About Jenny246844 : :D
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
Today, my friends and I planned to go to a waterpark together. However, due to a "miscommunication," I, and only I, was given both the wrong time and the wrong meeting place. I spent three hours sitting in a parking lot in little more than my swimming suit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16356) - you deserved it (1660)
On 08/05/2012 at 6:05pm - misc - by crissy becks - United States (California)
Today, everyone found out about the strange but intense fetish I have for women physically lifting me. It all came out when my friend, a female bodybuilder, decided to grab and pick me up for a laugh. I came in my pants, in front of about twenty people. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30132) - you deserved it (6961)
On 07/25/2012 at 12:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I had a few friends over. Wanting to seem cool, I yelled at my girlfriend to get me a beer. She chucked four bottles at my head. All my friends cheered her on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4462) - you deserved it (51336)
On 07/19/2012 at 12:55am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, my husband and I went to the store. Because we have no car, we had to walk four miles in the 115 fahrenheit weather. It didn't click until we were standing outside the door with a metric shit-tonne of ice-cream, that we'd have to tear ass back home to keep it all from melting. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4580) - you deserved it (16393)
On 07/01/2012 at 1:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, my dog was licking the dishes in the dishwasher when his collar got stuck on it. Then he got scared of the dishwasher rack following him and ran away really fast. Now I have no dishes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14340) - you deserved it (4408)
On 06/28/2012 at 1:20am - animals - by lala8940 - United States
Today, I slammed my middle finger in a drawer. I screamed and my mom came running into the kitchen. She asked me what was wrong, so without thinking I stuck up my middle finger. She hasn't spoken to me since this morning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18643) - you deserved it (3825)
On 06/26/2012 at 2:05am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, and for the last week, I've resorted to driving myself to the nearest corner store to take my daily dump. I'm doing this because I recently moved in with my boyfriend, and I'm afraid he'll be disgusted at how often I clog the toilet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9436) - you deserved it (21378)
On 06/21/2012 at 6:02am - health - by TheDumper (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, all my guy friends kept hugging me tightly and then softly and then tightly again. I later found out they just wanted to feel my boobs on their chests. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22037) - you deserved it (5793)
On 06/14/2012 at 4:10pm - intimacy - by a chick in California - United States (California)
Today, I was cashiering, and a customer's change came to $5.51. She looked pretty stinking rich, so I just gave her $5.50. She demanded the extra penny, and I asked if she really needed it. She said, "No, but they do, asshole," and dropped her $5.51 in the charity donation box. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5792) - you deserved it (75863)
On 06/13/2012 at 12:00pm - money - by ouch - United States (Florida)
Today, I came out of the closet. I came out on Facebook to spare myself awkward conversations and gossip. I wrote a deeply meaningful status about my partner and my pride in who I was. The only responses were, "Lol", "Hacked", and similar remarks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22392) - you deserved it (8472)
On 06/02/2012 at 2:50am - misc - by OutOfTheCloset - United States (Texas)
Today, I went to the hospital for stomach pains, and was told that it sounds like I have an ovarian cyst. My mom went into a rage, screaming that I'd lied to her about being a virgin. Despite the doctor explaining that sexual activity has nothing to do with it, she refuses to believe him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24556) - you deserved it (1035)
On 06/01/2012 at 5:05pm - health - by Briscuit (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, Child Protective Services came to my house, because my 7-year-old son told people at school that he was uncomfortable sleeping in his uncle's bed. I had to explain to them that the uncle in question died 2 years ago, and that's why it felt weird. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24815) - you deserved it (1895)
On 06/01/2012 at 3:02am - kids - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was so broke I went to Costco, not to buy anything, but to eat their free food samples. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21540) - you deserved it (2226)
On 05/30/2012 at 9:52pm - money - by thedri11 - United States (California)
Today, I spilled my guts to my girlfriend, saying I'm scared that all I do is upset her. I then had to sit through a speech about how upset she was that I hadn't told her sooner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16183) - you deserved it (3747)
On 05/29/2012 at 1:50pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands (Flevoland)
Today, I went to my first ever job interview, in a totally stressed out state. The employer's first question was: "What's your name?" I forgot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14248) - you deserved it (6521) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Monday 20 May 2013
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