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Jmweed

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Jmweed

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 15 August 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1266
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Jmweed's page activity

Visits<b>raven83</b> - the 02/08/2015 at 10:05am<b>sspence</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 1:31am<b>lovingfml</b> - the 03/29/2014 at 11:58am<b>jakekaj</b> - the 05/29/2013 at 11:28pm<b>DutchRogue</b> - the 04/17/2013 at 10:03am<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 7:23am<b>Trollz4daLULZ</b> - the 07/19/2010 at 4:54am<b>Fang_Banger</b> - the 07/04/2010 at 10:07pm

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Jmweed's favorite FMLs

TODAY, I CAME HOME FROM A RELAXING, PEACEFUL VACATION. WHEN I GOT HOME MY 4-YEAR-OLD SON WAS FREE-BALLING WITH POOP ALL OVER HIS BODY, SCREAMING "BOB THE BUILDER WILL KICK YUR ASS." THE BABY SITTER IS NOWHERE TO BE FOUND AND I CAN'T GET HIM TO STOP SAYING, "I LOVE ASS." FML

#20562056
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42164) - you deserved it (5453)

On 03/27/2013 at 4:00am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, wile moving into new place, I saw new, elderly neigbor sitting on er porc. I ceerfully greeted er wit, ( Hello, ow r you? ) Se simply rocked slowly in er cair and replied, ( Just waiting to die. ) Se was te most ceerful person I met all day.

Today.. . my girlfriend an I decidd to try a new place to eat . On our way home we both had upset stomachs . As we racd into the house we realizd niether of us could hold it any longer . Having only one bathroom.. . I let her go first . She explodd on the toilet an I explodd in my pants . FML

#20434472
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39430) - you deserved it (3701)

On 12/31/2012 at 5:36pm - work - by shattysituation - United States

TODAY, I SAW A SHADY LOOKING PERSON ON THE STREET. AS I WALKD PAST HIM, HE SAID, "HEY, COME HERE." THINKING HE NEEDD SOMETHING, I WENT OVER. HE HANDD ME SEVERAL PICTURES OF WIFE, IN PUBLIC AND AT HOME. I'VE NEVER SEEN THIS MAN BEFORE IN LIFE. FML

#20089025
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30179) - you deserved it (1728)

On 09/26/2012 at 12:07am - misc - by ahappypenguin -

Today, my husband and I went to the store . Because we have no car, we had to walk four miles in the 115 fahrenheit weather . It didn't click until we were standing outside the door with a metric shit-tonne of ice-cream, that we'd have to tear ass back home to keep it all from melting . FML

#19876028
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6887) - you deserved it (26461)

On 07/01/2012 at 1:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I didn't even bother to turn mah cellphone off in a movie theater cuz I knew no one would text me or call . FML

#19661266
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23956) - you deserved it (4161)

On 05/22/2012 at 7:02am - misc - by Rick - United States (South Carolina)

TODAY, IT WAS SO COLD TAT I AD TO PUT SLIPPERS OVER MY SLIPPERS . FML

#18207765
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23172) - you deserved it (5676)

On 11/10/2011 at 2:06am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Iowa)

today hila sitting on tha toilat, my phona pockat dialad my boss's call. Ha was in tha naxt stall. Ha answarad. FML

#18010067
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30713) - you deserved it (3660)

On 10/17/2011 at 9:14pm - work - by number2 - United States

TODAY , I WAS AT WORK AS A CASHIER!! AN OLD LADY UNBAGGED EVERYTHING I HAD , AN ANGRILY "TAUGHT" ME HOW TO BAG!! SHE PUTTED POTATOES ON HER EGGS AN BROKE THEM!! SHE THEN SCREAMED THAT I WAS USELESS AN RETARDED IN FRONT OF ALL MAH OTHER CUSTOMERS AN MANAGER!! FML

#17925630
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32760) - you deserved it (1969)

On 10/07/2011 at 1:55am - work - by bdjsbskl - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I'd just finished feeding my parrot an sweeping all the seeds under the cage. As I was walking away, my parrot whistled. I turned around to see him get up onto the food dish, pick up a clawful of food an toss it on the floor. FML

Yesterday I Got A Text From Someone I've Been Avoiding Saying, "Can I Come Visit U Today?" I Replied, "No, Sorry, I'm Not Home." They Then Replied "Thenho Is That In Your Living Room?" Real FML

#17913530
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34572) - you deserved it (7552)

On 10/05/2011 at 7:48pm - misc - by Pookaa (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I was playing video games at 2am. My guinea pig started squealing at me, and wouldn't stop until I turned out te ligts and got into bed. I'm 20 yeres old, and I've let a rodent dictate my bedtime. mega FML

#17911621
303 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25446) - you deserved it (20011)

On 10/05/2011 at 2:58pm - animals - by Beeisc00l - Reserved

Today, I woke up after a few friends came over last night . There r eggs, coins and Oreos glud to the ceiling, 10 broken jars, no food left, and most of the contents of my house r in the garden . And I'm nakd and coverd in permanent marker drawings of Pokémon . My parents return in an hour . FML

#17899100
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12539) - you deserved it (50126)

On 10/03/2011 at 9:19pm - misc - by danii - Reserved

Today, I was in class and really needed to pee. My teacher has chosen to replace our hall pass with a copy of War and Peace. She picks out a page for us to memorise on the shitter, and repeat by heret later. looool If we can't remember, we get locked out of class, and then get detention for bieng absent.

#17789217
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33852) - you deserved it (2970)

On 09/20/2011 at 5:25pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after a week of sportinghat I thought was a flattering pixie cut, I realised that without mah long hair, mah body shape closely resembles a snowman's. FML

#17461404
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23310) - you deserved it (9869)

On 08/13/2011 at 4:29pm - misc - by Karin (woman) - Germany (Berlin)



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