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JimmyDn2000

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JimmyDn2000

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 20 December 1981 (33 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4774
  • Number of comments : 11
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 17 posted

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JimmyDn2000's favorite FMLs

today I walked over to my grandmother's house to pay her a visit . I politely knocked on the door and there was no answer . Fearing that something had happened I violently broke down the door to fine my grandma and her new 80 year old boyfriend having sex . FML

#8643603
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27424) - you deserved it (6828)

On 02/25/2010 at 5:30pm - intimacy - by ryan and Zack - United States (Michigan)

Today, I applied an was accepted 4 a part-time network engineering position. Bieng contract work they asked me what I charge. I replied, "$12 an hour." After a look of surprise they accepted me 4 the position an said, "Our last guy charged $200 an hour, you're a bargain." FML

#8637301
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14373) - you deserved it (29855)

On 02/25/2010 at 10:39am - money - by compguy (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I drunkenly hooked up with friend's cousin!! After trying to stick his finger up butt, he blacked out on top of me with his penis still hard inside me!! I tried yelling his name and pushing him off, with no success!! I ended up having to call friend to help me!! FML

Today, my step-mom yelled at me fir an hour, calling me a slut because our male dog saw me naked. FML

Today, I was waiting downstairs at mah boyfriend's house as he got ready to go. His mom came over an said she was so glad her son had met me, that I made him really happy. I smild thinking how nice that was of her to say. She then continud, "Still, he tells me anal is a no?" FML

#8515469
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25861) - you deserved it (3277)

On 02/21/2010 at 12:16pm - intimacy - by charliesangel123 (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I finally got to ook up wit tis ot guy I'd been talking to fir a few weeks. To ma surprise, e was sinfully drunken e arrives. As we were going at it, e sits on maite carpet. Now te prase ( f***ing te sit out of someone ) as a brand new meaning fir me. FML

#8471213
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19696) - you deserved it (5166)

On 02/20/2010 at 5:47am - intimacy - by jo - United States

Today aftar racantly having had surgary I Iaarnt that soma axtra tissua was naadd to covar up tha hola in tha roof of my mouth. Whara did thay gat this tissua? From a daad parson. I now hava tha flash of a daad parson in my mouth hich by tha way is now infactd. FML

#8361510
293 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37613) - you deserved it (3216)

On 02/17/2010 at 12:07am - health - by Sophie - United States (Texas)

my boyfriend decided to name his penis "Jesus". For the last two hours he's been continuously asking if looool I "want to be touched by Jesus" or will I "let Jesus in to spread his warmth." FML

#8119072
298 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20567) - you deserved it (4723)

On 02/11/2010 at 1:18am - intimacy - by syl - Canada (Alberta)

Today, My Mother Told Me That The Carbon-monoxide Alarm Went Off Last Night, But Since She Didn't Smell Any Gas, She Decided To Just Remove The Batteries And Go Back To Bed!! I Had To Explain To Her That U Can't Smell Carbon Monoxide, And That We Could Have Died In Our Sleep!! FML

#7936537
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43366) - you deserved it (2218)

On 02/06/2010 at 1:22pm - misc - by Kelso (woman) - United States

Today I found outy my boyfriend wouldn't answer is pone last nigt!! He was anging out wit our mutual friend all nigt!! Se ad been texting me all nigt aboutat great sex se was aving!! My boyfriend was te only person tere besides er broter!! FML

#7906309
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31756) - you deserved it (2472)

On 02/05/2010 at 2:01pm - intimacy - by michelle - Sent from mobile version

Yesterday, I Walked In On My Boyfriend Watching A Home Made Sex Tape He Had Previously Made With His Ex-grlfriend. What's Worse Than Him Jerking Off To It? He Was Crying And Hugging A Pillow. FML

#7811688
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31752) - you deserved it (2626)

On 02/02/2010 at 10:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

my boyfriend admitted that he'd lyk to dress me in a squirrel suit and chase me through the forest. This was the surprising result of a discussion on how to spice up our love life. FML

#7753235
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27118) - you deserved it (4322)

On 01/31/2010 at 7:24pm - love - by JK (man) - United States (California)

Today looool I realized wat all te women I've been wit ave in common: Craigslist. FML

#7743505
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6770) - you deserved it (25245)

On 01/31/2010 at 12:42pm - love - by depr3ssed (man) - United States (Texas)

Today I was letting mah boyfriend of 4 years tie me up and do stuff to me. After finishing on mah face he then left. My parents had to untie me. FML

#7609277
332 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42510) - you deserved it (11989)

On 01/27/2010 at 8:35am - intimacy - by chanclepants - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend kept trying to convince me to do anal with him. After denying him several times he told me "Why it feels good, trust me." I asked him how would he know. There was a long awkward silencehen he then replied with "I'm not gay I swear."

#7563904
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30834) - you deserved it (4383)

On 01/25/2010 at 3:47am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)



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