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JuicyCheeks's favorite FMLs
by masterman / 08/27/2012 at 2:45am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
Today, I'm recovering from colon surgery. They gave me codeine as pain relief, which has made me constipated. I'm currently sat on the toilet, trying to push out what feels like a small child wrapped in barbed wire out without busting my stitches. FML
by screaming monkey / 04/04/2012 at 6:13am / United Kingdom (Windsor and Maidenhead) / Health
by kb / 02/01/2012 at 12:06am / United States (Texas) / Health
by sorrygrandma / 01/31/2012 at 10:34pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
Today, I watched The Omen with my father. Halfway through driving me back home, he stopped the car and made me get out right there in a rough part of town. Fifteen minutes later, he drove up beside me, laughed hysterically at how terrified I was, and told me to get in. FML
by Anonymous / 01/20/2012 at 7:55pm / United States (New York) / Transportation
by anonymous / 01/15/2012 at 12:58am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I was going over to my friend's house for the first time. A creepy-looking old man answered, and smiled at me. I asked "Is this the right house? Does Isaac live here?" He replied "Yes, he's in the basement. Would you like a drink?" Right then, Isaac called and asked me where I was. FML
by Anonymous / 01/01/2012 at 2:34am / United States (Kansas) / Miscellaneous
by nolife / 12/29/2011 at 7:03am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Cary / 12/26/2011 at 1:17am / United States (New Mexico) / Love
Today, I went on a date with a guy I've had a crush on for a while. I shaved my legs and armpits and wore a short dress. It wasn't until I got to the meeting that I noticed I only shaved one of my legs. FML
by bigmistake / 12/23/2011 at 10:22pm / United States (Illinois) / Love
Today, while waiting for my train, I was listening to a voicemail message on my phone. Out of nowhere, a stranger came up to me from behind and screamed "DELETE!" into my ear. His voice command deleted my message. FML
by anna / 12/22/2011 at 4:25pm / France / Miscellaneous
by awalc / 12/20/2011 at 12:48pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by emmmbo / 12/19/2011 at 10:40am / Australia (Western Australia) / Love
by teejayrn / 12/17/2011 at 1:49am / United States / Love
- Today, straight after we had sex, my boyfriend went to the bathroom. He stayed in there for a long… Today, I sprayed pepper spray on a guy who appeared to be following me. He was really cute, and was… Today, because I’m on my period, I asked my boyfriend to turn around so I could change my clothes.…