Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Kimba_Sprite

Search for a member

Kimba_Sprite

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 26 December 1990 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2973
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Kimba_Sprite's page activity

Visits<b>senbonzakuraa</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 6:00am<b>Oihana</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 3:58pm<b>Ayoomoofie</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 10:54am<b>DLS930</b> - the 08/17/2013 at 3:59pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:04pm<b>jayde_dox</b> - the 12/31/2009 at 2:00am<b>muffy_da_bear</b> - the 09/22/2009 at 12:34pm<b>allmidnighteyes</b> - the 09/22/2009 at 9:38am<b>Daaniellee1234</b> - the 09/14/2009 at 10:39pm<b>Starchild21</b> - the 09/13/2009 at 8:52pm<b>JustSoLost</b> - the 09/13/2009 at 4:29am<b>ViCT0RiA</b> - the 09/11/2009 at 5:30pm<b>redbluegreen</b> - the 09/11/2009 at 3:38pm<b>cheesefest</b> - the 09/06/2009 at 2:52am<b>Impact009</b> - the 08/23/2009 at 3:24am<b>kewlfox</b> - the 05/26/2009 at 5:59pm<b>killface</b> - the 05/26/2009 at 12:54pm<b>Bob77</b> - the 05/26/2009 at 10:59am

Kimba_Sprite's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Kimba_Sprite's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend was reading me a love poem he wrote for me. It was beautiful, and going really well until he read the last line, which had a girl's name in it. It wasn't my name. My boyfriend said "shit, wrong girl", and dug through his bag for a different poem. FML

#4277493
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57972) - you deserved it (4169)

On 08/04/2009 at 7:27am - love - by jemma (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend was reading me a love poem he wrote for me. It was beautiful, and going really well until he read the last line, which had a girl's name in it. It wasn't my name. My boyfriend said "shit, wrong girl", and dug through his bag for a different poem. FML

#4277493
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57972) - you deserved it (4169)

On 08/04/2009 at 7:27am - love - by jemma (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I finally decided to tell my mother, a former Miss North Carolina winner, that I was several weeks pregnant. She immediately burst into tears and hugged me. She kept saying, "Thank god, thank god." At first I was relieved. Then she said, "I thought you were just getting fat." FML

#4244213
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46513) - you deserved it (4232)

On 08/03/2009 at 12:11am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my friends had ditched me for a party I hadn't been invited to so I was sitting home alone. The only other thing in my house was the mosquito I nicknamed Fred. I liked to watch Fred fly around and try to suck my blood. 20 minutes later, I found Fred's dead body. I was actually sad. FML

#4158002
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57254) - you deserved it (17207)

On 07/30/2009 at 10:43am - animals - by dumbo (man) - United States (Virginia) - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, I tried to break up with my boyfriend. He said no. FML

#3991086
327 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57744) - you deserved it (26171)

On 07/23/2009 at 10:26pm - love - by Ella (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, in the midst of foreplay, this girl tells me I am so hot, I respond "Ditto." She heatedly responds "I love ditto," to which I suavely reply "I didn't know you were into Pokémon. That may make you even sexier." She knows nothing about Pokémon, but I sure know how to kill the mood. FML

#3971030
317 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17167) - you deserved it (68429)

On 07/23/2009 at 2:42am - intimacy - by MitchFail (man) - United States

Today, I was performing in the musical 'Cabaret'. I was playing a Nazi soldier, swastika armband and all. Someone thought it would be funny to take my real clothes while I was on stage. I had to walk a mile back my house with my costume on. Someone threw eggs at me. FML

#3939096
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47665) - you deserved it (4929)

On 07/21/2009 at 8:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I woke up screaming. Why? Well, I was complaining to my dad yesterday about how I always hit the snooze button and just roll over when my alarm goes off, and how that results in me being late for morning classes. My dad thought he'd help out by placing a mousetrap on the snooze button. FML

#3921342
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42843) - you deserved it (27790)

On 07/21/2009 at 1:38am - misc - by emperor (man) - Bangladesh (Dhaka)

Today, my daughter turned 11. Since she LOVES Harry Potter, I decided to write her an acceptance letter to Hogwarts. When she saw the letter, she screamed and showed me. When she found out I wrote it, she told me she hated me, started crying, and stepped on my foot. FML

#3796227
575 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28852) - you deserved it (86707)

On 07/16/2009 at 6:16am - kids - by notawizard (woman) - Spain (Catalonia)

Today, I was skating with my friends and I decided to go to the gas station to get a pack of cigs. The last thing I remember hearing was "Look out!" I am now with twenty stitches because some idiot bet he could throw a brick farther than another guy. FML

#3522499
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51948) - you deserved it (8047)

On 07/06/2009 at 2:49am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was fired from my volunteer job. Why? Because they said I was working so hard and doing such a good job that I was making the real staff look bad. FML

Today, my mom put some bubblewrap on my desk because she thought I would have fun with it. I'm 18. It was awesome. FML

#3229865
298 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67209) - you deserved it (39409)

On 06/26/2009 at 2:13am - misc - by Jeweler (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was using a public bathroom when a woman backs in, pulls down her pants, and sits on my lap. Needless to say she didn't even notice I was there until I hyperventilated. FML

#2928893
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38659) - you deserved it (3952)

On 06/16/2009 at 12:06am - misc - by yourmom (woman) - United States (Virginia)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: