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JimmyDn2000

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JimmyDn2000
  • Town/Country : Saint Louis, USA
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 20 December 1981 (32 years)
  • Number of visits : 2055
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 13 posted

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JimmyDn2000's favorite FMLs

Today, I was having the most wonderful bath. The water was steaming, the bubbles were bubbly, and I was reading a really good book. I put my book down to yawn and looked to my right. My gaze was met by the lovely face of my brother's pet tarantula. FML

#13574162
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29876) - you deserved it (2689)

On 10/24/2010 at 8:21am - misc - by mzgabbster (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, I found dried cum in my hair - after being at work for two hours. FML

#13572879
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12134) - you deserved it (40317)

On 10/24/2010 at 3:31am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, while I was substitute teaching a middle school class, a boy, named Chris, refused to get in the boy's line for the bathroom. After I had said, "Chris, what makes you think you're a girl?" in a very loud voice, one of the other students said "She is a girl." I've scarred a child for life. FML

#13571431
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11278) - you deserved it (44613)

On 10/24/2010 at 1:26am - kids - by badteacher (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I decided to be adventurous and give my boyfriend head in the downstairs tv room. Just as he was about to cum I heard someone walking towards the door. I took my mouth off to get up and lock the door just as he came. Didn't make it to the door but my dad saw something he will never forget. FML

#13571310
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10104) - you deserved it (33845)

On 10/24/2010 at 1:18am - intimacy - by stickyface (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, my boyfriend said he wants a Hello Kitty wedding. FML

#13559273
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35178) - you deserved it (8331)

On 10/23/2010 at 5:07am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was casually looking through my girlfriend's phone while she got ready, though she made me promise not to. To my confusion, I discovered that she had me listed as 'Saturday' in her contacts. There was also a Thursday, Friday and Sunday listed. I only ever see her on Saturdays. FML

#13520163
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40078) - you deserved it (9385)

On 10/20/2010 at 12:47am - love - by iprobablyhaveherpes - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I realized the benefits at Burger King are better than at my company. I'm an engineer, have three degrees, speak three languages fluently, and work at a multi-billion dollar company. The guy flipping burgers has better health care and more corporate 401k contributions than I do. FML

#13518808
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27011) - you deserved it (3442)

On 10/19/2010 at 11:01pm - work - by engineerdude91 (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my boss told me that I'd confessed my love to him last night when he'd held my hair back as I puked. FML

#13510751
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8679) - you deserved it (27296)

On 10/19/2010 at 11:24am - work - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, it's my two year anniversary with my wife. She's celebrating the day with her new boyfriend. FML

#13498191
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30838) - you deserved it (2673)

On 10/18/2010 at 12:01pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my sister asked me if she could go into my closet to borrow my favourite dress for a party she was going to tonight. When I asked her where she was going, she said to a Halloween costume party. My sister is going as a prostitute. FML

#13476444
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7262) - you deserved it (19725)

On 10/16/2010 at 8:31pm - misc - by meegs (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my car door and window were broken when a thief broke into my car. Cost to repair the damage? $600. Increase to my car insurance premiums? $40 a month. What'd they steal from my car? A $0.98 chocolate chip cookie. FML

#13475038
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31483) - you deserved it (2817)

On 10/16/2010 at 5:54pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend told me "don't worry, someday you'll be mature as well." By this, he meant that I will be willing to have sex with him in public. FML

#13454741
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25638) - you deserved it (4028)

On 10/15/2010 at 1:13am - intimacy - by anouk05 (woman) - Switzerland (Vaud)

Today, I was called to reports of a drunk and disorderly male. I arrived to discover a drunk man having explosive diarrhoea in a photo booth. He turned to me me and shouted 'God save the Queen'. It's then that I remembered that it's my job to do something about it. FML

#13444115
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27944) - you deserved it (2917)

On 10/14/2010 at 9:42am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Reserved

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me after being "pressured" into a relationship with another guy. But it's okay, she said she would think of me every time she made love to him. FML

#13442740
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33360) - you deserved it (2709)

On 10/14/2010 at 4:24am - intimacy - by tman (man) - United States (California)

Today, after a small fight with my girlfriend, I started to miss her, so I typed her name into Google on a whim. Surprisingly, I find a link to a blog in which the owner describes his ongoing effort to seduce my girl. During times she told me she was alone. Thanks babe. FML

#13442639
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23601) - you deserved it (2695)

On 10/14/2010 at 4:00am - love - by Anon - United States (California)



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