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KiaMaster

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KiaMaster
  • Town/Country : A place
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2269
  • Number of comments : 49
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

About KiaMaster : im me, deal with it.

KiaMaster's last visitors

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KiaMaster's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

KiaMaster's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally lost my virginity. In my boyfriend's racecar bed. FML

#17534409
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27723) - you deserved it (36462)

On 08/21/2011 at 12:54am - intimacy - by Emily - United States (New York)

Today, I was helping some friends put supplies in my crush's car for our picnic. His girlfriend cracked a joke about me, so I just sarcastically laughed and slammed the door shut. Now she has three broken fingers, and I have a reputation as a psychopath. FML

#17522033
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22975) - you deserved it (6313)

On 08/19/2011 at 6:47pm - misc - by friendly_neighbourhood_psycho (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I met my new neighbor. His wi-fi access point is named "TheRapistDownstairs." FML

#17483730
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31701) - you deserved it (2552)

On 08/15/2011 at 8:30pm - misc - by creepedoutlady - United States

Today, I came home from holiday, only to find my house full of small decomposing animals, courtesy of my cat. FML

#17458169
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20903) - you deserved it (4361)

On 08/13/2011 at 6:22am - animals - by Ellencrazee (woman) - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)

Today, a downstairs neighbor of mine claimed money from me because apparently my dog took a dump on the fire escape, and the poop fell through the grates and on her groceries. I don't have a dog, but I paid the money anyway, because I was too ashamed to tell her it was my husband. FML

#17421184
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35020) - you deserved it (7810)

On 08/09/2011 at 6:55pm - animals - by Zoe Avila - United States

Today, my dad shaved his head. This wouldn't be so bad if he didn't expect me to address him as "Captain Picard" 24/7 now. He won't answer me otherwise. FML

#17406072
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20693) - you deserved it (3365)

On 08/08/2011 at 10:12am - misc - by MissArizona (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I took my clothes off in front of my girlfriend for the first time. She made a weird face for a moment, then burst into laughter. She couldn't stop laughing, no matter how hard she tried. FML

#17398167
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34794) - you deserved it (4299)

On 08/07/2011 at 3:43pm - intimacy - by Eddie (man) - Israel (HaMerkaz)

Today, my eight year old son came to me and said he thinks it's time he started wearing bras. It turns out his older brother has been mind-fucking him for the past several months and has him convinced it's something all boys his age do. I can't convince him otherwise. FML

#17390197
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29164) - you deserved it (2544)

On 08/06/2011 at 7:37pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out that my German wasn't as great as I thought it was. Trying to give directions to some German tourists, I tried to say, "I hope I don't get you lost." Turns out I actually said something closer to, "I hope I don't seduce you." FML

#17388195
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20090) - you deserved it (5220)

On 08/06/2011 at 3:10pm - misc - by lostforwords (woman) - Ireland (Tipperary)

Today, my boyfriend showed me his penis for the first time. All I could think to say was, "That's a clean circumcision." FML

#17384491
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26474) - you deserved it (7948)

On 08/06/2011 at 2:35am - intimacy - by plantfood - United States

Today, my roommate demanded that I dance naked for him as a birthday present. When I declined, he offered to pay me. When I declined again, he stormed off to pout in his room and played really loud depressing music. We're both guys and I have 11 months left on my lease with him. FML

#17373472
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38458) - you deserved it (3089)

On 08/05/2011 at 12:46am - intimacy - by Creeped_out_n_stuck (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I finally started doing cardio and getting in shape. What motivated me to do it? Watching a zombie movie. The slow ones bite the dust first. FML

#17355150
294 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24564) - you deserved it (7535)

On 08/03/2011 at 12:55pm - health - by indierocklove - United States (Virginia)

Today, I realized that as a U.S. Marine in the infantry, I'm more afraid to talk to girls than I am of getting shot at. FML

#17352313
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39017) - you deserved it (5320)

On 08/03/2011 at 3:40am - love - by Tim - United States

Today, I realized that since I started working full time, the only friend I have left is my cat. Lonely and bored out of my mind, I told him about my day. He decided to end the conversation by shitting on the floor. FML

#17298828
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24768) - you deserved it (4412)

On 07/29/2011 at 3:17pm - animals - by Username - United States (South Carolina)

Today, while working at Kohl's this woman came up to me and asked if I was Native American, I said yes, she then says "Oh! I thought you guys went extinct." This is the country I live in. FML

#17297056
326 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40892) - you deserved it (3232)

On 07/29/2011 at 11:18am - work - by crazygirl12 - United States (Missouri)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

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  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

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