) - you deserved it (2857)

On 01/01/2012 at 12:41am - love - by upsetandannoyed - United States (New York)

Today, while shopping at Wal-Mart, a guy grabbed my butt. When I turned around to slap him, he shook his head, said "Nice ass but such an ugly face", then walked away. I've never been told I'm ugly before. FML

#18667019
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27309) - you deserved it (6920)

On 12/31/2011 at 7:51pm - misc - by thathurt (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I got circumcised by my girlfriend's braces. FML

#18661455
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50162) - you deserved it (10127)

On 12/31/2011 at 4:21am - intimacy - by nickthetank (man) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I found out that the neighbor I'd given a bottle of wine to for Christmas is a recovering alcoholic. FML

#18660229
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24120) - you deserved it (6011)

On 12/31/2011 at 1:48am - misc - by thechimpchapter - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, while having sex, I told my boyfriend that I love him. I could feel him go soft inside me. FML

#18657042
318 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41587) - you deserved it (8919)

On 12/30/2011 at 8:36pm - intimacy - by KrissyBearr - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time to meet my family. The night consisted of my sisters hiding in a tent and chasing us around in it, my parents singing songs from 'The Lion King' opera-style and throwing cheese at him. Pretty sure he's freaked out. FML

#18650275
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23952) - you deserved it (3545)

On 12/30/2011 at 1:35am - love - by wellthatsawkward (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, I was taking people's orders at the drive-thru. I was confused as to why people were screaming their orders at me, until one of my managers handed me a paper that he'd found taped to the menu, saying "speak loudly speaker isn't working properly." Punkd. FML

#18649632
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21259) - you deserved it (2646)

On 12/30/2011 at 12:38am - work - by Ashton Sprunger - United States

Today, I found out my girlfriend starts fights with me over text because apparently, when I'm arguing with someone, I stop speaking in "annoying shorthand" and am grammatically correct. FML

#18645768
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8058) - you deserved it (31053)

On 12/29/2011 at 5:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, a friend told me over MSN that her father had died. Trying to express some solidarity, I went to send her a tearful smiley. I accidentally sent her the dancing pig animation instead. FML

#18644636
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16022) - you deserved it (24755) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/29/2011 at 2:32pm - misc - by Kevin - France

Today, I texted my boyfriend on the way to the hospital to tell him I needed stitches, after my brother's dog bit me on the breast. His response? "Pics or it didn't happen." FML

#18643236
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26672) - you deserved it (4835)

On 12/29/2011 at 10:48am - health - by OH COME ON (woman) - United States (New York)



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