JullietteRosie

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JullietteRosie

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2439
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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JullietteRosie's page activity

Visits<b>mulinazzi</b> - the 01/22/2014 at 11:29am<b>justkeez</b> - the 01/18/2014 at 1:26pm<b>thatwriter</b> - the 11/13/2013 at 3:59pm

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JullietteRosie's favorite FMLs

Today, I ran into my apartment and let one rip, since I'd been holding it the whole elevator ride up. My parents had let themselves in while I was out, and laughed at me for a good 20 minutes. 5ML

by DJ / 01/24/2014 at 8:34pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found my little brother breathing heavily and asked him what he was doing. He looked at me intensely and said "Breathing in all the oxygen so you can't have any and die." 5ML

by SirDirtyRedD / 01/24/2014 at 8:03pm / Iceland (Gullbringusysla) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I found that I conduct so much static electricity that I'm periodically given a shock by my headphones as I walk with them on. 5ML

by PangolinScholar / 01/24/2014 at 7:34pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, in revenge for being grounded for bullying a kid at school, my eight-year-old son flung a handful of Lego in my path as I walked barefoot into the kitchen. I'm still in pain. 5ML

by limping / 01/24/2014 at 6:10pm / Canada / Kids

Today, I was applying for jobs online when my father called. When I told him what I was doing, he said in all seriousness that I should just be a sugar baby. I said he must be joking, but he replied, "Honey, if I had your tits, I'd never work a day in my life." 5ML

by Anonymous / 01/24/2014 at 12:15am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my students unanimously agreed, in front of me, that the only reason they take my course is to look at my ass. FML

by jseid2 / 01/15/2014 at 12:54am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I went to my bedroom for some alone time while my daughter watched TV. I didn't realize that my iPad was still connected to the Apple TV, until I hit play on some porn and heard a scream from the other room. FML

by ConfusedDad / 12/29/2013 at 2:01am / United States / Kids

Today, marks the third week since my sister's guinea pig learned to masturbate. He humps his wheel and makes squeaking noises for five minutes, then rolls over on his side and pants heavily. He does it at least twice a night while I'm trying to sleep. FML

by Anonomous / 12/28/2013 at 7:31pm / United States (Vermont) / Animals

Today, I took an extra xanax to help with my anxiety, then went to sleep. I guess it was probably too much, because I woke up a few hours later, freaking out and panicking because I was convinced I was a bee trapped in a human body. FML

by beemove / 12/28/2013 at 4:19pm / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, my dog has found a new game he likes. It involves him rolling around on my new bed sheets to build up static electricity and run and poke me with his nose so I get shocked. FML

by honeybunny90 / 12/28/2013 at 3:23am / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, I announced my pregnancy to my husband. He responded with, "Well shit, when do these faucets turn on?" and started honking my boobs. FML

by Anonymous / 12/26/2013 at 12:27pm / United States (Alabama) / Love

Today, I am sitting next to a guy who very clearly has lice crawling on his head. It's a six hour flight. FML

by Anonymous / 12/26/2013 at 11:16am / United States (North Carolina) / Health

Today, I got a whistle key finder from my grandma for Christmas. This would have been nice if I could actually whistle. FML

by princesss_14 / 12/25/2013 at 9:07pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mother gave me a Christmas present for the first time in 15 years: a dog. Her 16-year-old, untrained, mean dog who wears diapers. FML

by Eri_Midori / 12/24/2013 at 9:57pm / United States (California) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I asked my lazy daughter to go make her bed. She responded by lighting our garbage bin on fire. FML

by Anonymous / 12/22/2013 at 2:10pm / Israel / Kids