Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Jf770

Search for a member

Jf770

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 7 October 1996 (17 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1740
  • Number of comments : 102
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 30 posted

About Jf770 : I wil sen rayn of fier dwn upn u

Jf770's page activity

Visits<b>marleybree</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 5:48am<b>MySecretaccount</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 2:08pm<b>greeneyebeauty9</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 10:31am<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 3:01pm<b>YouMadBra</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 2:04pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 7:17pm<b>starsierra</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 7:22pm<b>Allornone</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 11:25pm<b>coin69</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 11:58pm<b>WildDeerbra</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 2:05am<b>TuChiLE_MeXiCaNO</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 4:02am<b>cokeman666</b> - the 04/30/2014 at 11:01am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 12:46pm<b>J352SAURUS</b> - the 04/24/2014 at 3:25am<b>mordecaiandrigby</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 7:02pm<b>sneakerkev</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 10:53pm<b>SnapTail6</b> - the 04/12/2014 at 10:13pm<b>PAsurvivor</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 11:37pm

Jf770's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of Jf770's badges

Jf770's favorite FMLs

Today, while at family dinner, my boyfriend got drunk and told my entire family the things I do in bed. FML

#18519354
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32887) - you deserved it (4923)

On 12/15/2011 at 12:26pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I was giving a presentation at work, when I said, "But we could care less about that." My boss asked if I meant, "Couldn't care less." Wanting to avoid embarrassment, I tried to think up an excuse, only to end up blurting that it was my phone's auto-correct. FML

#18512301
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6936) - you deserved it (30258)

On 12/14/2011 at 4:21pm - work - by sharon (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I accidentally called my cute boss "babe." I now have to pretend it's what I call everyone, and start calling all my coworkers "babe." FML

#18508459
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13207) - you deserved it (29186)

On 12/14/2011 at 12:18am - work - by Shelly - United States (California)

Today, as part of my job as a performer, I had to show off my skills with a switchblade in front of an audience. A kid shot a rubber band at me. I then needed stitches. FML

#18501912
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26506) - you deserved it (2645)

On 12/13/2011 at 9:00am - work - by Anonymous - Malaysia

Today, while having dinner with my boyfriend's family, his mom told me that it looks like I've gained quite some weight. When my boyfriend told her that this was a rude thing to say, she said it wasn't rude, just the truth. FML

#18493088
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28610) - you deserved it (5627)

On 12/12/2011 at 8:45am - love - by Embarrassed (woman) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, I walked into the Macy's bathroom to find Santa taking a dump with the door open. Merry Christmas. FML

#18490910
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24365) - you deserved it (2373)

On 12/12/2011 at 12:15am - misc - by tishihish - United States

Today, I was cuddling up on the couch with my girlfriend, when my drunken mother walked in the room, slurred out, "Room for one more?" and leaped on top of us. FML

#18468865
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31431) - you deserved it (2782)

On 12/09/2011 at 2:38pm - love - by Vince (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my dad finally decided to give me the "sex talk." It was going fine until he said, "If you ever decide to have sex, picture my face like this" and pointed to his face, which had a creepy, intense stare. He just ruined sex for me. Forever. FML

#18467751
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42106) - you deserved it (5129)

On 12/09/2011 at 10:40am - intimacy - by Aly (woman) - United States

Today, I was at my job as a bartender where I had to listen to a 40-something man with no legs drunkenly explain just how much he loves nipples. FML

#18422045
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26654) - you deserved it (3390)

On 12/03/2011 at 8:39pm - intimacy - by sugarbeet - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my mom went through my textbook and sharpied everything that could be "pornographic." It's a high-school biology textbook. FML

#18369717
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28022) - you deserved it (1669)

On 11/27/2011 at 8:07pm - misc - by wow - United States (Texas)

Today, I cut my penis on a desk fan. FML

#18217902
380 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17996) - you deserved it (76372)

On 11/11/2011 at 10:53am - intimacy - by dumbassbuffet (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I took my girlfriend out for dinner to a fancy Italian restaurant for our one year anniversary. After giving her some roses, freshly baked cookies, and a thoughtful poem I wrote for her, she started laughing and asked for her real gift. FML

#18202130
410 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45541) - you deserved it (6584)

On 11/09/2011 at 3:00pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, my mother came into my room and had a thirty minute long conversation with me. She kept looking very nervous and uncomfortable. Only after she left did I realize that a porn site was open on my computer screen. The entire time. FML

#18048411
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14533) - you deserved it (45670)

On 10/22/2011 at 7:26pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. Devastated, he withered onto the floor into an inconsolable wreck in front of dozens of people. The ribbon of embarrassment that went down my spine was too much for me to handle, so I had to tell him I was "only joking." FML

#17901380
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12243) - you deserved it (38710)

On 10/04/2011 at 1:22am - love - by backtosquareone - Asia/Pacific Region

Today, the clerk at Walmart asked me if the stretch mark cream I was buying was for my wife. I wish I could've said yes. FML

#17860948
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21586) - you deserved it (3678)

On 09/29/2011 at 1:01am - health - by random0605 - United States (Utah)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: