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Kickass89

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Kickass89

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 1264
  • Number of comments : 37
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Kickass89's page activity

Visits<b>shivamtrivedi</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 11:37am<b>alltimelow785</b> - the 07/20/2013 at 10:39pm<b>ch2358</b> - the 11/29/2009 at 11:31pm

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Kickass89's favorite FMLs

Today, I overheard my parents discussing whether or not they could trust me being alone in the house for 2 days. They then came to the decision that I'm too unpopular and unattractive to ever throw a wild party or get laid. FML

#7156329
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33019) - you deserved it (2842)

On 01/05/2010 at 12:00am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, it was the first time my boyfriend had seen me naked. He grabs my breasts and then begins to sing "I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts." He is 22. FML

#7152531
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18724) - you deserved it (5279)

On 01/04/2010 at 9:27pm - intimacy - by ambermcnulty - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was taking a dump at the Home Depot. After I was finished, I was bent over and pulling the toilet paper out of the holder. I pulled too hard, causing the dispenser lid to fling open and smack me on the back of the head. FML

#7150091
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6462) - you deserved it (17790)

On 01/04/2010 at 7:29pm - misc - by B-ran - Sent from mobile version

Today, I pulled a hamstring by taking a dump. FML

#7139059
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26991) - you deserved it (6757)

On 01/04/2010 at 1:43am - health - by sadface (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I walked to the end of my driveway to pick up the newspaper. I read the front page that was talking about people who have been getting hurt from slipping on ice. Laughing about that thought and walking up my driveway, I slip. FML

#7135383
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5861) - you deserved it (29657)

On 01/03/2010 at 10:50pm - health - by fml (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was trying to see how far I could get away from the toilet while pissing. Instead I tripped over backwards and pissed all over my face. FML

#7101810
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7596) - you deserved it (66547)

On 01/02/2010 at 8:41am - misc - by pissfaced (man) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, I realized that I have been playing a little too much Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2. I realized this when I was watching a youtube video and there was someone walking in the background who I impulsively tried to gun down and kill by moving my mouse over him and clicking repeatedly. FML

#7096414
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6349) - you deserved it (32613)

On 01/02/2010 at 1:17am - misc - by Laughluv (man) - United States (California)

Today, I set up a miniature nativity scene in my apartment. Three hours ago, my dog decided it would be a good idea to eat baby Jesus. Two hours ago, the vet laughed and said not to worry because I would 'have him back in time for Christmas'. FML

#6791199
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22981) - you deserved it (5036)

On 12/17/2009 at 9:32am - animals - by gettingacat (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was at the theatre with my 4-year-old son who was situated on my lap. Halfway through the movie, he turns to face me and states loudly, "Mommy, your legs are so furry!". Everyone watching the show turned and stared at us. FML

#6747789
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22750) - you deserved it (8140)

On 12/14/2009 at 1:58am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, my dad offered to take me and my sister to school because we just moved houses. On the way, he asked us why we looked so tired. We just said we were tired from moving house. Truth is, our room is right next to theirs. We heard everything. Loud and clear. FML

#6604367
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19511) - you deserved it (1858)

On 12/04/2009 at 7:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had an elderly man come to my cash register. His total came to $15.50 He handed me $5 in nickels and dimes. A full roll of quarters. Before I could take the roll, he bust it open, making me count it. After that was all counted he was 50 cents short. So he handed me a $10 bill. FML

#6594787
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33905) - you deserved it (2487)

On 12/04/2009 at 1:27am - work - by Chels (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I spent 30 minutes trying to find my glasses. I don't know whats worse, the fact that I was wearing them the whole time, or that my girlfriend played along and helped me look for them. FML

#6594028
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10003) - you deserved it (29507)

On 12/04/2009 at 12:28am - misc - by wobbles (man) - United States (California)

Today, my mom admitted that her story about my dad leaving us for his current wife was a lie. He left when he caught her with a coworker. She blocked his number and got a restraining order to keep him from telling his side of the story. I haven't talked to my dad for six years because of this. FML

#6590388
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47401) - you deserved it (2019)

On 12/03/2009 at 9:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I called my wife to tell her I finally found a job after 6 months. A man answered the phone claiming to be the cable guy. We cut our cable off when I was laid off 6 months ago. FML

#6584948
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35234) - you deserved it (2183)

On 12/03/2009 at 3:13pm - love - by SatelliteUser (man) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I saw a girl walking to class by herself. I thought she was weird for not having any friends to walk with. Thats when I realized I was eating lunch by myself. In my car. FML

#6583766
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10106) - you deserved it (37590)

On 12/03/2009 at 1:13pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)



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