About JayJavaMonsterr : Awesomeness & swag define ME ;)
*RAWR*
I dont give a sh*t about what people think of me.
Monster is SEXY! Especially the JavaMonsters xD
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Perfectionist
Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.
The rules are the rules
Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.
Today, I realized the $40 iPhone case I bought to keep my new phone from getting scratched, scratched my iPhone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18829) - you deserved it (5222)
On 02/19/2012 at 10:30am - misc - by LadyGore - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I was on the subway head bobbing to my favorite track when the guy across from me gets up, punches me in the face and says, "Don't nod at my wife like that." FML
I agree, your life sucks (22962) - you deserved it (2564)
On 02/19/2012 at 6:17am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I felt sorry for the weird chick at work that everybody avoids and decided to initiate a conversation with her. She interrupted me mid-sentence to tell me about her vaginal odor problems, before shoving her hand into my chip packet and inviting herself to dinner at my house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31051) - you deserved it (6773)
On 02/19/2012 at 4:15am - intimacy - by meet Chloe - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, while babysitting, one of the boys fell on an exposed pipe and broke it. It spewed water five feet into the air, spread water across four rooms, and completely soaked another of the boys. Their parents had only left fifteen minutes before. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17635) - you deserved it (1825)
On 02/19/2012 at 12:49am - kids - by CamoElla - United States
Today, my boyfriend poked me on Facebook. I got excited because this is as close as he's come to touching me in weeks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20757) - you deserved it (3882)
On 02/19/2012 at 12:40am - love - by Skullie - United States (Ohio)
Today, I went to choir rehearsal at 7:30 in the morning. When the guy I have a major crush on stood next to me, I got really excited, so I tried to sound good. After the song ended, he asked me if I wanted some gum to cover up my morning breath. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17612) - you deserved it (7683)
On 02/18/2012 at 11:03pm - love - by snowinggrey - United States
Today, I had to stop my 26 year old fiancé from picking his nose and eating it like a little boy. Three times. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16550) - you deserved it (526)
Today, I had to explain to my girlfriend of six months that giving another guy a blow job IS cheating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38444) - you deserved it (3398)
On 02/18/2012 at 1:34am - intimacy - by hatinthelife - United States (Utah)
Today, I was talking to my husband about a work colleague, whose boyfriend is always sending her flowers and fawning over her. I mentioned how I've never been treated like that. He glanced up from his video game and said, "Shit, Mel. Get a boob job then." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24168) - you deserved it (5728)
On 02/17/2012 at 9:04pm - love - by Mel Ancholy (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I went to an extended family reunion. I started chatting to my great grandpa, and he asked me what I do for a living. Before I could tell him I breed animals, my visibly drunk dad interrupted and slurred, "Oh, she jacks things off. Horses, pigs, just about anything, really." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18999) - you deserved it (2406)
On 02/17/2012 at 7:13pm - intimacy - by -_- (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)
Today, I had to explain to my 18-year-old boyfriend why it is not okay to pee in the pool. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17322) - you deserved it (3625)
On 02/17/2012 at 9:13am - misc - by nycol (woman) - Australia
Today, I took my grandmother for a spin in my new car. Apparently, she had no idea that seat-warmers exist and that hers was turned on, because fifteen minutes into the ride she started shouting, "My ass is on fire!" causing me to swerve into a pole. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19263) - you deserved it (5041)
On 02/17/2012 at 8:25am - misc - by BOOP - United States (Montana)
Today, I went out on a first date. He insisted we go to McDonald's and split a Happy Meal because he "didn't want to waste any money on a first date." FML
I agree, your life sucks (25366) - you deserved it (3039)
On 02/17/2012 at 4:44am - love - by Cheap N Happy (woman) - United States
Today, I was in a grocery store with my great-grandmother. It would've been nice to know she hadn't taken her medication before she started beating the cashier with her umbrella. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16374) - you deserved it (1328)
On 02/17/2012 at 3:01am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)
Today, I had to have a word with my boss about how him coming into work drunk is probably not a very good idea. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14824) - you deserved it (1457)
On 02/17/2012 at 1:22am - work - by Christinemh329 - United States
Wednesday 15 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
