About KRiddle : Born in NS, Canada.
KRiddle's FML badges
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
KRiddle's favorite FMLs
Today, at my mother's funeral, as everyone was around her casket for the viewing, my 5-year-old son in cluelessness of what was going on shouted, "Grandma is more fun when she isn't sleeping." Everyone cried. FML
by Anonymous / 02/25/2013 at 6:00pm / United States (New Jersey) / Kids
Today, after months of a very healthy sex life with my boyfriend, he asked me to let him try anal. I'm dead-set against it, so I tried to let him down easy by jokingly saying that I would, but only if he let me try it on him first. He said, "Sure." Fuck. FML
by Anonymous / 02/23/2013 at 1:27pm / Denmark (Hovedstaden) / Intimacy
Today, I had to drive to my workplace in blizzard conditions. Now that my 12 hour shift is over, I can't get out of the building, as the snow has blown into large drifts in front of the doors. I have to stay overnight until my next 12 hour shift. FML
by sonnyrosa / 02/09/2013 at 7:39am / Canada (Nova Scotia) / Work
by Anonymous / 02/08/2013 at 10:36am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, at my new job, some juvenile cockbite spiked my food with a laxative, as part of some kind of bizarre hazing ritual. The bastard got ratted out and suspended, but my arsehole now feels like it's been blown apart by a nuclear warhead. I thought this shit only happened in movies. FML
by Anonymous / 12/20/2012 at 4:49pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Work
by schooyou101 / 12/03/2012 at 7:53pm / United States (Kansas) / Intimacy
Today, a nearby volcano erupted for the second time. We were all urged to keep our windows and doors closed in case of ash clouds. My father responded by opening every window and door and shouting, "Come at me, bro!" FML
by vanillatwilight2 / 11/20/2012 at 11:50pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Miscellaneous
Today, I woke up with a vague memory of buying something last night while drunk. According to my credit card summary I made a $270 purchase from a home shopping channel. I guess in 5-7 days I'll find out what it was. FML
by fnfantastic / 11/04/2012 at 11:37am / United States (Indiana) / Money
by Indianagirl94 / 10/29/2012 at 6:22pm / United States / Love
by winterbee123 / 10/25/2012 at 4:07am / United States (Oregon) / Work
by soprahb / 10/19/2012 at 2:41am / United States / Love
by Anonymous / 10/15/2012 at 9:19pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous
by fucking fratricidal / 10/13/2012 at 6:25pm / Canada (Nova Scotia) / Miscellaneous
Today, a woman stopped me and started chewing me out for wearing a pentagram necklace. I explained to her that is wasn't a pentagram, it was a Star of David. She continued chewing me out because apparently that still means I hate Jesus. FML
by raz / 10/01/2012 at 8:11pm / United States (North Dakota) / Miscellaneous
Today, my dad forced me to take part in a pathetic act of revenge against our neighbors, who keep parking their 4x4 in front of our house. He made me stand watch while he kept trying to slash their tires. An hour later, we were waiting for my mom to bail us out of jail. FML
by GEE, THANKS DAD / 09/28/2012 at 6:21pm / United States / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on… 2Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 3Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's…
- Today, I found out that applying toothpaste to your penis to make it taste good for your girlfriend… Today, me and my boyfriend were fooling around on my bed when things started to get heated. I said… Today, I had a nice, open chat with my mother. I accidentally let slip that I'm a nymphomaniac. She…