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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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JF4509

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JF4509
  • Town/Country : Mt. Airy, US
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 22 February 1994 (17 years)
  • Number of visits : 924
  • Number of comments : 51
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About JF4509 : I love frank :D

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JF4509's favorite FMLs

Today, I followed an acne treatment. It was only after I'd finished the treatment that I read the bottom line, stating "Do not scrub your face". I only had one pimple to start with, now it looks like I sandpapered my face. FML

#9057957 (114)

I agree, your life sucks (4333) - you deserved it (16523)

On 03/13/2010 at 9:30pm - health - by Painfulfaceforme - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I got home early from work. When I got home I got to see my dad chasing my mom around the house, naked. FML

#9015230 (148)

I agree, your life sucks (20560) - you deserved it (2046)

On 03/12/2010 at 1:05am - misc - by ugh - United States

Today, my three year old nephew was pointing at the TV screen and saying "Uncle, Uncle!" He thought it was me on the screen. It was Rosie O'Donnell. FML

#8911500 (119)

I agree, your life sucks (18710) - you deserved it (2525)

On 03/08/2010 at 1:16am - misc - by raidered - United States (California)

Today, I was eating pizza with my girlfriend. She got sauce on the corner of her mouth so I tried to be sexy and lick it off. It wasn't sauce, it was a cluster of zits. FML

#8889427 (293)

I agree, your life sucks (13842) - you deserved it (24000)

On 03/07/2010 at 9:12am - misc - by choldcreations - United States (South Carolina)

Today, a really hot guy smacked my ass. I farted. FML

#8751188 (453)

I agree, your life sucks (33669) - you deserved it (6913)

On 03/01/2010 at 5:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I learnt that if you accidentally sit on a hamster, instead of dying, it bites your testicles. FML

#8742333 (298)

I agree, your life sucks (6543) - you deserved it (25419)

On 03/01/2010 at 4:13am - animals - by ItHurtsLIkeHell (man) - Malaysia (Pulau Pinang)

Today, I was at the gym with my boyfriend. He is a bit feminine, but it has never really bothered me. Until I realised I was lifting heavier weights than he was. FML

#8742158 (243)

I agree, your life sucks (18139) - you deserved it (6204)

On 03/01/2010 at 3:53am - love - by Delilah (woman) - Norway (Sor-Trondelag)

Today, after finalizing my divorce, I decided to go out with a guy I had been ogling for months, after much anticipation and a few rounds of drinks at the bar, I was ready to roll. Much to my disappointment, his penis was so small the condom wouldn't stay on. FML

#8741180 (227)

I agree, your life sucks (14921) - you deserved it (4839)

On 03/01/2010 at 2:30am - intimacy - by Lovejunkie (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I had just finished riding my bike when I ran into the girl I am secretly in love with. While I walked over to her I got an erection through my spandex biking shorts. FML

#8730305 (183)

I agree, your life sucks (13035) - you deserved it (6661)

On 02/28/2010 at 9:15pm - intimacy - by hornyloser770 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went skinny dipping with a few friends at my friend's house. It was really fun until one of my friends shrieked, saying there were bugs in the pool. Everyone jumped out and looked at her. Turns out the "bugs" she saw was my body hair. FML

#8708585 (135)

I agree, your life sucks (14100) - you deserved it (4195)

On 02/28/2010 at 1:31am - health - by annonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, I missed points on a math quiz because I thought 2 times 5 was 20. I'm a math major. FML

#8663559 (174)

I agree, your life sucks (4880) - you deserved it (21211)

On 02/26/2010 at 12:57pm - misc - by mathhhh (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my mother walked in on my boyfriend licking whipped cream off my nipples. FML

#8663511 (447)

I agree, your life sucks (8255) - you deserved it (15153)

On 02/26/2010 at 12:54pm - intimacy - by hannah12345 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I found out the mature woman I had a one-night-stand with six weeks ago, is six weeks pregnant. I'm 21, she's 52. FML

#8658990 (298)

I agree, your life sucks (9262) - you deserved it (27068)

On 02/26/2010 at 6:22am - intimacy - by Capt_Hammer (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my dog farted. Immediately, he turned around to sniff his stink then furiously licked his butthole. He then licked my nose. FML

#8658906 (108)

I agree, your life sucks (17041) - you deserved it (5687)

On 02/26/2010 at 6:13am - animals - by aaalias34 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was finally hooking up with a girl I was after for a long time.Things got really hot and heavy but she stopped and looked at me weird. She said, "I can't do it, you're really wet. It looks like chicken fat." FML

#8658617 (116)

I agree, your life sucks (11205) - you deserved it (2128)

On 02/26/2010 at 5:21am - intimacy - by humiliated - United States (Pennsylvania)