About Kervik : Hello.
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I took my girlfriend's virginity. A few minutes in she remarked, "If this is what sex is normally like then I'm seriously disappointed." FML
I agree, your life sucks (49873) - you deserved it (12084)
On 06/20/2009 at 10:00pm - intimacy - by anonyme (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I was at a bar. A fat guy looks at me for a while and sits down next to me. He turns and I expect that he'll hit on me. He then buttons down his shirt, presses his man boobs together and say to his friends “Look, I’ve got bigger tits than than the girl next to me!" His friends agreed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49672) - you deserved it (3833)
On 06/05/2009 at 4:54pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Staden Kobenhavn)
Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML
I agree, your life sucks (188785) - you deserved it (21090)
On 03/22/2009 at 6:38am - intimacy - by konens_dick (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I had to sleep in the same room as my grandparents. They checked to see if I was asleep, so I pretended to be to avoid getting scolded for staying up. Turns out they were checking so that they could make love. I witnessed two 70-year-olds have sex in the bed next to me for 20 minutes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (173575) - you deserved it (18033)
On 03/21/2009 at 11:38am - intimacy - by Mike (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I called a priest "lame". He responded jokingly with "God will smite you!" I laughed and walked out the door. I tripped and broke my ankle. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28776) - you deserved it (85902)
On 03/12/2009 at 8:07am - health - by lolzor (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I went round to my Grandparents' to help set up their new Satellite TV. When I turned it on, for some reason it defaulted to "Arab Babes TV". I was therefore inadvertently responsible for the broadcast of porn in my Grandparents' living room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26962) - you deserved it (3517)
On 02/22/2009 at 5:55pm - misc - by Hello my name is (man) - United Kingdom
Today, I turned on my camera to find pictures of my dad's secretary giving him a blowjob. Minutes later, I hear a scream from another room as my 12-year-old sister discovers similar pictures on HER camera. Mom and dad say it's no big deal. FML
I agree, your life sucks (176985) - you deserved it (7208)
On 02/04/2009 at 10:51am - intimacy - by rexob (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was singing to my cat and she reached up and put her paw over my mouth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15923) - you deserved it (26170)
On 02/04/2009 at 6:23am - animals - by Noname - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I sneezed so hard I herniated my back. After passing out from the pain I awoke on the floor covered in my own shit and piss. Unable to move, I had to wait in this state for four hours for my wife to return home from work, clean me up and take me to the hospital. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38833) - you deserved it (1814)
On 01/26/2009 at 7:02pm - health - by Noname - Japan (Fukuoka)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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