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Iola94's favorite FMLs
by merissa22 / 09/01/2012 at 1:37pm / United States (Illinois) / Health
by iliveintexas / 09/01/2012 at 10:09am / United States (Texas) / Health
Today, the girl I went on an awkward date with two weeks ago showed up at university and started smashing my car with a bat. She then broke down in tears and alternated between declaring her love, and cussing me out for "cheating" on her. FML
by Anonymous / 08/31/2012 at 8:49pm / Australia (Queensland) / Love
by jon / 08/31/2012 at 5:31pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
Today, I was playing some CoD online, when I realised I'd started humming an annoyingly catchy Bieber tune. Before I could come to my senses and pull out my mic, a bunch of my teammates started sarcastically singing along. FML
by bieberyoulittleSHIT / 08/31/2012 at 3:20pm / United Kingdom (York) / Geek
Today, I was out apartment hunting with my boyfriend. We visited a marvelous place that ticked all the boxes on our requirement checklist, but my boyfriend was unenthused. There was just one small detail that I hadn’t factored in: it's very badly located if ever zombies attack. FML
by TBTC / 08/31/2012 at 3:16am / France (Pays de la Loire) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 08/30/2012 at 2:33pm / United States (Maine) / Miscellaneous
Today, I had to force myself to take a dump at school, even though I have severe restroom anxiety and shyness. I had finally relaxed enough to go when the tornado drills went off mid-dump, and 46 students and teachers packed into the bathroom with me. FML
by DamnTornadoAlley / 08/30/2012 at 1:55am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend told me that he had once been possessed by demons, and that he now sleeps with a knife under his pillow for protection from, "The dark spirits that are feasting upon his soul." I'm not sure that I'll be sleeping over anytime soon. FML
by StillBetterThanTwilight / 08/28/2012 at 11:56am / United States (Minnesota) / Love
by masterman / 08/27/2012 at 2:45am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
Today, while I was at work, my wife sent me a few pictures of her in a new lingerie, to "spice up" my day. She didn't realize that I have iCloud turned on so I can share files with my colleagues. My boss and a dozen other employees received the same pictures. FML
by Michael D. / 08/25/2012 at 12:06pm / United States (Georgia) / Work
by Anonymous / 08/25/2012 at 8:47am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous
Today, after my shift at the police station, I went on a date with a girl I recently met. We had a great date, that is until I opened the car door for her, and out of habit, pushed down on her head as she got in. FML
Today, instead of staying home, I took an hour-long bus ride in the middle of the night to my girlfriend's place because on the phone she said, "I desperately need your body right now". It turned out she was just cold. She is also on her period. FML
by Rotarius / 08/23/2012 at 2:09pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
by fet / 08/23/2012 at 10:30am / United Kingdom (Bristol, City of) / Miscellaneous
- Today, my boyfriend and I decided to have sex for the first time, the one day my period came early.… Today, I delivered a pizza to a former coworker. He answered the door with his pants below his ass… Today, my ex-boyfriend posted on my boyfriend's facebook wall. Apparently I give awful blowjobs. FML