Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Jenny246844

Search for a member

Jenny246844
  • Town/Country : :D, :D
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 1 January 1990 (24 years)
  • Number of visits : 1351
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About Jenny246844 : :D

Jenny246844's last visitors

MagmasliverKal3Y

Jenny246844's FML badges

Facebook

Between your Facebook account and your FML account, things are no longer complicated: their relationship is official. We like this.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Jenny246844's badges

Jenny246844's favorite FMLs

Today, I was locked out of my house and had to pee. I waited an hour for my boyfriend to come home. When I saw him pull into the driveway, I peed myself in excitement. FML

#19240450
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22591) - you deserved it (6317)

On 03/08/2012 at 5:23pm - misc - by shelly - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was debating if I actually do talk to myself. I was having this conversation with myself. FML

#19236548
96 comments

Today, I was very cold and tired, so I took a shower to warm up and went to bed. The minute I hopped into bed, it collapsed and broke. I have spent half-an-hour rearranging furniture to get the mattress on to the floor. Now I'm cold again. FML

#19173617
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19031) - you deserved it (2703)

On 02/27/2012 at 7:36am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was having sex with my husband. We thought the house was empty so we didn't mind being loud. Apparently, my grandma thought it would be fun to give us a surprise visit. All I found was a note on the counter from her and the spare key saying "Next time, I'll call." FML

#19169657
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27860) - you deserved it (3779)

On 02/26/2012 at 7:02pm - intimacy - by . - United States (California)

Today, I was feeling frisky for the first time in months, so I started feeling up my husband. He kept insisting he had a headache and that he wasn't feeling it tonight. When I noticed his sarcasm, he said "Yeah, doesn't feel so great, does it?" and turned the TV volume up. FML

#19156948
261 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7515) - you deserved it (40062)

On 02/24/2012 at 10:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend said I could only take her virginity while I have a flaccid penis, so I won't hurt her. I get hard from just staring at her covered ass. FML

#19131405
405 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36508) - you deserved it (5417)

On 02/21/2012 at 2:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I found out that my desk is perfectly placed so that my boss can shoot me with a Nerf gun from his office. FML

#19118212
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21308) - you deserved it (2561)

On 02/19/2012 at 9:42pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I accidentally left my cell phone at the restaurant. When I realized my mistake, I went back to see if anyone had found it. They said no, so I gave them my number to call if it turned up. I realized later that I'd given them my cell phone number. FML

#19115429
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7559) - you deserved it (20190)

On 02/19/2012 at 2:29pm - misc - by queenbee12345678 - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I realized the $40 iPhone case I bought to keep my new phone from getting scratched, scratched my iPhone. FML

#19114135
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19327) - you deserved it (5267)

On 02/19/2012 at 10:30am - misc - by LadyGore - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was holding my 3 year old brother, and apparently he thinks it's hilarious to pull my tank top down and scream ''BOOBS!'' in public. FML

#19093688
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28354) - you deserved it (4241)

On 02/16/2012 at 2:41pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out that driving for 2 weeks on 3/4 of a tank doesn't mean my truck magically got more efficient, it means my gas gauge is broken. FML

#19092080
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9893) - you deserved it (25082)

On 02/16/2012 at 7:49am - misc - by Kramer - Canada (Ontario)

Today, feeling out of shape, I went for a jog. I got mugged. FML

#19090033
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22959) - you deserved it (2205)

On 02/15/2012 at 10:59pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I was walking down the street, when a car started cruising alongside me. I looked over, annoyed, at which point the driver started screaming obscenities and telling me that I'm "gonna get it" for "betraying" him, before angrily speeding off. I'm too scared to even sleep now. FML

#19044019
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18966) - you deserved it (2018)

On 02/10/2012 at 9:14pm - misc - by Saw (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, I was looking through some old family photos. I don't know what the hell was going on in my head, but I idly double-tapped on one to zoom in. They were prints. FML

#19042625
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7653) - you deserved it (22914)

On 02/10/2012 at 5:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I learned that my "cash back rewards" for credit card purchases are mailed with the monthly statement. The same monthly statement that goes straight into the shredder or fireplace because I prefer to do my banking online. FML

#18996100
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5870) - you deserved it (33562)

On 02/04/2012 at 9:51pm - money - by twiggy24 (woman) - United States (Kentucky)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: