About KyuuketsukiApple : I'm not a grammar (or spelling or punctuation) nazi, but if you butcher the English language, I will point and laugh. It's nothing personal.
Hopefully I'll be a medical student in the near future, aspiring towards trauma or psych! :)
In case you were wondering, kyuuketsuki is Japanese meaning vampire.
~ I'm on the iPhone app mostly (lurking), but feel free to message anyway. I'll probably reply by the weekend...
Judgmental
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, after a twelve week dry spell followed by an eight week one, I decided to take a bit more initiative at seducing my girlfriend. Not only was she "not in the mood" again, but she offered me Trident Layers gum instead. She apparently thought that it was a fair trade. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18071) - you deserved it (3353)
On 02/04/2012 at 10:46pm - intimacy - by dasnich (man) - United States (Arkansas)
Today, I had to explain to my 18-year-old daughter why she can't pull a duck face pose for her driver's license. She still doesn't believe me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23632) - you deserved it (3342)
On 02/03/2012 at 2:58am - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Surrey)
Today, I was using a restroom when I heard someone sneeze. I said, "Bless you." It happened again about three times, so I repeated myself each time. I then noticed it was an automatic air freshener. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11662) - you deserved it (14918)
On 02/03/2012 at 12:25am - misc - by coleslaw (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I reached a new low in my relationship: my boyfriend got so drunk I had to help him take a piss. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18952) - you deserved it (4869)
On 02/02/2012 at 8:02pm - love - by lillymean (woman) - United Kingdom (Southampton)
Today, a stranger told me how proud he was that my boyfriend and I were so open with our sexuality. For the past three years, most strangers have thought we are a pair of gay men. I am a woman. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24766) - you deserved it (5283)
On 02/02/2012 at 1:29pm - love - by Mrs. Man (woman) - United States (Iowa)
Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. It was going well until she started talking dirty, saying stuff like, "You like my tushy, baby?" "I want to fellate you so bad," and "You'll need some ice after this one." My boner practically retracted into my body. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23518) - you deserved it (3636)
On 01/30/2012 at 7:25pm - intimacy - by ugh (man) - United States
Today, I was standing in the bathroom and farted. It felt like someone stabbed me in the butt. I jumped out of shock, and my head slammed into the mirror. My glasses fell onto the floor and broke. I now need new glasses, a new mirror, and an ice pack for my head. All because I farted. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16074) - you deserved it (7260)
On 01/29/2012 at 8:27pm - health - by Rachal - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I found out that Google+ has been automatically uploading my cell phone pictures as I take them. My friends have now seen pictures of me, my penis, and other things too horrifying to talk about. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11904) - you deserved it (30198)
On 01/29/2012 at 7:26pm - misc - by brannie - United States
Today, I woke up and decided that I no longer give a fuck what I look like. Today is also the day a very attractive exchange student joined my private band lessons. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14980) - you deserved it (8018)
On 01/29/2012 at 2:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)
Today, my girlfriend started a month-long period of not talking to me. One of her male friends, who is a self-styled astrologist, told her there are "bad omens" in our relationship for the coming weeks. I don't know if I should dump her for being gullible or just plain stupid. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18913) - you deserved it (2348)
On 01/29/2012 at 2:10pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (New York)
Today, it's my girlfriend's birthday. I presented her with an oil painting of her that I'd been working on for over a month, and she started to cry. I thought it was because she liked it, until she asked if she really looks that ugly and disproportionate in real life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20143) - you deserved it (2428)
On 01/29/2012 at 2:09pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend gave me twelve roses and told me that he would love me until the last one dies. Remembering the Facebook like, I began looking for the fake one but couldn't find it. When I pointed out that all twelve were real and would die within days, he responded, "Exactly." FML
I agree, your life sucks (27530) - you deserved it (2157)
On 01/28/2012 at 7:10pm - love - by Shelly P. (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, my boyfriend told me he loves me. Instead of saying it back, I had a panic attack. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15328) - you deserved it (11877)
On 01/25/2012 at 7:33am - love - by Paicked (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I was talking dirty with someone on the phone, when at one point I said, "Oh yeah, you like that?" She responded, "I can't actually feel anything you know, we're just on the phone." FML
I agree, your life sucks (8425) - you deserved it (21064)
On 01/25/2012 at 12:00am - intimacy - by talkingtoaretard (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was accepted into a police academy. I called my girlfriend of 2 years, who was supportive through the process. She promptly broke up with me, stating, "You'll be really busy in the academy, and I can't marry a police officer. Its a dangerous job." And then called me selfish for "doing this to us." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26789) - you deserved it (2201)
On 01/23/2012 at 4:56am - work - by FuturePolice (man) - United States (California)
Friday 24 May 2013
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