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JuicyCheeks's favorite FMLs
Today, I realized that it has been so long since my wife and I were intimate that I got slightly turned on watching her suck the meat off chicken wings. I'm jealous of fried, sauce-soaked poultry. FML
by therevsev / 10/02/2011 at 2:05am / United States / Intimacy
Today, my boyfriend bought me a gorgeous ring that I fell in love with. As he slid the ring on my finger for the first time, he started moving it up and down my finger and making loud sex sounds, completely ruining the romantic moment. FML
by Anonymous / 09/27/2011 at 1:30pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy
Today, at work while on the toilet, somebody came into the stall next to me and gave a loud play by play of every fart, plop, and grunt. He then asked loudly who I was and when I didn't answer put his head under the stall to look at me. FML
by Anonymous / 09/26/2011 at 2:52pm / United States / Work
by This Guy / 09/26/2011 at 1:18pm / United States / Money
Today, I found out that the double spacing format in an essay refers to the space between each line, not the words. I've been pressing the space bar twice between each word all through high school and halfway through college. FML
by essay2 / 09/24/2011 at 2:47pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/21/2011 at 9:17am / United States / Love
Today, a guy who I hate commented on my Facebook profile picture that I "look like I've fallen off the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down." 60 people liked this, including my boyfriend and best friend. FML
by chloeguest97 / 09/20/2011 at 11:15am / United Kingdom (Solihull) / Miscellaneous
by Alexandra / 09/20/2011 at 4:25am / Lebanon / Intimacy
by incaseudidntkno / 09/18/2011 at 9:36am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/16/2011 at 1:26pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I had a lady come in to order a pizza. She wanted to use a free delivery coupon. After telling her several times that she couldn't use a free delivery coupon, unless she was having the pizza delivered, she told me I have horrible people skills. FML
by pea / 09/12/2011 at 2:32pm / United States / Work
by Anonymous / 08/31/2011 at 10:23am / United Kingdom (Bristol) / Intimacy
Today, while at the grocery store an elderly woman farted very loudly next to me. Everyone in the aisle looked our way. The woman pointed at me, and left the aisle. I received many disgusted looks from children and their parents. FML
by kykynevs / 08/23/2011 at 3:14am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
Today, I'm sitting in a public toilet when a guy kicks the door in and shoves a police badge in my face, screaming for me to tell him "the path of Lemmiwinks". After a whole minute of me shitting my balls off, he bursts into laughter and tells me I've been pranked. I was too embarrassed to report him. FML
by shitless88 / 08/19/2011 at 8:23pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by fml / 08/12/2011 at 2:14am / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy
- Today, I’m on a mission in Africa. My company driver is so old, deaf and half blind that I have to… Today, I threw up when I got home because I'd been drinking with friends. My parents asked what was… Today, I told my son off because he lost a form. A form that I later found in my right-hand pocket.…