About Kieki13 : I'm a 14 year old girl.
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Kieki13's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 11/16/2010 at 3:07am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was at the doctors office after throwing up for the past week. My diagnosis? Apparently I'm the first pregnant man. After several minutes of me freaking out and him explaining how it was possible, he told me he was joking and that I'm fine, but my reaction was the best thus far. FML
by youreajoker / 11/10/2010 at 5:28am / Australia (New South Wales) / Health
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when I came. She got pissed and slapped me really hard for cumming inside her because she didnt want to get pregnant. 1. I was wearing a condom. 2. She's on the pill. 3. We were having anal sex. FML
by Tai / 10/31/2010 at 9:30am / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy
Today, while setting up for a party I was having, I put black lights into our bathroom for the cool bright, neon color you get when you pee. When I turn them on to see where I need to continue cleaning, I see many, small, yellow hand prints on the walls. I have a nine year old brother. FML
by Anonymous / 10/31/2010 at 5:05am / United States (California) / Kids
by Anonymous / 10/30/2010 at 12:53am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/27/2010 at 2:01am / United States (New Jersey) / Love
Today, talking to my boyfriend about each others families, we noticed we both had an aunt with the same name. After a while of trying to figure things out, we decide to call her. Turns out that we are long distance cousins. FML
by Oriianna Raiinbow / 10/23/2010 at 2:07am / United States (California) / Love
Today, I was walking down my very steep basement stairs when I fell and rolled all the way down but luckily I didn't hurt anything. While walking back up around the very last stair, my cat jumped out on me, causing me to roll all the way back down. FML
by catattack78 / 10/21/2010 at 10:48am / United States (Maryland) / Health
Today, I'm going on an 8 hour drive with my insane family. This usually means screaming arguments, graphic conversations about my dad's pubes, some karaoke, plenty of farting, some stale Pringles, and an obese golden retriever on my lap the entire time. Arizona, here we come. FML
by fmmlll / 10/18/2010 at 4:56am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, my car door and window were broken when a thief broke into my car. Cost to repair the damage? $600. Increase to my car insurance premiums? $40 a month. What'd they steal from my car? A $0.98 chocolate chip cookie. FML
by Anonymous / 10/16/2010 at 5:54pm / United States (Florida) / Transportation
by Anonymous / 10/15/2010 at 7:44pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/12/2010 at 10:09pm / United States (Texas) / Health
by cantstoplaughing / 10/06/2010 at 12:32am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
Today, to spice things up a bit my wife and I were having sex in our kitchen. She was up on the counter and I moved her over to get in a better position. The stove was still hot from dinner so now my wife has a burn that looks like a double rainbow on her ass. FML
by EffinAhole / 10/03/2010 at 12:27am / Intimacy
by Ugh-Lee / 09/30/2010 at 11:07am / United States / Love
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 3Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his…
- Today, my economics teacher gives us a lot of photocopies, so I told her that she kills pandas by… Today, a young woman on the subway asked me to hold her pocket mirror open in front of her. I asked… Today, I’m a babysitter for a 4 year-old little girl. All afternoon, I attended Barbie’s murder and…