KayArGee

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KayArGee

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1305
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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KayArGee's page activity

Visits<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/08/2014 at 4:18pm<b>Golpon</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 7:28pm

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KayArGee's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that my mom isn't coming to see me for Christmas. Instead she'll be spending it in jail for a DUI and battery. Thank you to my cocklick of an aunt for taking a recovering alcoholic to a bar and pressuring her into relapse. FML

by jhulich / 12/24/2013 at 3:48pm / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, my wicked mother has been with us for a week. She's already thrown away my daughter's favorite toy, broke my computer, scratched my oak table, stained my most expensive shirt, peed in our bed, and called the attention of the cops by staring at kids in school. She's staying for three months. FML

by longlongwinter / 12/05/2013 at 11:50am / United Kingdom (Southampton) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I heard crashing noises coming from my dining room. I got up to see what it was; my asshat cat was flinging himself at my chandelier. He'd figured out how to grab the ceiling fan from the other room, build momentum, and launch into my expensive chandelier. Hooray. FML

by IamAflyingCat / 10/22/2013 at 5:12am / United States / Animals

Today, I woke up with a raging hangover. I soon checked my phone, only to find that I'd drunkenly sent nude pictures to several friends' numbers, as well as to my own. I'd then replied to my own message, saying that I'm not gay and telling myself to fuck off. FML

by Anonymous / 10/18/2013 at 1:30pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad and I had a yelling match about me "lying", because I was unable to contact iTunes support without a phone number. To prove a point, he went online to find the phone number. It's been an hour and he's still searching for the number. I can't leave the table until he has found it. FML

by SeriouslyDad / 09/22/2013 at 9:57am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was talking to my husband about our favorite TV show, when he took my face in his hands and sweetly whispered, "You're so pretty. Why must you ruin it with words?" FML

Today, in the middle of examining me, my gynecologist suddenly took a sharp intake of breath and vomited on the floor. FML

by Anonymous / 08/08/2013 at 7:10am / Latvia (Jelgavas) / Health

Today, I found out that when I text my boyfriend, he isn't the one to read them. Instead, he pays his friend to "keep the bitch busy." FML

by Anonymous / 07/31/2013 at 12:49pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, after more than six years of working my ass off, I finally summoned the courage to ask my boss for a raise. She just chuckled, "I'm gonna need you to eat a dick, John." and stared at me unblinking until I awkwardly left. FML

by no new apartment for me / 07/18/2013 at 3:53pm / United States (Maryland) / Work

Today, my girlfriend was sitting on my lap at a birthday party. She thought it would be funny to fart. I came instantly. FML

by needsnewshorts / 07/15/2013 at 9:42pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was teaching my daughter how to drive. We were passing by a merge lane; I told her to slow down and let a green car merge in front of us. She said, "Fuck the green car" and sped up, colliding with it. Apparently she didn't know that would happen. FML

by Anonymous / 07/14/2013 at 11:40pm / United States (Maryland) / Transportation

Today, my boyfriend and I were furniture shopping. They had miniature versions built of some of the desks. He commented how they were "cute for little kids" to use. They were 6 inches tall. I had to explain to him that they were only models, not real desks. I'm dating Zoolander. FML

by anonymous / 07/14/2013 at 9:07pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was browsing porn in my room, when my dad barged in. I quickly switched to another tab, only to see it was parked on another porn page. I had another browser window open, so I switched to that. More porn. My dad said, "Riiiggghhhttt... You need help, son." FML

by fuck / 07/13/2013 at 1:22pm / United Kingdom (Surrey) / Miscellaneous

Today, after asking my psychiatrist about natural alternatives to medication for my depression, she replied, "Why not Zoidberg?" FML

by thanksdoc / 06/24/2013 at 6:12pm / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, my mom left for a bachelorette party. She forgot a gift, so she called me and made me go into her closet, pick out a sex toy from the "box of gag gifts", and bring it to her. Should I pick anal beads or a cock ring? FML

by Anonymous / 06/24/2013 at 2:39pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy